Daily Sexy Musing: Drunk Love

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When it comes to matters of love and sex, alcohol has a mixed reputation. On one hand, it lowers our inhibitions and makes us more willing to pursue feelings that we wouldn’t have pursued. On the other, it can really hinder the actual mechanics of intimacy. Anyone who has tried to kiss someone while drunk knows that all too well.

In college, I saw many cases of alcohol both helping and hindering various acts of romance. I’ve watched a couple do shots and have the best time together at a club. I’ve also seen people do just as many shots and fall over one another in a very unromantic way. It’s a mixed bag, but like any tool, it depends on how it’s used.

As someone who didn’t start drinking until much later in life, I can appreciate how alcohol helps us navigate the various social processes that often come with romance. It doesn’t just loosen inhibitions. It frees our words, so to speak. It allows us to be more upfront than we otherwise would and I think that valuable in any romantic pursuit, especially those with poor social skills.

Others may have had bad experiences with alcohol and not just in terms of their love lives. I understand that and this Daily Sexy Musing may not work for them. For those who have found a way to incorporate the effects of alcohol into a healthy, sexy relationship, I think we’ll be on the same page. Like anything, you can overdo it. When you strike a healthy balance, though, the benefits are as remarkable as they are sexy.

A can of beer.

A glass of wine.

A shot of whiskey.

A bottle of vodka.

Whatever form it takes, we gleefully imbibe. That hot, burning sensations in our throats warns us what we’re in for. Nerves will be dampened and inhibitions will be lost. We take on those risks in hopes of reaping greater rewards. There may be pain and discomfort later, but with every drink, we embrace the here and now.

I feel my tongue loosen.

I feel your body open.

I feel our souls reveal themselves as the effects take hold.

We laugh, cheer, and dance. Everything starts to spin. It’s no longer possible to scrutinize every passing moment. For once, rules and propriety cannot keep us bound. I won’t apologize for feeling good, nor will I hesitate to share that experience with others. When others scorn, I just take another drink.

Every sip is an affront to a world intent on containing our passions. A lurid smile and playful grasp spits on the foundations of civilization. Rather than build and toil, we cheer and celebrate. We step away from our duties, defy our overlords, and live life on our terms. A drink may start as an excuse, but it soon becomes a catalyst.

The price we pay later goes up, but the feelings we embrace in the moment gain value. Through slurred speech and blissful daze, we are free and unbound. Everything becomes possible. Everyone becomes a new connection. For once, the life we live is our own.

With every drink, we turn restraint and to revelry.

With every drink, we turn deviance into decadence.

With every drink, we turn distress into catharsis.

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Jack Fisher’s Weekly Quick Pick Comic: War Of The Realms #1

Every week, the world is in desperate need of something to make it just a little more fun. As such, every Wednesday brings us a fresh batch of comics that achieves just that and then some. With the anticipation of “Avengers Endgame” at unprecedented levels, we all need something to tide us over until we cram into theaters and send piles of money to our Disney overlords.

Thankfully, a comic like “War of the Realms #1” does plenty to scratch that superhero itch and it doesn’t require anyone to deal with crashing websites. While the big gathering in the Marvel Cinematic Universe is taking shape, these kinds of gatherings seem to occur every other Tuesday in the comics. Some are more awesome than others and the one that unfolds in “War of the Realms #1” definitely qualifies.

You don’t have to have followed to recent comics to appreciate it, although it certainly helps. The world of Marvel comics is always in flux with respect to the threats the heroes face and the situations in which they find themselves. “War of the Realms #1” is a confluence of compounding factors that started in Thor’s world of gods and mythical monsters. Now, it has erupted to a level that even comic book gods can appreciate.

If you thought Asgard was in a rough place after “Thor Ragnarok,” then you’ll be unpleasantly shocked at how much worse it can get in the comics. However, it’s not solely because of giant fiery monsters set to 70s rock music. It’s largely because Odin, in stark contrast to the charm exuded by Anthony Hopkins, is a divine prick in the comics.

It’s because of him that Asgard is in ruins, much of his fellow gods have abandoned him, and the realms are ripe for invasion. Despite being the All-Father of gods, he’s powerless to stop it and the heroes of Earth/Midgard are the ones who have to fight it. Prick or not, it still makes for a hell of a spectacle that brings out the best in Russell Dauterman’s artwork.

The mystical machinations of the war aren’t overly complex, nor do they need to be. Asgard isn’t a shining bastion of order and stability anymore. That means Frost Giants, Dark Elves, and Trolls are free to organize and invade other realms. Leading the pack is Malekith the Accursed and if you thought he was a push-over in “Thor: The Dark World,” this comic should help shatter that notion.

Far from being the bland throw-away villain in the movie, Malekith is a forced to be reckoned with in “War of the Realms #1.” He has united gods, monsters, and entire races into one massive army right out of J. R. R. Tolkein’s worst nightmare. Now, he leads them into a full-scale invasion of Midgard and the battle that ensues is as epic as anyone could hope for.

It’s not just Avengers who rush to the front lines. We see the likes of Spider-Man, Wolverine, Daredevil, and the Punisher join the chaos. This is not just a battle for the Avengers. This is something that will bring in players from all ends of the Marvel Universe.

Even with the recent Disney/Fox merger closing, this isn’t something we’re going to see in the Marvel Cinematic Universe anytime soon. “War of the Realms #1” offers a taste of just how much bigger the world of Marvel can be when all its iconic characters occupy the same world. Even for those who can barely contain their excitement over “Avengers Endgame,” this comic should give those same fans plenty of possibilities to contemplate.

The underlying plot to “War of the Realms #1” may be basic, but Jason Aaron, who has been the architect of both Thor and the Avengers for years, finds plenty of ways to bring depth to such a colorful clash. He even finds a way to squeeze in a joke about colonoscopies and kidney stones. I promise I’m not making that up.

Much like the movies, there bits of humor that keep things from getting too dire. However, “War of the Realms #1” never feels like a joke or an excuse to see Thor beat up frost giants. Jason Aaron has shown, throughout his run, that he can incorporate layers into mystical, hammer-wielding spectacles. Those layers are definitely there and poised to affect the battle.

How that battle plays out is just starting to unfold. Even though this comic is padded with extra pages to go along with the inflated price, it’s very much a prelude to a much larger conflict. That conflict already has Spider-Man making dirty jokes and Loki getting eaten by a frost giant. If you can’t find entertainment in that, then you’re just being difficult.

Beyond the entertainment value, “War of the Realms #1” offers the kind of high-stakes superhero crossover story that movie fans have only recently come to appreciate while comic fans have been enjoying it for years. While Malekith the Accursed will never be on the same level as Josh Brolin’s Thanos, there’s something to be said about a character who can wage a cosmic war on the entire Marvel Universe.

Whatever your feelings about Malekith, Odin, or Spider-Man’s brand toilet humor, “War of the Realms #1” has plenty to enjoy while also setting up a much larger conflict. It’s a story that gives the superheroes we love a chance to unite, kick ass, and break stuff. It’s stories like that which remind comic fans why New Comic Book Day is truly the best day of the week.

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“The Perfect Anniversary Present” A Sexy Short Story

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The following is a sexy short story that was inspired by a couple I know who recently celebrated their wedding anniversary. I won’t go so far as to say this is based on a true story, but it certainly was inspired by one. If you’re married or have a lover you want to surprise on your anniversary, feel free to use this idea. Enjoy!

“Come on, Tim! How much longer are you going to make me wait?” complained an impatient, but excited Amber Deegan.

“Just hang in there, babe. I promise this is worth waiting for!” said Tim Deegan, her playful, but cunning husband.

Amber didn’t know what to expect. It was their first wedding anniversary, an event she’d intended to celebrate. However, she had a feeling Tim wouldn’t be content with a romantic dinner, a quiet night, and some tender lovemaking. That just wasn’t the kind of man he was, nor was it the kind of man she’d married.

Just a few minutes ago, they’d finished a big meal in which Amber recreated the first meal they’d shared on their first date, which consisted of burgers and nachos drenched with her family’s spicy salsa. Tim, not content with candles and classical music, set up a miniature disco ball and played the fast-paced dance music they’d heard when they first met at her best friend’s birthday party. It was not a typical anniversary dinner and it got even less typical when it ended.

Almost immediately after they finished their meal, Tim turned the music off and got dead serious. He claimed he had the perfect anniversary present for her, but it required that she wear a blindfold and follow him. It wasn’t the weirdest request Tim had made. It wasn’t even the only one involving a blindfold, having not forgotten the antics they enjoyed on their honeymoon.

That didn’t make Amber any less curious. She even felt a little anxious, knowing her husband had a knack for elaborate schemes. She didn’t mind, though. If anything, she found that kind of uncertainty a turn-on. It was a big part of why her relationship with Tim was so strong. He always found ways to keep things exciting, even after four years together, one of which they’d spent married.

“This past year has been the happiest year of my life, Amber,” he told her as he carefully led her forward. “I know I’ve said that a lot this past week, but I mean it. Marrying you, building a life together, and sharing so many wonderful moments together…I could try putting it into words until our next anniversary and that still wouldn’t be enough.”

“Aww! That’s so lovingly sweet,” Amber said as she followed closely, “and you say you’re so bad with words.”

“It’s true. It’s not just because I flunked English in high school, either. I’ve always been the kind of guy who prefers letting his actions do the talking. It’s part of what makes me so good at building things and working in art studios. It’s also why I thought I’d never get married.”

“You really think a guy who’s both physical and artistic wouldn’t attract any women?” Amber teased.

“Not the kind who’d fall in love with me, let alone marry me. Then, you came along. You saw who I was, how I was, and what I am…and you just accepted all of it. You gave me a chance to show you how much I can love someone.”

“And you showed me plenty,” she said. “That’s exactly why I married you.”

“And now, I want to show you how grateful I am. I want you to see, clear as day, how much our love means me to me.”

His words were cryptic, but his voice was as heart-felt as it had been on their wedding day. It got Amber’s heart racing, along with her passions. Tim might not have been skilled with turning feelings into words, but the man had a knack for conveying his love to her. It left her all the more anxious to see what kind of surprise he had in store for her.

She kept following him, not once touching the blindfold he’d put over her eyes. Knowing the layout of their house as well as him, she sensed they were in their second-floor master bedroom. She even suspected that Tim had led her in circles a few times in an attempt to throw her off. She still went along with it. Her husband wasn’t big on subtlety, but he always rewarded her patience and trust.

“Stand here,” Tim said, finally stopping her.

“Is the blindfold really necessary?” Amber said. “I can tell we’re in our bedroom.”

“Trust me. It’s necessary,” he told her. “I want the moment to be just right. It’s the only way I’ll ever make clear how much I love you and how happy I am to call you my wife.”

“You almost make it sound like a life-or-death situation,” she pointed out.

“When it comes to showing my love for my wife, it’s pretty damn close,” he replied, “which is why I need you to trust me because the next part…it’s going to get intense.”

He still sounded very serious, but he also sounded distinctly seductive. He had that deep, masculine undertone he often used when trying to get her in a sexy mood. Other women thought it was juvenile, including her sister and mother. She thought it was hot and on their anniversary, it did plenty to set the mood.

Her anticipation growing by the second, Amber stood firmly in place, still sensing the carpet of their bedroom under her feet and her husband’s powerful hands on her shoulders. Even through the blindfold, she felt his penetrating gaze. It got her heart racing and her passions heightened, wanting more than anything to feel whatever intensity Tim had planned.

“Okay, Tim,” Amber said, matching his voice with some seduction of her own. “I trust you completely. Tell me what to do next.”

“Good, because the next part is critical,” he said.

As he uttered those words, she felt his hands shift from her shoulders to her waist. There, he lightly grasped the hem of her shirt.

“Take your clothes off,” Tim said.

“My clothes?” she said, a mix of surprise and intrigue. “You mean down to my underwear? Or everything?”

“Everything,” he affirmed, “and keep the blindfold on.”

His voice left no room for ambiguity. He wanted her naked and not just because he liked staring at her tits and butt. His reasons remained unclear, but Amber hadn’t forgotten what she just promised.

“Okay. Everything, it is,” Amber said coyly, “but if I find out there’s a video camera in front of me, you’re a dead man.”

“Don’t worry. It’s just us,” Tim told her. “If it makes you feel better, I’m taking my clothes off too.”

“Is that part of your elaborate plan?”

“You want me to tell you know? Or do you want to get naked and find out?”

“Tough choice,” she teased. “Well, these clothes were getting itchy anyways!”

With almost casual glee, Amber stripped out of her shirt, jeans, and underwear. Tim still helped her get her shirt off over the blindfold, but she did the rest, slipping out of her pants and unclasping her bra.

As she kicked off her clothes, she sensed Tim do the same, hearing as he undid his belt buckle and slid off his shirt. There was something inherently sexy about not being able to see him undress, but know he was standing there, naked as he’d been on their honeymoon. She even got a little turned on, knowing his eyes were drifting up and down her naked body. She could already feel his gaze on her breasts. She could even hear his breath getting more labored as he took in her beauty.

“God, you look good naked,” he told her.

“Your way with words continues to astonish,” Amber joked with folded arms. “Now, tell me what’s next so I actually enjoy being naked with my husband.”

He laughed and pulled her into a light embrace. In the process, he revealed that he was fully naked too. She could feel his exposed chest pressing against hers. She also felt a partially-erect penis press up against her thigh. That somewhat surprised her. Naked or not, him getting aroused so quickly meant something had gotten him very excited.

Whatever it was, Tim clearly wanted her. One way or another, they were going to make love that night. It was only a matter of what form it would take.

“To the bed,” he whispered into her ear, giving her butt a playful squeeze in the process.

“Lead the way, dear husband of mine,” Amber said curtly.

Still in his arms, her love guided her across the room. It couldn’t have been far, given the size of their room, but it might as well have been a journey to the other side of the world.

With every step, he affectionately caressed her naked body. He kissed down her neck, nibbling her ear in that special way that always got her blood flowing to all the right body parts. He also trailed his hands up her hips, tickling and tantalizing her feminine curves, sending shivers up her body. After only a few steps, those shivers morphed into full-fledged arousal.

“Just a little bit closer,” Tim whispered, just as he slipped his fingers between her legs. “We’re almost there.”

“Ooh, Tim!” Amber cooed. “You’re not making this easy for me.”

“And for good reason…one that’ll make sense very soon.”

By the time they finally reached the bed, her husband’s skilled touching had left her feeling very moist between her legs. Tim had grown quite skilled at making her horny in the time they’d been together, but he was really going the extra mile. The way his fingers grazed over her outer folds, paying close attention to her more sensitive areas, made clear that he needed her horny for what he had planned.

“Get on,” he told her intently.

Already short of breath and very much aroused, Amber followed her husband’s urgings and crawled up onto the bed. Tim did so as well, his hands never leaving her naked body. With the blindfold still on, he guided her to towards the center of the bed and laid her down atop what she surmised to be a fresh pillow. In fact, the sheets under her felt brand new and very expensive.

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say we’re in the same bed I woke up in this morning,” Amber pointed out, “but something feels different.”

“That’s because it is,” he said, still speaking in his extra-manly voice. “You’re about to find out just how different, but only when the moment is perfect.”

“And when might that be? This blindfold is getting annoying.”

“We’re almost there. Trust me, you’ll know when the moment is perfect and why.”

Still trusting her husband implicitly, Amber waited with baited breath as she lay naked atop her bed, soft linens under her and her equally-naked husband on top of her. As she waited, he kissed and caressed her again.

He trailed one hand up her hips and fondled her breast with the other, giving it a light squeeze to send more intimate shivers coursing up through her body. He lovingly twirled his tongue with hers every step of the way, as if to mimic the same deep kiss they’d shared on their wedding day. It got her heart racing while sending her lady parts into overdrive. The line between loving the man on top of her and wanting to fuck him senseless completely disappeared.

“Spread your legs,” he whispered. “It won’t be much longer.”

“Damn, I don’t know how much more I can take!” Amber gasped.

Like a reflex, her legs parted and Tim got into position between them. She soon felt the tip of his erect penis rub up against her folds. He was almost as aroused as her. Hatching elaborate schemes with her had always been a turn-on, but whatever he’d done had really raised the bar.

Her patience almost at her limit, Amber felt her husband grab her thighs, lay on top of her, and thrust his member into her womanhood. The feeling of smooth, sensual penetration quickly filled her body. As she gasped at the sudden surge of sensations, Tim buried his face in her neck and whispered once more.

“Now…take it off,” he said.

Amber couldn’t remove the blindfold fast enough. As soon as it was off, she saw something that left her utterly astonished in the best possible way.

“Oh my God!” she exclaimed. “Tim…you wonderfully devious man!”

“Happy anniversary, my love.”

It was a sight to behold in the best possible way. On the ceiling just above their bed, which had been blank and featureless that morning, a mirror had been installed. It was not a small mirror, either. It was big enough to show the entire king-sized bed and at that very moment, their naked bodies were on full display in the reflection.

“Wow!” Amber said in daze of amazement. “It’s us…in bed…making love.”

As she gazed at the reflection, Tim went to work establishing a heated sexual rhythm. Grunting with unfretted manliness, he dug his knees and feet into the bed as he worked his body against hers. Manly sinews grinded against feminine curves, her breasts pressing up against his chest in a perfect mesh of flesh. With every movement, his rigid manhood sensually slithered within her wet folds, stimulating all the right nerves and filling her with the bliss of shared passion.

It was one thing to feel those wondrous pleasures that came from making love to her husband, but it was quite another to see it play out in front of her in real time. Their reflection on the mirror was the ultimate porno with them as the stars, turning an intimate feeling into an intensely erotic spectacle.

Amber’s gaze remained fixated on that spectacle, watching as her husband thrust and humped with affectionate delight. Along with the visuals, she felt the steady stream of ecstasy that came with good sex and a caring lover. There was something strange, yet stimulating about watching it unfold before her eyes. Like a fantasy manifesting, it added something special to their lovemaking…something that translated into a special brand of bliss.

“Mmm…Tim!” Amber moaned. “Oh…oohhh yes! Like that…do it like that!”

“Oohhh Amber!” Tim grunted through his hungry humping. “You like…what you see?”

“Yes! Fuck yes, I love it!” she said without hesitation.

There was literally no denying. She could see it right there in the mirror, the way her expression beamed with joy. Tim seemed intent on intensifying the spectacle. His face still buried in her neck, he kissed up the side of her face as he worked his hips harder, vigorously pumping his manhood into her depths.

Amber got into the act as well, raking her nails over his lover’s back and spreading her legs wider, showing off her uncanny flexibility. It played out in every lurid detail in the mirror. She watched their naked bodies rock together in an intimate heat, the bed moving with it. She’d expected to make love to her husband on their first anniversary at some point. Being able to actually see it and commit it to memory made it even more memorable.

“It’s so beautiful,” Amber mused in the heat of passion, “Me…my husband…making love…so beautiful.”

She kept watching and Tim kept the show going, maintaining a steady pace to really draw it out. He employed many of those special tricks he often used to bring her to orgasm, like nibbling on her ear and squeezing her butt. Even during one of his elaborate schemes, Tim made the extra effort to please her. That didn’t just make him a great husband. It made her a very lucky, very grateful woman.

Those tactics weren’t necessary to get her to the brink. She was already very close, ready to have the best orgasm she’d had since her honeymoon. He held back for her, but she didn’t. It was going to happen. She was going to have an orgasm and she was going to watch it unfold before her eyes.

“Ohhh I’m coming, my love! I…I’m coming!” Amber panted.

“That’s it! Watch yourself come!” Tim urged.

He delivered a few more targeted thrusts, penetrating deep to hit those extra sensitive nerves that only a dedicated husband could reach. It did the trick. She climaxed under her husband and the ceiling mirror captured every intricate detail.

Like wave crashing over her, a flood of ecstasy washed over her body. Keeping her eyes open was a challenge, but she made sure they never closed for long. She wanted to see the culmination of their lovemaking. What she saw was a unique kind of beauty.

Her body arched, her nails dug into her lover’s shoulders, and her toes curled as she contorted to the feeling. However, it was the look on her face that stood out the most. The beaming expression of orgasmic delight was there for her to see. She thought the photos of her wedding day showed a very happy woman. The face of a woman making love to her husband definitely raised the bar.

It felt like the longest orgasm she’d ever had. That, or seeing herself climax just made it seem longer. Whatever the case, she soaked in every last drop of ecstasy. Tim even ceased his movements, letting her take in the sight. After it passed, she finally diverted her gaze from the mirror and looked into the eyes of her wonderful husband.

“I love you, Tim,” she told him.

“I love you too, my beautiful wife,” Tim replied, “and for once, you can see how much I love you.”

“Yes…I can,” Amber said with a humored grin. “For our first anniversary, it’s the perfect present…one I’ll have a hard time returning.”

“I’m sure you’ll think of something.”

“What makes you say I haven’t?”

Now, it was Tim’s turn to be surprised. Amber flashed him another seductive glance. She was still swimming in a sea of orgasmic delight, but she wasn’t done celebrating their first anniversary. She also hadn’t forgotten that Tim was still hard and hadn’t climaxed yet. Being the loving wife she was, she had every intention of rectifying that.

“It’s time for you to trust me, this time,” she told him. “Think you can do that?”

“Of course, I can,” Tim said with his typical confidence.

“Good! Then, lie down on your back and enjoy the show. I’m going to ride your dick so good you’ll want to marry me all over again!”

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How To Make A Man Feel Loved

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People seek out love. Whether you’re a man, woman, transgender, or just anyone with human emotions, we have an inherent drive to connect with one another. Whether it’s emotional or physical, we are wired to desire such intimate connections. It’s an integral part of being human.

I suspect most reasonable people would agree with that sentiment. Humans are social creatures. Both science and general experience make that abundantly clear. The disagreements tend to occur on the nature, process, and exercise of those intimate bonds. What some think of as love may come off as obsession to someone else. I’ve tried to be mindful of that difference, both within real and fictional romance.

Things only get trickier when you apply gender differences to the concept of seeking love. In a perfect world, there would be no differences, but we don’t live in that world. In today’s complicated web of social norms, traditions, gender politics, stereotypes, and taboos, how you go about pursuing love and feeling loved varies considerably by gender.

Now, I can’t speak to how women or those who identify as transgender approach that process. I am a heterosexual man. I can only speak to my own experiences, some of which I’ve shared in the past. I certainly can’t claim to speak for all men, either. Everyone is different, complete with their own romantic quirks and kinks.

However, in contemplating various gender issues and social taboos, I feel like there’s a growing disconnect surrounding the idea of masculinity, being in love, and what it means to feel loved. Some of that has to do with the current state of identity politics and loaded terms like “toxic masculinity,” a concept I’ve done plenty to criticize before. Other issues, I believe, run much deeper.

For me, being the self-admitted romantic I am, it comes back to what it means to feel loved. People can argue what love is until the end of time. I’ll leave those discussions to smarter, more capable individuals with a better understanding of philosophy. Instead, I want to focus on what it means for men, in general, to feel loved.

As a man with a modest amount of romantic experience, I think men are held to a very different standard. Some of it isn’t fair, but women and transgender individuals can probably make that same claim. With men, I believe those standards are rarely scrutinized and easily misconstrued.

To understand how, you need only refer to Chris Rock’s

2018 Netflix special, “Tamborine.” In it, he made this memorable observation about men and how they are loved.

“Only women, children, and dogs are loved unconditionally. Men are loved under the condition that they provide something.”

In addition to being both hilarious and insightful, this sentiment reflects the unique challenges that men face when it comes to love. It’s not always overt and oftentimes, it’s inadvertent. Some of these issues are just woven into social norms that go back to certain pre-modern traditions about family structure.

Whatever their source, society never stops evolving. How people interact and relate to one another will keep adapting to changing circumstances and make no mistake, those circumstances will change rapidly in the coming years. That’s going to impact how men, women, and everyone in between relates to one another and not always for the better.

With that in mind, I’d like to start a discussion on what men seek in pursuing love and how to go about making men feel loved. I know the media, popular culture, and even a recent movie centered around men’s thoughts have given us many impressions. In the interest of streamlining the discussion, I’d like to offer a brief list of insights and approaches for making a man feel loved.

Again, this list is hardly definitive. I’m just one heterosexual man. I’m sure there are plenty of other men out there with different experiences who can offer far greater insights. If you’d like to share those insights, please post them in the comments. For now, here are just a few small ways to help a man feel loved and inspire him to love others.


Make His Efforts And Contributions Feel Valued (And Not Just Expected)

This one is subtle, but powerful. Watch any sitcom, from “Married With Children” to “Leave It To Beaver,” and the man of the family is usually the sole provider. Regardless of how you feel about this family structure, be it a hallmark of tradition or a byproduct of a patriarchal conspiracy, the sentiment comes off as more of an assumption rather than a contribution.

Even if a man works his ass off every day, whether it’s digging ditches or selling women’s shoes like Al Bundy, that work isn’t always valued. It’s just expected. It’s just what a man is supposed to do. Him wanting any other kind of affirmation is just seen as excessive or a byproduct of a fragile male ego. However, such assumptions only breed resentment.

In almost any other situation, we seek and hope for acknowledgement of our sacrifices. We want our labor, be it physical or emotional, to feel valued. It’s part of being a social species and is not contingent on gender. A man isn’t going to feel loved if what he contributes is always taken for granted.

It doesn’t have to be glowing praise. It just has to be an acknowledgement of his efforts. That makes him feel good about the contributions he makes and will only make him work harder at returning the favor, which is good for any healthy love.


Treat Him As A Partner And Not An Asset

This idea manifests in many ways, the most obvious being instances of women seeking men for the sole purpose of gaining access to their money and resources. This sort of thing isn’t new. That kind of power dynamic goes back to ancient times when wealthy kings saw women as assets just as much as they saw his wealth as an asset.

We don’t live in ancient times anymore. While we still have rich men using their wealth to hook up with beautiful women, this issue often arises among those who are not rich. Relationships may start out as loving and intimate, but can descend into a bland business partnership where the man is nothing more than a buffer against poverty.

It’s true that a man can bring things like money, resources, and the siring children to a relationship. However, that can’t be the only things of value. If men are reduced to just the things they do, then they’re not going to feel loved. They’re going to feel like a tool, one who can be easily replaced by anyone of greater means.

That’s often why men get concerned, jealous, or even paranoid when their lover treats them more like a tradeable asset rather than an equal partner. Even those who champion equality often fall into a trap that focuses only on the tangible components of that relationship. Since love is inherently intangible, it can leave things feeling unbalanced.


Don’t Treat His Interests And Hobbies As Stupid Or Juvenile

When it comes to men’s interests, there’s often a sense that they’re always immature or crude. Sports, video games, and comic books are seen as something for children. Mature men are expected to outgrow them and embrace other interests more befitting of adults. However, it’s often the case that those interests align with those favored by women.

People have all sorts of hobbies, be it watching football, building birdhouses, or trash talking one another while playing video games. While some are healthier than others, denigrating them just sends the message that you want men to build their interests around you. It’s akin to wanting them to want to do the dishes rather than just doing the dishes. One requires courtesy. The other requires the thought police.

All good relationships require some level of sacrifice, but when one side is expected to sacrifice something they love and cherish, it gives the impression that they’re not loved for who they are. They’re only loved for what someone else wants them to be. It also implies that the only way for men to love someone is for them to make their significant other the center of their world.

That may count as romance in a fairy tale, but in the real world, that’s dangerously close to obsession. Most men seeking love aren’t looking for that kind of relationship. They’re seeking someone who will love them for who they are, which includes their hobbies.

That doesn’t mean you have to share in those hobbies. If you do, that’s a nice bonus. That shouldn’t be a deal-breaker, though. A man who can keep loving the things he loves and share some of that love with someone else is going to make him that much more appreciative.


Don’t Assume He Can/Should Fix Everything

When your car breaks down, you take it to a mechanic. When your toilet backs up, you call a plumber. Most people don’t give that a second thought. The fact that many mechanics and plumbers are men is beside the point, although I’m sure that colors our perceptions about what people who fix things look like.

In any relationship, things are going to break. That’s just life. However, when the burden of fixing everything falls on the man, it creates another imbalance that can compound a bad situation.

Regardless of whether you think men are more inclined to fix things, just assuming that they can further reduces a relationship to roles. If you’re the man, you fix things. It’s not always appliances, either. If someone is upset, the man is supposed to fix it. If something goes wrong, the man is supposed to resolve it.

If a good relationship is supposed to be a partnership, then this dynamic is hardly equal. One side can’t be solely responsible for resolving every problem, be it a faulty garbage disposal or serious intimacy issues. Being in love and making your partner feel loved goes both ways. Expecting only one side to get their hands dirty and make the sacrifices isn’t going to leave someone feeling appreciated, let alone loved.


Make Your Love Feel Like A Choice Rather Than A Favor

I’ve heard more than one women, and even a few men, tell their partners they’re lucky to have them. It’s not always in a condescending sort of way, but by definition, it kind of is. It sends the message that the love they’re sharing isn’t really a matter of choice. It’s just a favor they’re giving to someone, one that can be revoked at any time.

That kind of a relationship is many things, but it is not very loving. Men jump through a lot of hoops to be with someone. I know women have challenges as well, but in the current gender climate, men are still the ones who do most of the pursuing and women are the ones making the choices. Just look at the gender disparity on dating sites for proof of that.

As a result, a relationship will feel more like a privilege than a genuine, emotional connection. It creates this dynamic where a man feels like he has to navigate a constantly-shifting set of expectations, just to keep the relationship going. The woman is the one who sets those expectations and can determine at any moment that he has failed and the relationship is over.

Again, I’m not claiming that this is how most women approach a relationship. By and large, the love they feel is real. However, a good chunk of that love is contingent on the men treating that love as a favor that is granted rather than something that’s genuine and sincere. As Chris Rock said, it’s a conditional kind of love and that love will limit any relationship in the long run.


I hope this list helps further the discussion surrounding men, love, and relationships. If you feel like I missed something or need to expand on a particular concept, please let me know in the comments. For everyone out there lucky enough to be in relationships, I hope this gives you something to think about and provides tools with which you can use to make one another feel truly loved.

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Happy April Fools Day (And A Warning)

Yes, it’s April Fool’s Day.

No, that’s not a holiday.

No, I didn’t write a sexy short story about it.

I don’t take this day seriously, but I know a number of people do. Some do it better than most. I even recounted one such story. Sadly, those stories aren’t as common as I wished.

Instead, April Fool’s Day has become one of those days where the news is even less trustworthy than usual and the dumbest crap goes viral for the stupidest possible reasons. It’s a crazy excuse for a non-holiday, is what I’m saying.

I’m still going to try and treat it like a serious day. I’ve still got stuff to write and sexy stories to tell. That said, I urge everyone to exercise extra caution on a day like today. Between the news having little credibility these days and too many people eager for a cheap laugh, there won’t be any shortage of jokes and pranks.

Now, with the exception of a new “Rick and Morty” episode, there’s not much that can make this day anything other than a bad joke. Please keep that in mind and be a little more vigilant about what you take seriously today.

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Jack Fisher’s Sexy Sunday Thoughts: Spring Showers Edition

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As I’m writing this, it’s pouring rain outside. A month ago, that would’ve been a good excuse to be lazy and moody. Rain in the middle of winter is like expired milk when you already have the stomach flu. It doesn’t necessarily cause your miserable mindset, but it certainly compounds them. However, rain in the spring is different.

I’ve always found rain during this time of year to have a unique beauty and not just because it washes the pollen off the trees, much to the benefit of my allergies. There’s actually something sensual about it and I’m far from the first person to notice that. After a cold, barren winter, the rain comes along to fertilize a landscape eager to bloom. You don’t need a dirty imagination to see the sexy connotations.

Rain in spring is like foreplay for summer. It helps gets a world that has been barren, isolated, and lonely for too long in a more intimate mood. Coincidentally, the warmer temperatures and brighter spirits also encourage more people to wear less clothing, which is something an aspiring erotica romance writer can appreciate.

This is the time of year where we can sense warmer and sexier times ahead of us. Rain is just a tease, but a tantalizing one. This latest batch of my Sexy Sunday Thoughts should help add some more overt forms of teasing to complement the rain. Enjoy!


“A honeymoon is the closest most couples will come to living in a real-life porno.”


“The worst blowjob you’ve ever had is still better than the kiss you’ve ever had.”


“To some extent, every romantic gesture is an attempt to convince someone to get naked for you.”


“Intense fighting and intense lovemaking are equally capable of destroying furniture.”


“In some respects, jealousy is anger over stolen orgasms.”


“Your genitals won’t tell you when you’re falling in love, but they will sound the alarm.”


“Finding ways to please your lover was very likely the first use of the scientific method.”


Whether it’s raining or not, winter is on its way out. Better weather is fast approaching. It’s been a long, bitter winter for many of us. We’re ready for weather that doesn’t require dressing in layers. A nice bit of rain to wash away what’s left of the snow is a promising sign that warmer, sexier times are almost upon us.

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My Wedding Speech: Love, Marriage, And Hope

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The following is a little speech I prepared for the wedding I’m set to attend later today. As I announced yesterday, I’m currently out of town to attend a wedding involving a close family member of mine. I’m not the one that’s getting married, but being the romantic I am, I have a strong appreciation for weddings.

There is sure to be plenty of joy to be had on all sides. There will be plenty of speeches, toasts, and tears. I don’t know if I’ll get a chance to say anything, given the size of the crowd. However, I’ve never been good at giving big speeches anyways. My strength has always been the written word.

With that in mind, I’d like to share a little speech that I wrote for this momentous occasion. Even if I don’t get a chance to say it, I hope to forward it to friends, family, and loved ones so they can share in the sentiment during and after the ceremony. Also, if you or someone you know is getting married and need something romantic to say, please feel free to use this.

What can we say about love that hasn’t been demonstrated, expressed, or put into every other pop song in history?

What can we possibly do, by ourselves and with each other, to demonstrate the power of this feeling?

On this joyous day, I think we can skip those questions because what we’re experiencing right now is the most complete answer we’re ever going to get. Here, in this moment, we are feeling those magical, intangible things that unite us all, but defy description.

Take a moment, every one of you, to appreciate this feeling. To the bride and groom, take an extra moment or several. Can you sense it? Can you grasp it, if only in though? It doesn’t have to be tangible. It doesn’t even have to be complete. All that matters is that it’s there.

Take another moment, if you can, to understand how powerful a feeling it takes to bring us together. What other emotion can inspire an event like this? Friends, family, and loved ones from all over are here to share in this experience. Some say love is magical. I say magic has nothing on love’s ability to bring us all together.

To the bride and groom, whose love brought us here, you’ve achieved something that few can hope to grasp. What brought you to this point wasn’t just a passing feeling. A simple passion may inspire a kiss or a smile, but it takes something much greater to create something like this.

Your love is something special. It’s not just one particular feeling at one particular moment in time. It is a process and an evolution. Like gravity or the changing of the seasons, love has been the catalyst through which you’ve weaved your lives together. The hopes of the past are now the promises of the future. The joy you feel now is the foundation for greater joy in the future.

When we truly love someone, we don’t just love the person before us. Their body, their smile, and the things they do for us are merely the surface of something much deeper.

To love someone is to love who they’re trying to be.

To love someone is to love who you’re trying to be, as well.

To feel that love and know it is a moment worth capturing. For you to share that moment with us, giving us a chance to see and marvel at what you’ve achieved together, is a true wonder.

Having witnessed your love and celebrated your new life together, I think we can all say without reservation that love is real. We need ask no more questions. We need not contemplate any more factors. Seeing you together and sharing in the moment is all we need to know the truth.

From this day forward, through every challenge and triumph, we wish you all the love and happiness that this feeling can bring. From here on out, let love be your guide, your bond, and your greatest strength.

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About To Get On A Plane For A Wedding (Not Mine)

To all those who loyally and regularly follow this site, I’m sorry to say that I don’t have any daily sexy musings, sexy short stories, or long rants about absurd social media trends. However, I have a good reason for it.

In a just bit, I’ll be getting on a plane to head up north for a wedding. It’s not mine. Trust me, I would’ve written a lot more about it if it were. A close family member of mine is getting married and I’ve got relatives coming in from all over to join the party. It promises to be a eventful, joyous affair. That means my ability to write the sexy stuff that makes this site move will be limited.

Don’t worry, though. Weddings and elaborate family affairs have a keen way of inspiring me. I promise I’ll try to make use of that inspiration at some point. For now, I’m just going to download some comics, kick back, and enjoy my flight. Rest assured, the sexy and awesome content will resume in due time.

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DNA Testing, Family Secrets, And Revealing Truths About Infidelity

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What if you woke up one day and found out your father wasn’t actually your biological father?

What if you woke up one day and found out your kids weren’t actually your biological kids?

For a growing number of people, this isn’t just a distressing hypothetical. It’s a painfully real scenario. Secrets that were once easy to keep are now coming to light, thanks to a mix of curiosity, advancing technology, and simple economics. It’s causing a lot of distress for a lot of people, but the fact that it’s happening is somewhat telling.

To understand it, it’s necessary to understand just how unprecedented this situation is. Until very recently, getting a DNA test was exceedingly expensive. Go back 25 years when the Human Genome Project was just getting underway and just sequencing one person’s DNA cost millions. Then, thanks to advances in sequencing techniques and computing technology, the cost fell rapidly.

Today, sequencing your DNA costs less than $1,000. If you just want to test your ancestry, that’s even cheaper with kits costing around $100. You don’t need a court order or contacts at the FBI. You just need a spare $100 and a willingness to spit in a tube. It may not seem like much, but make no mistake. This is uncharted territory for our species and our society.

Ever since we structured our civilization around agriculture, passing down property through generations, and building more diverse societies, there has been a strong incentive to know that your children are biologically yours. This is where taboos surrounding virginity and female chastity come from. For centuries, the best way to assure your kids were yours was for your bride to be a virgin on her wedding night.

However, even in those limited circumstances, it was entirely possible to get around them. The traditional practices of testing young women for virginity are both invasive and prone to major error. If a woman is cunning enough, she can beat those tests and get away with lying about her sexual history. Men could be just as effective about hiding affairs that may have resulted in children with other women.

Now, hiding the truth isn’t just harder in the era of the internet and social media. Certain lies can no longer remain hidden. You can claim videos are deep fakes and that pictures had been Photoshopped. You can’t make those kinds of excuses when the truth is literally written in someone’s DNA.

Sometimes, the truth is just shocking. Take the story of Dani Shapiro, who found out that the man she’d loved and cherished as her father was not related to her. It wasn’t because of her mother’s infidelity, though. It was because her parents utilized an old infertility treatment that resulted in her being conceived with doner sperm instead of that of her surrogate father.

In other cases, the truth can be devastating, such as the case of Sarah Zhang, who found out that rumors of her mother having an affair with a restaurant owner were all too true. This revelation was heartbreaking. In an instant, her entire identity and sense of self had been uprooted. This is how she described the difficulty processing this information.

When I first found out the news, I considered taking a leave of absence from work, because I had difficulty focusing on anything else besides the revelation from 23andMe. On a hard day, I feel heartbroken about my mom’s secret. Her illness created an intimacy between us in the final months of her life and I felt that we were able to tell each other all the things in our heart. This news taints that memory and created a fresh bout of grieving about her death.

These stories are harrowing and they’re becoming increasingly common. There’s even a support group on Facebook for people who learn from these testing kits that their heritage isn’t what they’d previously thought. It’s hard to understand what these people are going through, living their whole lives thinking they know who their parents are, only to find out it wasn’t true.

As DNA testing kits continue to get cheaper and more prevalent, there’s a good chance there are plenty more cases like this just waiting to be uncovered. The fact that it seems to be happening so much says more about our species and our society than it does about the technology behind it.

Think, for a moment, about all the families who lived in the era before this technology became available. How many of those families had secrets like the ones Dani Shapiro and Sarah Zhang later uncovered? How many fathers unknowingly raised children that weren’t biologically theirs? How many mothers birthed children who were sired by someone other than their spouse?

It’s impossible to know for sure and the fact that it was impossible for most of human history might be just as telling as any family secret. I’ve mentioned before at how our notions of traditional romance and family have significant flaws. We value and idealize monogamy and fidelity, but the fact that we go to such extremes to favor it seems to imply that there’s something untenable about it.

Promiscuity and infidelity have existed in every human society. There’s a reason why even ancient civilizations had laws and traditions regulating marriage, adultery, and divorce. Even when there are serious consequences, people still did it. The fact that some of the punishments were so severe imply that a lot of people were getting away with it.

Even so, this didn’t stop men from raising children as their own. It didn’t stop women from loving their children and their spouses all the same. The fact that it was so hard to determine someone’s heritage might have even helped our species from an evolutionary standpoint.

A big part of what makes humans such a successful species is our ability to form tribes, cooperate, and coordinate towards a common goal. In old hunter/gatherer societies, close-knit tribes weren’t quite as concerned about the paternity of their kids. They took a more communal approach to family. Logistically, they had to. They needed that level of cooperation to survive in a harsh, unforgiving world.

Given that humanity spent most of its history in this hunter/gatherer structure, the forces of evolution are already working against those seeking parental certainty. The rise of civilization complicated things, but not to an extent that people couldn’t get away with fooling around. The fact that the average number of sexual partners for people these days is more than one only reveals that the inclinations is definitely there.

That’s an important factor to remember because as DNA testing becomes easier and cheaper, it won’t be possible to avoid the implications. People cheat. People keep secrets. People lie to their kids, sometimes without knowing it. For the most part, it hasn’t affected our ability to function as families and a society. Whether the emerging truth written within our DNA changes that remains to be seen.

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Jack Fisher’s Weekly Quick Pick Comic: Detective Comics #1000

Every Wednesday, a new batch of comics enters this world and makes it a little more awesome. However, it’s not every week that an iconic character achieves an incredible milestone that only one other superhero comic has achieved to date. There aren’t a lot of characters who could hope to achieve such ratified status, but if ever there were someone equipped for that journey, it’s Batman.

Today will likely go down in history as one of Batman’s greatest triumphs and he achieves it without the aid of Christopher Nolan. That’s because on this day, Detective Comics #1000 came out. Beyond just being a landmark issue that celebrates the legacy of Dark Knight, this comic helps remind superhero fans of every generation why Batman has endured.

From the triumph of “The Dark Knight” to the lasting damage done by Joel Shumacher, Batman has navigated many eras over the years. However, like Superman and Wonder Woman, he has never deviated far from his core persona. He’s a detective, a symbol, and a personification of vengeance against egregious injustice. No matter the time, place, or culture, there’s always room for that kind of crusade.

Detective Comics #1000 helps affirm that by telling a collection of short stories by some of DC Comics’ top writers. None of these stories really tie into one another and they don’t have to. It’s just not possible to capture the breadth of Batman’s legacy in just one story, no matter how many members of his iconic rogues gallery enter the picture.

Instead, each story is crafted in a way that helps capture a critical element of Batman’s never-ending crusade. A story by Scott Snyder helps highlight Batman’s unparalleled detective skills. A story by Warren Ellis highlights Batman’s ability to strike fear in criminals. A story by Christopher Priest show show Batman’s humanity is as strong as any one of his skills.

Each story carries its own weight, in terms of drama and impact. They present some of Batman’s best traits alongside his greatest weaknesses. They never give the impression that Batman is too powerful or too capable. At the end of the day, he’s still human. He has very human vulnerabilities and not just compared to the heavy hitters of the Justice League.

Beyond not being bulletproof, there are many instances that show he’s still someone who was deeply scarred as a child. The murder of his parents still haunts him. There are times in which he fails to cope with it, as nicely shown in a story by Denny O’Neil. At the same time, however, that loss and the pain it causes still drives him to be Batman.

In many respects, Batman is more true to his persona than Bruce Wayne. If anything, Bruce Wayne is the real mask. When he’s not wearing his cowl, he has to be someone else. He has to give the impression that he’s a successful, functional adult who got over the murder of his parents long ago. That has never been the case for Batman.

After 1,000 issues of Detective Comics, it’s abundantly clear that Batman does not see injustice the same way others do. People suffer tragedy and injustice all the time, both in the world of superhero comics and in the real world. Most people are content to let the authorities and the justice system deal with it. Batman isn’t most people.

In his world, the crime-ridden metaphor that is Gotham City, the authorities are corrupt and the system is flawed. Unlike people of lesser means, he’s in a position to actually do something about injustice. As Bruce Wayne, he can help improve the economy of the city. As Batman, though, he can make it so other children don’t have to watch their parents die.

It’s a powerful message full of powerful themes. They’re as relevant today as they were 80 years ago when Bob Kane and Bill Finger first created Batman. Injustice and tragedy know no single time, race, culture, or gender. They affect everyone and Batman stands on the front lines to fight it.

More than anything else, Detective Comics #1000 reminds us of why we want Batman on the front lines of that crusade. He’s capable of confronting the worst of the worst in terms of criminals. He’s also compassionate enough to understand and empathize with those who have been affected by injustice. It’s how he’s able to recruit and inspire others like Robin, Nightwing, Batgirl, and Catwoman.

Over the years, he’s even managed to carve out an extended Batman family, of sorts. It’s not the same as the family he lost, but an incredibly touching story by Tom King and Tony Daniels shows just how much it means to him. It helps give balance to someone who can be a hardened crime-fighter one moment and a caring friend the next.

Not all the stories in Detective Comics #1000 are so serious and dramatic. The story by Paul Dini provides some colorful humor that shows that even the gritty world of Batman isn’t prone to a few absurdities. Batman himself doesn’t deny this. He just embraces and accepts it as part of his never-ending crusade.

It’s hard to imagine any crusade lasting 1,000 issues and spanning eight decades, complete with campy TV shows and genre-defining movies. The universal nature of Batman’s crusade against injustice helped fill those issues with so many iconic moments. This landmark issue shows why that crusade is poised to endure another 1,000 issues.

The struggle never ends, but he never gives up. He can’t and he won’t. He’s the goddamn Batman.

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