Tag Archives: relationships

A Memorable (And Funny) Thanksgiving Story About My Ex-Girlfriend

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It’s that time of year again. The holidays are almost upon us and we’re at the point where we can no longer complain about people putting their decorations up too early. It’s a wonderful, festive time. I’ve always loved the holidays. I’m usually among the first to put my decorations up, much to the chagrin of family and friends.

The holidays often bring out the best in people. You don’t have to look too hard for examples of that. Some of my fondest family memories have occurred over the holidays. I’ve even shared a few of them. With Thanksgiving just a few days away, I’d like to share another. Once again, it involves my ex-girlfriend.

I’ve shared stories about her before and, by and large, I’ve tried to show her in a positive light. I really enjoyed my time with her while we were together. I’m not at all bitter that we didn’t work out. I like to think that she feels the same way. A few years after we broke up, I found out that she got married and is genuinely happy. I hope I can one day say the same.

This particular story, however, highlights a moment that she doesn’t remember that fondly. As it just so happens, that moment unfolded when she visited my area for Thanksgiving. While I still think it’s funny, I doubt she’ll agree. At the same time, I think she would laugh as well when recalling the details.

It actually occurred after we’d been together for a while. She’d visited my place before. She’d met my family and got along with them quite well. My family is wonderful, warm, and welcoming as a whole, especially around the holidays. We definitely got that point across during previous visits. In hindsight, it might have set the stage for what happened next.

It was the day after Thanksgiving. Typically, after the big meal, we get together with a few relatives and family friends for another gathering not far from where my parents live. It wasn’t as big or crowded as Thanksgiving dinner. It was mostly an excuse for other relatives to meet up, make more food, and catch up after however many months it had been since our last gathering.

While driving her there, I gave her a few details about this side of my family. There weren’t too many caveats or taboos to warn her about. That was a good thing too because she didn’t have much of a filter. She said what was on her mind and did things her own way. That was part of what attracted me to her. Knowing this, I still made one thing clear to her before we arrived.

Do NOT try and pet the cat. He will scratch you and not in a cute way.

I must have told her that at least three times. I was dead serious too. This particular house had a rather notorious cat that a close relative had been caring for. I know cats aren’t known for being social creatures, but this one was a special kind of mean. He didn’t like anyone, except for those who regularly fed him.

I’d seen this cat attack more than a few friends and relatives who didn’t heed that warning. I knew it would be tricky for my ex-girlfriend because she loves animals. She had a pet of her own back home and she never missed an opportunity to interact with them, especially if they were cute. I urged her to make an exception this time. I even tried to distract her from the cat once we arrived.

It was no use. Shortly after we sat down for dinner, the cat wandered near the table. My ex-girlfriend saw him and just couldn’t resist. I warned her again. I told her not to go near him. She didn’t listen. To no one’s surprise, including my own, the cat scratched her the moment she tried to pet him. He scratched her pretty good too. It required a band aid and ointment.

Naturally, she was not happy. While I helped tend to her hand, I couldn’t stop laughing. She thought she could coax some affection out of that cat. I admired her confidence, her heart, and her bravery. It still wasn’t enough.

Much to her credit, she scolded herself more than she scolded me. After all, I did warn her multiple times. She just chose not to listen. She avoided the cat for the rest of the visit. I’m pretty sure that was the first time she despised an otherwise adorable animal. It was jarring and it did affect her mood for the rest of the day.

She still got over it. She even joked about it the next day. It might not have been the most romantic moment we shared during her visit, but it definitely made Thanksgiving more memorable, albeit for unusual reasons.

Moments like that are part of what make the holidays special. They’re also moments that make relationships special, even if they don’t work out. I’m certain that if I ever crossed paths with my ex again, I could tell her the name of that cat and she would remember. She might not remember it as fondly as I do, but I think she’d still laugh at it.

One day, when I meet the love of my life, I hope to make many memories like that. I also hope plenty of them occur on Thanksgiving, but I think I could do without asshole cats.

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Vision, the Scarlet Witch, and the MCU’s Romance Problem

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Trying to find flaws in the Marvel Cinematic Universe these days is like trying to find a flaw in Mr. Rogers. It’s pretty much impossible, unless you’re willing to be exceedingly petty. Even the most ardent critic can’t deny the success of this now iconic cinematic universe. Such a franchise doesn’t make over $7 billion at the box office by having many egregious flaws.

That said, the MCU is not without its shortcomings and I’m not just talking about underperforming outliers like “The Incredible Hulk” or outright failures like “Inhumans.” One such shortcoming, which I feel has not had sufficient scrutiny, has to do with romance in the MCU. As someone who is a lifelong comic book fan and an admitted romantic, this stands out to me more than most.

It only became more apparent with the upcoming a TV series starring Vision and the Scarlet Witch on the Disney+ streaming service. The romance fan and the comic book fan in me initially liked that idea because Vision and the Scarlet Witch are one of the Avenger’s most endearing and colorful romances in the comics. This is definitely one of those relationships that can carry an entire show.

However, given that this takes place in the MCU, the concept is already on a shaky foundation. While the events of “Avengers: Infinity War” established that these two characters are romantically involved, there’s little in terms of how that relationship developed. As a result, the tragedy that played out in the Battle of Wakanda had little dramatic weight.

It’s one of the few glaring flaws in an otherwise stellar narrative. However, the lack of romantic depth between Vision and the Scarlet Witch is only the most obvious symptom of a much larger problem that has been unfolding in the MCU since the days of “Iron Man” and “Thor.”

Some parts of that problem are pure logistics. Building a cinematic universe on the scale of the MCU requires a lot of moving parts and, as a result, romance was often a secondary concern. Kevin Feige and the creative minds at Marvel Studios opted to prioritize other aspects of character development. Given the MCU’s unprecedented winning streak, it’s safe to say those priorities were well-placed.

It’s only recently that the lack of emphasis on romance has caught up to the MCU. From having Thor break up with Jane Foster prior to “Thor Ragnarok” to horribly mismatched romance between Hulk and Black Widow, there’s a glaring absence of successful, well-developed romances in the MCU.

Even the successful romances, namely Tony Stark and Pepper Pots or Ant Man and Wasp, had much of that success unfold off-screen. At most, a movie would show them getting together or enduring a major conflict, but there would rarely be any moments that fleshed out the romance in a meaningful way. Every bit of development only centered around defeating a villain, which is good catalyst for romance, but not much else.

Now, we’re getting an entire show about a couple who were on opposite sides of the conflict in “Captain America: Civil War” and inexplicably together in “Avengers: Infinity War.” In terms of meaningful romance, this is not a trivial oversight. If someone didn’t know their romantic history in the comics, then they would be understandably confused as to why they ended up together.

Not seen here is ANY hint that these two have been flirting.

It’s the same problem that the original “X-Men” movies made when developing the horribly flawed love triangle between Cyclops, Jean Grey, and Wolverine. The narrative in the movies relied too heavily on assuming peoples’ knowledge of the source material in lieu of providing an understandably reason as to why this romance is occurring. Again, that’s not a trivial oversight.

How is anyone who only saw “Captain America: Civil War” and “Avengers: Infinity War” supposed to buy into the relationship between Vision and the Scarlet Witch? The movies only establish that they’re together. They don’t establish why, how, or what they went through in establishing their relationship. Everyone is just left to assume, which is rarely a good strategy for developing meaningful romance.

Even if the relationship between Vision and the Scarlet Witch were entirely platonic, it would still be quite a stretch to believe that they have a genuinely intimate connection. It’s possible that the upcoming show will help develop that connection, but there’s no getting around how underdeveloped it has been to this point.

The same could be said for other relationships throughout the MCU. Some are so underdeveloped that when intimate moments do occur, they rarely have much impact. Captain America’s relationship with Peggy Carter in his first movie probably had the best foundation, of all the MCU romances, but that only made him kissing her niece, Sharon, feel downright wrong. Haley Atwell herself has said as such.

Romance, even among fictional characters, requires some level of chemistry to go along with the narrative. While that can be difficult to fit into a single movie, it’s not impossible. Movies like “Man of Steel” and the first “Spider-Man” movie were able to establish the necessary chemistry with only a handful of scenes. Such scenes have been absent or underdeveloped in the MCU.

Ironically, the most fleshed out romance in the MCU is between Starlord and Gamora, two characters who aren’t an endearing love story in the comics. I would even argue that the scene in which Starlord sacrifices himself to save Gamora in the first “Guardians of the Galaxy” movie shows more romantic depth than any other MCU movie to date.

It didn’t take much to show that Starlord and Gamora have chemistry. From their first interactions to the many challenges they overcame over the course of two movies, they developed a powerful connection that just isn’t there for Vision and the Scarlet Witch. That connection is part of what made the events between them in “Avengers: Infinity War” so heart-wrenching.

That same sentiment just wasn’t there with Vision. We knew from the events of two previous movies that Starlord genuinely loved Gamora. We understood how strong it was by the time Thanos entered the picture. There’s none of that present with Vision and the Scarlet Witch. When they face a similar situation, it just doesn’t have the same impact.

It probably helps that Guardians of the Galaxy was a relatively obscure series before the first movie and has little history of iconic romances compared to the Avengers. However, it does show that the MCU is capable of meaningful romance. It just seems incapable of applying it to the more notable couples from the comics.

While such flaws haven’t stopped the MCU from succeeding on so many other levels, it still ensures that Vision and the Scarlet Witch have an uphill battle in terms of proving their romance is more than an assumed contrivance. It’s certainly not impossible, but there’s a lot to develop in terms of chemistry and depth.

Given on how “Avengers Endgame” played out, it may not matter how poorly past romances have been handled. However, the impact it has had in the “Guardians of the Galaxy” movies shows that there is a place for romance in the MCU. Perhaps Vision and the Scarlet Witch can be part of that with the upcoming show, but it has lot to overcome before it can be the iconic romance that the MCU needs.

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Daily Sexy Musings: To Stun (Or Be Stunned By) Your Lover

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There’s a moment in every cheesy romance movie when two characters stand together, look at each other with the utmost intensity, and are utterly overwhelmed. It’s usually not the culmination of a love story. It’s often a catalyst or a turning point. It can be beautiful, but it can also be horribly clichéd. Depending on its impact, it can make or break the story.

In movies like “Crazy/Beautiful” and “The Notebook,” it works. In other movies, like “Summer Catch” or “Good Luck Chuck,” it fails on every level. Having watched more romance movies than any straight man will ever admit, I can tell when that moment carries real emotional weight and when it’s overly forced. It can make or break a love story.

That moment isn’t just a product of cinema. It reflects powerful feelings that we have in real life. For those of us who are or have been in love, we remember that moment when our lover stunned us with their presence. It’s a moment that tends to leave a powerful impression. No matter how the relationship pans out, you remember that moment. You even cherish it on some level.

We want to present our best selves to our lovers. We want to show them and the world around us just how great we can be. It often takes work, planning, and even a little luck. It’s definitely worth doing. I hope this Daily Sexy Musing inspires you to do it in whatever way makes that moment special for you and your lover. Enjoy!

We’ve had time to prepare. Everything is set. I’ve planned everything down to the second. Every reservation, location, and accommodation are in place. I put on my best attire, wanting and knowing that you deserve my best self. Not a single flaw will be visible. The image I present will be one you lock away as a treasured memory. It all seems so perfect.

Then, you open the door and I see you.

Suddenly, my idea of perfection takes on a whole new level.

I am utterly shocked in the best possible way. In that moment, time stops. I can hardly breath, but I’ve never felt more alive. My heart beats faster, my skin gets hotter, and every fiber of my being is now channeled onto you. There’s no doubt in my mind. You had plans too and yours was better.

I walk up to you, making sure it’s not a dream.

I touch your face, if only to feel real beauty in my hands.

I smile at you, letting you know that you’ve brightened my world.

I try to put into words how I feel, knowing it’s utterly impossible.

Together, we stand in this moment, unbound by time and place. We can already feel a treasured memory being forged, etching itself in our minds and hearts. When we draw our last breaths, this will be among those moments that cross our minds, reminding us of our most joyous moments. That’s in the distant future. This is now.

As I hold you and you hold me, we marvel in one another’s awe. I’ve admired your beauty before. I know you’ve admired mine just as much. It comes in many forms, forged and framed in many diverse circumstances. This one is special.

You know it.

I know it.

Together, we embrace it.

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Daily Sexy Musing: Sexy (And Non-Sexy) Snuggling

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In the world of romance, the act of snuggling has a mixed reputation and for good reason. It’s simple. It’s not always sexy. At times, it can be downright bland. It sounds like the kind of weak romantic gestures that your parents or grandparents would do. When you’re intensely in love with someone, it just doesn’t seem sufficient.

While I understand that sentiment, I strongly disagree with the negative connotations that snuggling sometimes gets. It’s not just for parents and couples who just don’t have the energy to make love like horny teenagers anymore. I believe it can be a very romantic and surprisingly intimate aspect of a good love story.

I concede that snuggling is basic. It’s something you can do with your clothes on. You can even do it in public and not get arrested for it. There’s not a whole lot of variation. You can just lean in close to one another, hug each other, or rest your head on their shoulder or chest. It’s rarely that elaborate, but it doesn’t have to be. That’s where the true power of snuggling lies.

It’s one of those things that, if you’re with someone you really love, doesn’t require some grand gesture to get the point across. If you’re at a point in your relationship where you can convey how much you love someone with a simple gesture, then you’ve got yourself a pretty solid romance. It tends to show most prominently in snuggling. That’s why I’m more than happy to make it the subject of a Daily Sexy Musing. Enjoy!

There’s a time for intense moments of passion.

There’s a time for space, solitude, and contemplation.

There’s a time for intensely dramatic exchanges.

This is not one of those times.

Right now, I seek only your loving warmth. My body isn’t cold, but I still shiver. I have a desire to share in our love, but lack the energy to express it in a grand, romantic gesture. What I seek is neither spectacle nor grand. Sometimes, the simplest kind of love is all I need.

I move in closer.

I curl up next to you.

I let the heat of our bodies mix and meld.

Together, we snuggle in a shared moment of contentment. Our bodies touch and our spirits become entwined, but we need not escalate the feeling beyond the raw basics. There’s plenty of warmth, but no burning heat. Every gesture is soft and subtle, but the meaning is still great in scale.

A little warmth hints at fiery passion.

A light touch teases intense desire.

A bit of contentment preludes immense ecstasy.

We both feel it, whether awake or asleep. As we hold one another in ways both slight and strong, our love becomes real. It manifests in a basic, tangible. We can feel it and sense it, the breadth of our love. No words are necessary. A simple touch and a loving glance tells the whole story.

In that tale of love and passion, we’ve already succeeded. We went on a journey and made it to the end. The greatest fruits are there, but appetites aren’t always that great. If making love is a feast, then a simple snuggle is a wondrous treat.

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Daily Sexy Musings: Subtle (Yet Sexy) Gestures

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There’s a time and place for big, romantic displays. Be they marriage proposals, anniversary presents, or Valentine’s Day gifts, there’s certainly a proper situation for that kind of spectacle. Being a romantic, I appreciate them more than most. I go out of my way to celebrate them in my novels and my sexy short stories.

As great as those displays can be, there’s something just as special about the subtle things. If you’ve ever been in love or in a serious relationship, you know what I’m talking about. It’s not some grand speech or some heart-warming display. It can be something as simple as a hug, a light kiss, or a slight caress. Whatever form it takes, it can convey more romantic sentiment than a thousand Valentine’s Day cards.

It’s something I think I notice more than most. Earlier this year, I saw a lot of it when I attended a wedding. The couple getting married weren’t the most theatrical with their love, but they had all these subtle gestures that told the story of their romance. Without getting into too many personal details, I can attest that it’s a hell of a story and one that no amount of words can tell.

I haven’t been in a relationship that serious to know what it’s like, but I hope to be in that position one day. I hope to meet someone who can take my hand and know everything I’m feeling, just through touch. It might seem melodramatic or clichéd, but it’s part of what makes love so powerful.

Having not experienced it directly, there’s only so much I can do to describe it. Keep that in mind with this Daily Sexy Musing. I can only contemplate what I’ve observed. To those lucky enough to feel it, I hope I did it justice.

It’s just a simple touch.

That’s what it looks like to the rest of the world. I stand next to you, take your hand in mine, and cast you a loving smile. It’s so mundane that nobody notices. Countless people walk by, not noticing the extent of what they see. To them, they just see two lovers, sharing a simple moment out in the open.

They have no idea how much meaning I impart.

They have no idea how much passion I convey.

They have no idea how much affection I share.

None of that matters because you know. In your eyes, I see the spark of understanding. You know why I’m saying without fancy words or elaborate displays. From the way I squeeze your hand to the way I lean into your warmth, you feel the intensity of my love. Like a hidden channel or a guarded secret, you have the key and you know how to use it.

In return, you respond with a touch of your own.

Like mine, it’s so simple. As we walk down a crowded street, you lean in and rest your head on my shoulder. Again, nobody casts us a second glance. Few even cast us a first glance. They see our love and they just pass it by. They don’t understand the connection we have, but that’s to be expected. Who else but us could grasp this feeling we’ve forged?

With no words, we can speak volumes.

With a simple gesture, we can unleash oceans of emotions.

With a slight glance, we can tell one another what can never be articulated.

That is the power and breadth of our love. Coming together was the easy part. Forging a connection, letting passions and desires blossom, was our greatest challenge. As I squeeze your hand and you squeeze mine, we confirm that we have triumphed.

Together, in only a few subtle acts, we say everything we need to say.

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Daily Sexy Musings: Brainy Sex Appeal

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It’s an old stereotype that sitcoms, teen comedies, and overused tropes have belabored over the years. Being smart isn’t sexy. You can be the smartest, most intellectually gifted person in the world. That’s still not going to impress the opposite sex as much as big tits, eight-pack abs, or a seven-figure bank account.

Like many stereotypes, it rarely reflects reality. There are people who have both intellectual prowess and uncanny sex appeal. Just look at the academic achievements of celebrities like Dolph Lundgren and Emma Watson. While their intelligence isn’t as easy to notice as their appearance, it does add more depth to their overall appeal.

Being physically attractive is basic. It gets attention and sometimes, that’s all people are looking for. However, people who seek more than that are going to want more than a cute smile. They want someone they can have a conversation with. They want someone who they can interact with mentally, as well as physically. It’s a skill that can help people who aren’t that attractive forge intimate connections.

Intelligence may never be as sexy as washboard abs or a toned butt, but it certainly has a place in establishing what someone has to offer a potential lover. You can only dazzle someone with your looks to a certain point. With a healthy intellect, you can enchant them on multiple levels and that’s a potent kind of sexiness. Consider this Daily Sexy Musing as part of that stimulating conversation, among other things. Enjoy!

With every word you say, you confound me.

With every thought you share, you astonish me.

With every emotion you evoke, you captivate me.

I was in awe of your beauty when I first saw you. Now, I am enraptured by something that cannot be seen, depicted, or molded. Your mind is the source, but what you do with it is the spectacle. Seeking love and finding someone like you is difficult enough. To have both it and a wealth of knowledge is truly incredible.

I listen and learn as often as I love and adore. You challenge me at every turn, like a distant beacon urging me to venture further. Time and again, you reveal how limited I was in mind and spirit.

Is it because I simply cannot hope to match your immense intellect?

Is it because I simply have not applied my mind as much as yours?

I don’t know the answer. Nobody has ever dared raised the question. Until you came along, I thought I knew my mental fortitude. In light of your brilliance, I am just a flicker of light in the shadow of a glowing ball of flame. I may not have the ability to burn brighter, but I have a new perspective.

In you, I connect to a larger world full of grand thoughts.

In you, I widen my gaze to ideas that strain my brain to the utmost.

In you, I dare to contemplate what I cannot understand.

With new knowledge comes new feelings and with those feelings come new passions. Hearing words I barely understand and concepts that I barely grasp gets my heart racing as quickly as my mind. I find myself drawn to you. In your presence, that proverbial flame burns brighter. To hold you in my arms and feel your loving warmth is not a simple act.

When great minds share greater insights, the greatest of passions emerge.

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Daily Sexy Musings: First Dates

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First dates are like the first sentence of an epic story. They’re a necessary and critical step towards turning that initial spark into something deeper and more passionate. Most people don’t know they’ve found the love of their life on a first date. However, if their love is meant to be, that’s when they take their first step.

I’ve had my share of first dates. I have mixed feelings about the date I went on with my first real girlfriend. It wasn’t a disaster, but it wasn’t some romantic epic, either. I took her out to my favorite restaurant, not knowing how to go about it. I was so nervous and inexperienced that I’m pretty sure I made a fool of myself at least twice. Later, I found out my ex was just as nervous and we both ultimately laughed about it.

Even though that relationship didn’t work out, that first date we shared told us that we had something special. It affirmed what we already felt to some extent and that was a great moment. Awkward moments aside, I look back at that first date fondly. To those who are still with their significant others, I’m sure that first date stands out in a great many ways.

A first date is just the first step in a much larger process. It’s a hell of a process, too. Whether or not you’re a romantic, it helps set a tone for a relationship. Strong relationships will often have memorable first dates. I hope this Daily Sexy Musing helps the established couples out there remember that first date fondly.

I just met you.

You just met me.

I don’t know you.

You don’t know me.

Tonight, we change that. I’ve dared to open my heart once more. You return the favor, accepting my invitation and sharing the unspoken intrigue that blossoms between us. Being near you, we both sense the heat of the chemistry between us. It’s like a tension that yearns to break, drawing us closer and beckoning our passions.

Every great love begins with a spark.

Every spark is only the beginning of a larger flame.

Every flame needs space, fuel, and energy to grow.

That’s what tonight is all about. On this, our first date, I intend to make the case that I am someone worth loving. I also hope to surmise whether that chemistry between us is more than just amorous instinct. You are beautiful. That much, I know to be true. Is the soul beneath that beauty worth embracing? That, I don’t know.

It’s a long, arduous process, finding out who someone is and surmising whether they’re the one for us. It involves more than just fancy dates, affectionate gestures, and heated lovemaking. Together, we seek to determine whether our lives can become entwined. Loving each other is only the first step. Being together involves many more.

No matter how many steps there are, I want to find out. In you, I see both passion and possibilities. I want to spend an entire night with you, learning about and briefly exploring your world. If you are willing, I’ll gladly share mine.

I take you by the hand.

I guide you into a night of shared intrigue.

I open myself to you in hopes that you open yourself to me.

This is our first date. We both know how we want this journey to end. Together, we take that first step.

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