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Sexy Sunday Thoughts: Infinity War Edition

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I hope it goes without saying to my fellow comic book fans, but this has been one of the biggest weekend in the history of the superhero genre. After over a decade of built-up and hype, “Avengers: Infinity War” has come out. It might very well be the biggest cinematic event since “Star Wars,” “Titanic,” or the first time someone saw female nipples on a movie screen.

There’s no way to overstate it. “Avengers: Infinity War” is a game-changing moment for a genre and an industry. Beyond simply giving Disney and Marvel a fresh pool of money to swim in, it promises to raise the bar for just how epic a superhero movie can be and just how impactful superheroes are on popular culture.

I still intend to craft my full review of the movie. I imagine there are plenty of people out there still in line, trying to get tickets for this monumental convergence of cinematic spectacle. I urge every one of those people to hang in there. I assure you the wait is worth it.

To make that weight slightly more bearable, I dedicate this week’s edition of my Sexy Sunday Thoughts to all those celebrating release of “Avengers: Infinity War.” We’ve waited a long time for a moment like this. Let’s celebrate it as best we can and for me, that means a little sex appeal.


“You can accurately judge the experience and skill of a lover by how well they touch nipples.”


“Is it possible that leather is only associated with kink because it’s easier to wipe away embarrassing stains?”


“Whoever invented the UV lamp probably made a LOT of unexpected enemies.”


“Technically speaking, an orgy is a conspiracy of orgasms.”


“Laughing during sex is only slightly less awkward than throwing up during desert.”


“Sex can be given, love has be earned, and anal must be negotiated.”


“Using a vibrator during sex is the intimate equivalent of a spoiler.”


These sexy thoughts might not have the power of the Infinity Gauntlet or the menacing presence of Thanos. If nothing else, I hope they get peoples’ hearts racing for reasons other than those evoked by the movie. For superhero fans, comic fans, and fans of all things epic, “Avengers: Infinity War” is a historic achievement. The way I see it, some sexy musings can be part of the celebration.

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Sexy Sunday Thoughts: Fluffy Bath Robe Edition

Image result for woman in bathrobe

I have a handful of simple, less elaborate pleasures that put a smile on my face, no matter what kind of day I’m having. These pleasures aren’t anything like the passionate, sexy love stories I enjoy telling. They’re smaller and more personal, often involving something basic and somewhat mundane.

Of the many simpler pleasures I enjoy throughout my life, one of the most underrated is the feeling of wearing a nice, fluffy bath robe. I know that sounds cheesy. It may not even sound particularly manly. I don’t care because I enjoy it that much. There’s just something about the way the soft fabric touches my naked skin that puts me in a good mood.

Now, I’m not talking about the kind of cheap bath robes that are basically glorified towels. I’m talking about the extra soft, premium quality robes that make your skin feel like it’s being surrounded by the fur of kittens and puppies. Spend enough time surrounded by something like that, and it’s impossible to be in a bad mood for too long.

My extra-soft, extra-fluffy bath robe is one of my favorite pieces of clothing. Even though I’m quite fond of being naked, I’m just as fond of lounging around in my bath robe. It also makes answering the door a lot less awkward.

In celebration of that special feeling of a nice bathrobe, I hereby dedicate this week’s edition of my Sexy Sunday Thoughts to this simple pleasure. If you have one of those robes, I hope you’re either wearing it or take a moment to put one on. I contend it’s a feeling worth sharing and celebrating.


“Those who don’t learn how to cook will find out the hard way that few people gets horny on an empty stomach.”

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“You can’t claim your relationship is that serious until you feel comfortable pooping with the bathroom door open.”


“Do the various shapes of female sex toys prove our ignorance of female anatomy or just reflect the sheer breadth of female pleasure?”

Image result for woman collection of sex toys


“A man with an attractive secretary sends the same message as a woman with a fancy lace underwear.”

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“A couple that spends more money on their honeymoon than their wedding shows their willing to invest in each other’s sex lives.”

Image result for couple in Tahiti


“Sex appeal is like quantum mechanics in that few understand it and too much observation obscures the conclusions.”

Image result for sexy woman scientist


“When you think about it, matching tattoos are the romantic equivalent of a bar code.”

Image result for couples with matching tattoos


To all those lucky enough to have a soft, fluffy bath robe, I hope these sexy musings helped enhance the comfort. To those who don’t own one, I hope this at least offers some insight into such an underrated pleasure. These little things may not amount to much, especially compared to the sexy experiences I write about in my novels. They’re still uniquely satisfying in their own right.

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Sexy Sunday Thoughts: Sunburn Recovery Edition

When I wrote my regular entry of Sexy Sunday Thoughts last week, I did so while watching the sun rise over the beach. As soon as I was finished, I put on my swim trunks, lathered up with enough sunscreen for a trip to Venus, and spent the rest of the day at the beach. It was as fun and sexy as it sounds.

That was last week, though. This week is a bit different. By that, I mean I’m not looking at the sun rising over the beach in a pristine display of nature’s beauty. I’m back home, hunched over a desk, and stuck looking at overly sexy bikini ads as the closest I’ll get to seeing real bikinis until next summer.

On top of that, I’m dealing with a nasty sunburn. Yes, I know I just said I lathered up with enough sunscreen to make me smell like a coconut factory. No, it didn’t work completely. Sure, I managed to avoid getting the more sensitive parts of my body burned. I’ll let you use your sexy imagination to see what I mean. Some parts, however, did not escape the sun’s wrath.

For the past few days, I’ve been treating those burns with whatever remedy I can find at a drug store. It can only do so much, though. In my experience, a little sexy musings help aid in the process. So with that in mind, I dedicate this week’s edition of Sexy Sunday Thoughts to those recovering from sun burn. Hang in there, folks. The sun can burn your skin, but it cannot snuff your sexiness.


“As the prevalence of self-driving cars increases, so too will the number of children conceived in them.”


“It’s easy to confuse true love and great sex, but even easier to not give a damn on most days.”


“The sound women make when they orgasm is akin music whereas the sound men make is akin to getting a tooth pulled.”


“The association between cigarettes and sex is hypocritical when you consider that nobody finds coughing that very sexy.”


“When you think about it, there aren’t a whole lot of steps between being a hugger and being a slut.”


“Having too many horny men in a particular area is likely to result in crimes, but having too many women is likely to result in a party.”


“The popularity of sex toys has given men too many reasons to be suspicious of anything a woman owns that vibrates.”


I hope those sexy thoughts aid in the healing process for whatever sunburns anyone incurred by laying out by the pool, lounging on the beach, or just generally doing something outside that allowed them to omit some clothing. I know it burns. I know it doesn’t look that sexy. That said, I’d still say it was worth it.

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