Tag Archives: sexual intimacy

Daily Sexy Musings: Sharing A Hot Shower

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The following is a sexy musing on the joys and inherent sex appeal of a hot shower. More specifically, it’s about how that joy and sexiness gets enhanced when we have someone to share it with.

It’s not just a scene out of a bad porno. A hot shower shared with a lover is one of the most understated acts of intimacy. It’s not just one of those situations that’s likely to result in some impromptu lovemaking. There are larger forces at work, both of the loving kind and of the sexy kind. Enjoy!

We enter cold and dirty. We leave warm and clean.

We enter stressed and miserable. We leave relaxed and content.

A hot shower is like being reborn, cleansed and cleaned from rigors of daily life. It requires no skill to enjoy. It needs little in terms of resources. A steady source of water and heat are the only requirements. Nearly every society in every part of the world has the means and desire to enjoy it.

Beyond cleaning our bodies, it requires that we be intimate with ourselves. It demands that we know our bodies, touching and feeling every little sinew. We know the parts that need extra care. We try to be extra careful, trusting our hands and the will that guides them to all the right places.

Alone, however, a hot shower can only do so much. Like a hot cup of coffee on a cold winter morning, it’s a simple act that gets the job done. It’s only when you share that warm, rejuvenating experience that it becomes something more. Instead of one cup, there’s a whole feast of deserts we eagerly consume.

Together, we shed our clothes and our inhibitions.

Together, we enter a hot, steamy world.

Together, we cleanse one another of grime and stress.

Under torrents of hot water, we’re drawn to one another. We seek to share in its healing power. Our naked bodies are so close, able to touch without barrier or restraint. There are no forces keeping us apart and plenty of forces drawing us together. It’s a world where love and desire complement rather than conflict.

It starts off simple. We soak ourselves in water. We embrace, finally clean of the sweat incurred by a long day. Hands touch, lips meet, and body parts rub together in an intimate mesh. From simple contact, a greater desire blossoms. From that desire, passion ignites. In a steamy world, we are unbound. The heat cannot stop us. Instead, it only fuels us.

We can be as messy as we want. We can be as thorough as we want. Under steady stream of water, we exist in a perfect cycle of renewal and revitalization. We feel bolder, feeling each other up with more fervor and stirring in one another the most heated of passions.

It’s a perfect domain for a perfect venting, a harmonious blend of love and desire. Through the water and steam, our flesh longs for a more thorough cleaning. Our own hands may make us feel content. Only our lover’s hands can make us feel fulfilled.

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Daily Sexy Musings: On Football And Passion

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The following is a fresh entry of my daily sexy musings that was inspired by the first week of the NFL regular season. I understand it’s one of those concepts that isn’t inherently sexy, even for die-hard football fans like me. I also understand that it’s a sport that primarily appeals to men. I know there are plenty of passionate female fans, some of which I know personally, but this is the perception.

Despite those circumstances, I think there’s real sex appeal in the sport of football and I’m not just referring to the outfits worn by the cheerleaders. It’s an intense, physical sport. Love and sex can also be intense and physical. It’s just a matter of channeling it. This is my effort to channel both into a single, sexy concept. Enjoy!

The game begins. You take the field with a goal and a game plan. You know what you want. You know what you have to do to get it. There are obstacles in your way, but the rewards are more than worth it. What you want and what you seek is there before you. It’s not enough to seek it, either. You have to earn it.

It’s more than a game. It’s more than a passion. It’s a part of life. It’s a necessity, an identity, and a skill. It dominates your thoughts, evokes your strongest feelings, and drives you to strive for something greater. You don’t always get it, but losing doesn’t make you want it less. If anything, it makes you want it even more.

To achieve it, you need to work.

To work, you need to sweat.

To sweat, you need to be physical.

Most importantly, though, you need to work as a team. Alone, you can only do so much. You can still achieve plenty. To win that ultimate prize, though, you need others who will work with you. You need someone willing to put in the work, sweat, and physicality. Not every teammate will get along with you. Those that do, though, are special. With them, and only them, you win.

One win is not enough, though.

A single win is just one step in a longer journey. Many can win a single game, but only an elite few can win over the course of an entire season. Even fewer can win over the course of many seasons. Champions come and go. Dynasties rise and fall. Those that play hard and together leave a lasting legacy that inspires others to follow suit.

To make your mark, you must be willing to sacrifice. You endure the hits, take the chances, and learn from mistakes. You coordinate and collaborate, seeking guidance and growth from those who came before you. There’s never an end. There’s only a process. The players come and go, but the game continues, season by season.

The game of football and the game of love, two worlds driven by passion and grit, push us to our limits. They dare us to be greater, trusting others and sharing burdens. It is a game many play, but few master. It is a spectacle that entertains and astonishes. Sometimes, we play. Sometimes, we cheer others on. Through the feelings it inspires, we all feel like champions.

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Sex Doll Brothels And The First (Of Many) Legal Battles

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Go back 100 years and chances are that the smartest, most capable lawyer or judge wouldn’t know how to craft reasonable legislation on what constitutes “obscenity.” In the United States, there wasn’t even a legal standard for until 1973 with the Miller v. California case.

Go back 25 years and chances are even the greatest legal minds of the time would have trouble creating legislation about issues such as online harassment, net neutrality, and fake news. The very concept wouldn’t make sense to them because it has no contemporary context. As a result, the people of a particular time and place can’t hope to make sense of the legal issues that subsequently emerge decades later.

This is the emerging situation with sex dolls. Specifically, it’s the laws governing the growing commercial uses of sex dolls that go beyond that of personal masturbation aids. I’ve often mentioned sex dolls as a precursor to intelligent sex robots, which are certain to be a game-changer for the overall sexual landscape. However, sex robots are the future. Sex dolls exist now.

Even though sex dolls have existed for decades, the industry is maturing to a point where they’re not just exceedingly expensive sex toys. They’re a growing segment of a multi-billion dollar industry. Beyond just being a toy, though, sex dolls have the potential to establish a whole new segment of the sex industry.

In early 2018, France opened its first brothel that exclusively utilized sex dolls. While this did cause controversy, efforts to close it failed. As of this writing, it is still open for business. Around that same time, I predicted that this would be the beginning of a much larger legal quandary. Thanks to some recent news from Canada, this prediction is ahead of schedule.

In August 2018, the city of Toronto was poised to open its first sex doll brothel. It would’ve been the first establishment of its kind in North America. Like France, it generated plenty of controversy. Unlike France, though, the public protests succeeded. The brothel’s opening was suspended. As of this writing, there are no plans to open the sex doll brothel at another location.

That’s not to say it won’t happen. In fact, if I were to bet money on the issue, I would wager that a sex doll brothel in North America will open at some point between now and the end of 2019. It probably won’t be in Toronto, but there will be some locality that decides to take a chance. It’s just a matter of when and who has the bravado/business sense to try it.

I won’t go so far as to say it’s inevitable, but I believe the events in France and Canada have laid the foundation for a new legal struggle. As the laws surrounding prostitution become more restrictive, the demand for a sexual outlet is not going away. You can implement as many laws and taboos as you want. Horny people will find an outlet.

I see the emergence of sex doll brothels as both a reaction and a byproduct of the current rhetoric surrounding prostitution and sexuality, in general. The sex-negative attitudes of social conservative, radical feminists, and other regressive whiners have done such a thorough job of conflating prostitution with exploitation that it’s becoming exceedingly impractical for flesh-and-blood prostitutes to operate.

The passage of recent laws intended to combat human trafficking, of which prostitution is only a small part, was a tipping point. It was hard enough for sex workers to operate prior to those laws and since politicians are more reluctant than ever to favor legislation associated with exploiting women, sex dolls are likely to emerge as a viable recourse.

From a legal standpoint, sex doll brothels are in an uncertain state. They’re not people. They have no measure of intelligence, artificial or otherwise. They are literal objects. While that’s sure to offend more than a few select people out there, that’s what they are from a legal point of view.

Even though they’re objects with overtly sexual functions, they are legal. Outside absurd laws in places like Alabama, a private citizen can legally purchase and use sex toys in most of the industrialized world. If you had the money and wanted to, you could order a sex doll today and face no legal repercussions.

On top of that, there are no laws that prohibit people from borrowing someone else’s sex toy. Set aside, for a moment, the revulsion of using someone else’s sex toy. There are no laws prohibiting such a practice. Being able to rent someone else’s toys/products is an established commercial activity practiced by arcades, pool halls, and gyms.

Under that framework, a sex doll brothel could conceivably operate in a manner similar to an arcade. In fact, that’s the legal argument that the operators of the sex doll brothel in France used to keep it open. The argument was that there were no people working in the brothel. These were just toys. Technically speaking, the place wasn’t a brothel. It was a “gaming operation.”

In the legal world, technicalities are often a good work-around, but they’re rarely the basis for a long-term solution. Make no mistake. Sex dolls and sex doll brothels will need long-term solutions, especially as the sex robot industry matures. The only question is how to go about it.


Would sex doll brothels be regulated like strip clubs?

It’s possible, but that would establish a legal precedent for declaring anything sexually stimulating, including people, as objects or toys. Even the most sex-negative of individuals probably don’t want to establish that precedent.


Would sex doll brothels be regulated like massage parlors?

This is also possible, but it comes with its own legal shortcomings. There are, indeed, legitimate massage parlors that function primarily as day spas. You probably see them in strip malls next to a Hallmark and a dry cleaner. These are not places where people go for sexual release.

Then, there are other massage parlors that still consider themselves massage parlors, but offer “extras” on the side. Whenever there’s a prostitution bust these days, many of those operations involve massage parlors and more than a few have been known to use trafficked women. That association, alone, would make this classification for sex doll brothels difficult.


Would sex doll brothels be regulated like adult novelty stories?

This is probably the most likely. It wouldn’t be that much of a stretch for an establishment to sell both sex toys and provide space for someone to use a sex doll. In fact, this function may end up making sex shops more lucrative. As long as it’s not employing actual prostitutes, then it avoids the same pitfalls as massage parlors.

That’s not to say there won’t be issues. Sex shops are already subject to plenty of opposition. Go to any municipality and you’ll find that zoning laws will go out of their way to place immense burdens on such establishments. They usually can’t be located near residential areas, churches, or schools. They’re often seen as a public nuisance, even when they’re small. A sex doll brothel would be much more visible.

Even in a scenario where sex doll brothels are regulated like an adult novelty store, I imagine most people won’t live near one. Only extra-libertarian communities would even permit them with reasonable regulations. Even those that don’t prohibit them will probably be protested by religious zealots and sex-negative feminists claiming that these establishments promote obscenity, sin, and rape culture.

As a result, I suspect that the future of sex dolls and sex doll brothels will probably circumvent all of that by using them as an escort service. If it’s no longer possible for actual people to work as escorts, then chances are some enterprising sex workers will simply exchange the person for the sex doll. Instead of going somewhere, people order a sex doll the same way they would order a pizza.

In this scenario, there’s no need for commercial space. Someone could run the whole thing out of a garage, a basement, or a rental storage unit. That operation might require some resources, especially once sex robots mature. As long as there are horny customers willing to pay for a sexual outlet, though, there will be a market for it.

That’s the one inescapable fact that will drive both the industry and the legislation surrounding it. You can stamp out prostitution, sex work, and sex toys all you want. People are still going to get horny. They’re still going to seek an outlet. The emergence of sex doll brothels are just the latest and they’re sure to set many precedents, not all of which will be sexy.

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Daily Sexy Musings: It Starts With A Touch

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The following is a sexy musing on simple touching and how it can turn into something sexy. It may seem like common sense and the basis of many sexy stories, including a few I’ve written, but I believe there’s something much more profound/sensual at work. Enjoy!

One touch is all it took. First, they touched their lover’s shoulder. It was simple, generic, and non-sexual. It was affection at its most basic level. Then, like a seed becoming a giant redwood, it grew and blossomed into something much greater.

One touch became another.

Multiple touches became intimate feelings.

Intimate feelings became powerful lust.

Powerful lust became intense love.

Intense love mixed with all of the above, manifesting into a single cumulative act that encompasses so much.

It all started with that one, simple touch. It can happen at any time under any number of circumstances. Maybe it’s late at night when you and your lover are feeling restless. Maybe it’s early in the morning when a day’s worth of energy hits you both. Maybe it’s the middle of the day when spontaneity or outright boredom take hold. In any case, the evolution of that one touch unfolds.

No words are necessary. Everything that needs to be said is told through action. A caressing of the face reveals affection. A grasp of the buttocks reveals lust. Feeling up the sinews and curves of a lover’s body evokes desire. From expressing our own desires, we then feel desired. It is a perfect cycle of love and lust.

It happens quickly and suddenly. It can be intentional or unintentional. However it happens, the underlying theme is the same. One touch is all it takes to convey so much feeling. Both emotionally and physically, one touch can become an act of intense passion or an outburst of blind lust.

With one touch, the most complex of feelings and the most basic of acts unfold all at once. A caress turns into entrancement. Entrancement becomes foreplay. Foreplay becomes sex. Sex becomes love. It blossoms and blooms, tapping into and channeling the very beauty of nature. It’s just a simple touch, but for two passionate lovers, that’s all it takes.

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When Sex Toys Get Smart (And How We Can Learn From Them)

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Ever since our phones and computers got smart enough to talk to us, it seems as though every gadget, appliance, and widget we can possibly overpay for is getting smarter as well. Our cars are almost smart enough to drive themselves. Our ovens are getting smart enough to do most of the cooking for us. There’s even a smart fork that senses how fast you’re eating and tries to get you to slow down.

We can argue endlessly on whether or not so many smart gadgets are more trouble than they’re worth. I’m sure there are a significant number of people, young and old alike, who roll their eyes at the idea of making too many gadgets too smart. We shouldn’t be making Skynet’s job that easy in the first place.

Even those anti-gadget people, though, would have to admit they’re a little bit intrigued by the prospect of smarter sex toys. If nothing else, I’m sure the idea has crossed their perverse minds in some form or another, hopefully in a private setting where they can let their imagination get a little kinky.

Well, they don’t need to rely wholly on their kinky imagination because smart sex toys are already here. It’s true. Thanks to sexy new companies like Loiness, you can buy a colorful, phallic-shaped vibrator that can work with your smartphone to know how to pleasure you.

I’m not talking about a simple timer or different settings either. This thing actually gathers data every time you use it, creates a sexual profile for you, and extrapolates the optimum way to bring you to orgasm. Admit it. Reading over that last sentence got you more than a little excited.

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It’s as exciting as it is arousing, our sex toys learning how to pleasure us in the best way possible. It’s one of the most critical steps we can along the path that will inevitably lead to fully-functional sex robots. Those robots are going to need data on how to pleasure us. These sex toys will help them and give us more orgasms in the process. I can’t think of a better win-win that doesn’t involve melted chocolate.

Before sex robots can come, which I know is a lurid choice of words, we need to get comfortable with the idea of a machine giving us an orgasm. There’s only so much sexual interest we can gain from watching sexy female robots in movies like “Terminator 3” or “Ex Machina.” At some point, the idea has to be more than a novelty for tech-savvy nymphomaniacs. It has to be just another tool for sexual satisfaction.

We’re still not there quite yet, but these smart sex toys will help us and not just when it comes to orgasms. By being smart about how we like to pleasure ourselves, it’ll also help us be smarter on how we go about it. When it comes to having a satisfying sex life, few things are as critical.

You could make the argument, and I have on this blog, that all satisfying sex starts in the brain. Our genitals are close accomplices, but the brain is always the mastermind when it comes to making it the trip to O-Town. That brain, however, has many inherent obstacles and I’m not just talking about the struggle to keep picturing Hugh Jackman naked.

As much progress as we’ve made in our culture, we’re still somewhat uptight when it comes to talking about, or even thinking about, our sex life. When I was in high school, I got a pretty comprehensive education on the mechanics of sex and why certain priests, mullahs, and republicans didn’t want us having a lot of sex. At no point, however, did I ever learn about male and female orgasms. That wasn’t even hinted at.

Just knowing what sex is won’t equip anyone in forging a satisfying sex life. That’s one part of sex education where people just expect teenagers to wing it. That can be dangerous, leading to some people to become laughably misinformed about sex. Then, we’re surprised when we learn about things like the orgasm gap or that around 15 percent of women never experience orgasm during sex.

As an erotica/romance writer and a fan of both genders sharing in the pleasure, I find that situation untenable. It shows just how much we’ve failed to inform each other or ourselves about what gets us all hot and bothered in the best possible way. We’re not going to learn that from a teacher, a religious figure, or even our parents, who would rather clean a toilet with their tongues than talk to their kids about sex.

That’s where these smart sex toys can really show their value. A smart sex toy won’t get awkward or coy when talking about orgasms, discharges, and the various fluids involved with sex. A smart sex toy won’t censor certain parts of the process out of embarrassment. A smart sex toy will actually try to teach you and guide you in your effort to have the best orgasm possible.

In a sense, a smart sex toy is establishing the gold standard by which to gauge a satisfying sexual experience. It effectively does the work you once needed a dedicated, ambitious, overly-patient partner to help you discover. Smart sex toys will do that work for them, making things easier for yourself and your partner. Again, that’s as big a win-win as you’ll get without bacon flavored lube being involved.

It could even help prepare young people for sex more effectively than just giving them diagrams of genitals in health class. Most teenagers aren’t going to talk about how they like to stimulate their genitals in the presence of an adult, especially a parent or teacher. They will talk to a smart sex toy, though. They already talk to their phones these days. Talking to a sex toy wouldn’t be that great a leap.

A smart sex toy won’t judge, laugh, or belittle them. It’ll just gather data for the sole purpose of giving them a better orgasm. Imagine every virgin, male or female, being that equipped on their first time. They know what makes them come. They know how to go about it. How many awkward prom nights could be spared by this technology? In that sense, the work companies like Lioness are doing couldn’t be more vital.

Smart sex toys, if used responsibly, will do wonders for our collective sex lives. If knowledge is power and power is sex, then smart sex toys will make us all more inherently powerful. Given the many health benefits of orgasms, that power is invaluable.

If you’re interested/horny to explore smart sex toys, please consider products like the Lioness, the Lovelife Krush, the VaGenie, and the Afterglow. The future will surely bring us more and better smart sex toys. If something really groundbreaking and sexy comes along, expect me to write about it.

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