The human body is sexy. Most people don’t deny that. To some extent, it has to be sexy. How else could the human race become the most dominant species on this planet? It’s not enough to be cunning, coordinated, and adaptable to all sorts of changing conditions. We need to be sexy so we can propagate and thrive.
While everyone has their own particular tastes and kinks to what they find sexy, some parts of the human body contain an almost universal sex appeal. Chief among those parts is the human buttocks. Now, I’m not going to break out into song and sing an elaborate ode to sexy butts everywhere. I’ll leave that to the likes of Nicki Minaj and Sir Mix-A-Lot. I still want to celebrate that unique sexiness.
Unlike female breasts, a sexy butt is gender neutral. We all have one and while the nature of the sex appeal differs with gender, the sexy logistics are the same. A nice butt in a woman accentuates feminine sex appeal. A nice butt in a man complements masculine prowess. When properly applied, it can bring out all sorts of sexiness among lovers.
Whether it’s for a one night stand or between spouses who’ve been married for several decades, a simple glimpse at a strong butt can lead to something sexy. It’s part of why I’m so descriptive in my novels and sexy short stories. This Daily Sexy Musing is just my way of acknowledging the power that a sexy butt can exude. Enjoy!
You bend over.
I lean in.
That’s all it takes.
Whether by accident or intent, you show off what gets my heart racing and my loins going. Suddenly, everything else around me is muted. I don’t notice where we are, what we’re doing, or why we’re doing it. My sole focus is on you and your amazing butt.
It begins as something primal. I notice one of your features that I like. It appeals to the animal within, but it acts as the first step to something deeper. In a great butt, I don’t just see a potential lover. I see someone who takes care of themselves. In you, I envision us caring for each other and not just intimately.
So round and firm, it exudes a sexy strength.
So smooth and sensual, it conveys a sexy aura.
So beautiful and grand, it evokes a great passion.
Excited, I lean in as well. I whisper into your ear and offer my loving touch. You respond in kind. Whether your actions were on purpose no longer matters. You sent a message. I received it. Now, we act on it.
You guide my hands to your butt.
I guide yours to mine.
Together, we caress and fondle.
The worlds around us becomes an afterthought. What begins as simple allure transforms into full-blown desire. Like beacons of passion, your butt summons me. Without hesitation, I answer the call. From there, we follow it together.
From a simple motion, our bodies draw us together.
From a primal lust, we respond with targeted touching.
From a greater feeling, we forge a heated love.
A while back, a relative of mine told a story about a college professor and a smart-ass student. The student claimed he was a hardcore nihilist. He genuinely believed that there was no inherent purpose to humanity, life, or the universe. His professor didn’t respond at first. However, that didn’t stop him from making a point and sending a message.
Shortly after that initial encounter, the professor handed out grades on the first paper. He gave the self-professed nihilist a zero. When the student protested the grade, the professor just shrugged and reminded him that he was a nihilist. If he thought nothing mattered, then why should he care about his grades?
Regardless of whether this story is true, it makes an interesting point. That professor, who I suspect a PHD in trolling, exposed his arrogant student’s hypocrisy. He claimed to be a nihilist, but he still cared about his grades. He may have overestimated the extent of his nihilism, but the professor proved it only went so far.
It’s a lesson that’s a lot more relevant today because nihilism, in general, has become oddly fashionable. We have popular TV shows like “Rick and Morty,” “True Detective,” and “Bojack Horseman” that each espouse a certain degree of nihilistic philosophy. Iconic villains like Heath Ledger’s Joker in “The Dark Knight” also embody the random chaos that often reflects the chaos of a nihilistic worldview.
As much as I love the “The Dark Knight” and “Rick and Morty,” including its unique approach to exploring nihilism, there are serious issues with applying their philosophy to real life. These are fictional characters unbound by the logistics and consequences of real life. Nobody could reasonably do what they do and get the same result. We already have enough scary clowns committing crimes.
That hasn’t stopped some people from taking those complex philosophical concepts more seriously than most. It also happens to complement the ongoing rise of trolling, both on the internet and in real life. That makes sense because the mentality of a troll has to be nihilistic to some extent. When your goal is to cross lines and demean people for the thrill of it, you can’t be too concerned with greater meaning.
That’s not to say there aren’t trolls who are genuine sadists. I’ve encountered more than a few who would qualify. For the most part, though, nihilism is an excuse rather than a motivation. Some pretend they just want to watch the world burn when they say something that’s horribly offensive or laughably absurd. They’re just trying and failing to be as charismatic as Heath Ledger’s Joker.
It’s a phony brand of nihilism and one that defeats itself when you apply the slightest bit of scrutiny. It often leads to empty arguments on otherwise serious issues. It usually breaks down like this.
Someone will say something absurd, wrong, or just flat out offensive.
Someone else calls them out on it.
An argument ensues that usually involves an escalating amount of hatred, insults, and frustration.
Ultimately, the person who made the triggering remark claims they’re just in it for the kicks, the cheap thrills, and to taste the tears of their enemies.
In the end, they try to come off as this enlightened, above-it-all intellectual who has somehow transcended the petty arguments that the non-nihilists of the world keep having. They pretend they’re above it all or just don’t care. Again, it’s an excuse. They’re not full-on nihilists in the traditions of Rick Sanchez or Friedrich Nietzsche. They’re just assholes trying to hide from the fact that they’re assholes.
These same people who claim to care nothing about the greater meaning of the universe rarely practice what they so poorly preach. They still pay their taxes. They still work jobs that they probably hate to make money so that they can function in this undeniably flawed society we live in. If they were truly nihilists, they wouldn’t see the point in any of that.
If they got sick, they wouldn’t go to a doctor to get better. What’s the point?
If they lost all their money, they wouldn’t worry. What’s the point?
If their lives were utterly ruined by their behavior, they wouldn’t complain about it. What’s the point?
The phony nihilists pretend they can be Rick Sanchez or Heath Ledger’s Joker. However, they never come close to turning themselves into a pickle or setting fire to a giant pile of money. Those are things that a hardcore nihilist would do and they wouldn’t bother arguing about it. Again, and this is the question that phony nihilists avoid answering, what’s the point?
More and more, nihilism is being used less as a philosophy and more as a rhetorical tactic from trolls. In an era where it’s easy to troll and people are extremely divided, I understand why this brand of phony nihilism is emerging. I can even see why it has an appeal. It allows people to skip the part where they have to justify their beliefs or take responsibility for the actions. It’s more about convenience than conviction.
I don’t expect the trend of phony nihilism to stop anytime soon. If anything, it’s going to intensify as the world becomes increasingly complex on every level. There are over 7.7 billion people on this planet and it’s getting exceedingly difficult to feel like you matter in such a world. Falling into a nihilist trap is easy and even comforting for some.
It’s still not an excuse to be an asshole. Even if you think nothing truly matters and we’re all just globs of matter waiting for the heat death of the universe, you’re alive in this world with billions of other people trying to find their place in it. Being an asshole, whether it’s out of nihilism or some other philosophy, is never justified.
Every Wednesday brings comic book fans a set of new, colorful adventures in a gloriously literal way. Whether you’re a fan of superheroes, fairy tales, zombie apocalypses, or beautiful warrior women in chain mail bikinis, there’s something for everyone. Within that diverse collection of awesome, some books stand out more than others.
This week, it was genuinely difficult to single one comic out for my weekly quick pick. Every comic tries to stand out these days in some form or another. However, in that noble effort, the one comic I feel succeeded most was “Age of X-Man: Amazing Nightcrawler #1.”
It’s somewhat tricky picking a book that’s just a mini-series that’s meant to tie into a larger ongoing event, namely “Age of X-Man.” Anyone who follows comics, especially superhero comics that seem to have major event books every other month, knows that tie-in comics are often hit-or-miss. Most are misses, but “Age of X-Man: Amazing Nightcrawler #1” is definitely one of those rare hits.
You don’t have to know everything about what’s going on with “Age of X-Man” and why the mutants of the Marvel universe are living in a world where giant robots aren’t trying to kill them. All you need to know is that the X-men now live in an alternate universe where mutants are celebrated, idolized, and respected. Thanks to the reality-warping power of Nate Grey, Charles Xavier’s dream isn’t necessary anymore.
Within that Utopian world, don’t just live in peace. They’ll full-fledged celebrities. Among the celebrities of that world, Kurt “Nightcrawler” Wagner is at the top. He’s basically this world’s Leonardo DiCaprio, Chris Pratt, and Hugh Jackman, all rolled into one. Considering how often his story revolves around people being afraid of his appearance, it’s a huge shift.
This isn’t a Nightcrawler who constantly runs from angry protesters who think he’s a demon in need of an exorcist. He’s an A-list celebrity, complete with managers, directors, fans, and a slight detachment from reality. I say slight because the story that transpires in “Age of X-Man: Amazing Nightcrawler #1” feels like something only a celebrity can experience.
Writer, Seanan McGuire, is both coy and cunning in how she explores Nightcrawler’s life in this world. She even borrows from some of the dystopian imagery of the famous Age of Apocalypse story-line that was so iconic for the 90s era X-men. In this world, those dystopian fears aren’t an ever-present concern for the X-men. They’re just fodder for a movie.
In that world, Nightcrawler isn’t overly concerned about mutants being hunted and oppressed. For him, it’s a huge change of pace because in many of the X-men’s struggles, he finds himself on the front line of those conflicts. Look no further than stories like God Loves, Man Kills to see why he’s often the face of those conflicts.
In a sense, Nightcrawler is one of those mutants who has nothing to lose by fighting alongside the X-men. Even if mutants were outlawed and hunted, some of the more normal-looking mutants could escape easily and hide their status. He can’t do that because of his appearance. While that hasn’t stopped plenty of women from finding him sexy, it does define a big part of his character.
In “Age of X-Man: Amazing Nightcrawler #1,” the script is completely flipped. Now, Nightcrawler has everything to lose. He’s a beloved celebrity. Throughout the story, we see that he handles celebrity better than most. He’s not quite on the same level as Tom Hanks, but he’s close.
By every measure, Nightcrawler has everything going for him in this world. However, McGuire drops plenty of subtle hints that there’s something missing from his charmed life. Both his actions and his inner monologues send the distinct message that there’s something missing from his life and it can’t be filled with a prescription.
It’s the kind of struggle that many celebrities deal with. They can have everything, but still feel empty inside. It’s part of what leads them to engage in self-destructive behavior. While Nightcrwaler is no Bojack Horseman, what he ends up doing could cost him dearly. Those who read “Age of X-Man” understand those stakes.
This is one of those rare books that portray an iconic character in a new way. Nightcrawler has always been one of the most likable, endearing characters in the X-men, if not all of Marvel comics. In a world where characters kill their own children, marry clones of their dead girlfriend, and inadvertently kill 5 billion aliens, Nightcrawler is a breath of fresh air.
For once, he’s in a position where he can make mistakes and lose more than just his place on a superhero team. He’s one of those characters who, through a mix of charisma and faith, always seems to do the right thing on instinct. Now, here he is, in a position to make big mistakes that cost him dearly.
It’s an intriguing story that puts a beloved character in an unfamiliar situation. If you’re a Nightcrawler fan, a casual X-men fan, or just think blue fur is sexy, “Age of X-Man: Amazing Nightcrawler #1” checks all the right boxes. Even if you’re just curious about what happens to superheroes in a non-dystopian world, this comic has a lot going for it.
While it’s unlikely that this utopian world will last indefinitely, it’s still interesting to see how certain characters handle themselves in such a world. So much of what defines them is a result of them always having to struggle. By living in a world where all is good, we find out who they really are. Nightcrawler is still lovable, but in the world of Age of X-Man, he’s got way more to lose than most.
There’s this popular, but not entirely flawed notion that sexy moments have to involve heavy exertion. If you’re not putting in effort, working up a sweat, or pushing yourself alongside your lover, then the sexiness of the moment is limited. Given the content of the novels and sexy short stories I’ve written, I can totally appreciate that sentiment.
However, not every sexy moment has to be a test of endurance. It is possible to create an intensely intimate moment just by lying in bed with someone. It doesn’t have to involve a kinky sex act. It doesn’t even have to involve heavy petting or an extensive journey into one another’s anatomy. Sometimes, just lying next to someone is all the intimacy you need.
I can personally attest to this. When I was with my ex-girlfriend, some of the most passionate moments we shared involved just lying together in bed, on a couch, or even on the floor. Whether we were resting or watching a movie together, the feeling of just feeling the warmth of someone else’s body was special to us.
There’s a time and a place for elaborate, intense, and energetic forms of intimacy. The same applies to the simple act of lying in bed with your lover. I feel like that experience deserves more appreciation than it gets. This Daily Sexy Musing is my way of showing just how great that experience can be. Enjoy!
The air is still.
The room is silent.
The world around us is an afterthought.
Right now, we’re just two lovers in bed, resting and relaxing in each other’s warmth.
On this same bed, we’ve shared many moments of heated passion. There have been times when the room shakes, our bodies tremble, and the echo with our voices reverberate from the walls. There are many acts we’ve shared, evoking grunts and sweats that test our resolve. Those are all cherished memories, but so are moments like this.
There’s no need for intense effort.
There’s no need for elaborate gestures.
Just lying next to you, your body within close reach, is sufficient.
The lives we live and share are so tiring. Every day of every week brings new challenges. Somewhere along the line, we must find time to celebrate our love. Just being nearby isn’t enough. Even being close only goes so far. There’s a need for intimacy, connection, and the warm sensations that come with loving touch.
There are many ways to meet those needs. Good lovers find creative ways, but great lovers know the tricks of the trade. They know the simple gestures that convey that loving touch. They can create an act of intimacy with little spectacle, yet immense passion. It requires a great deal of work, but incurs great rewards in the long run.
From romantic pursuit to loving bliss.
From heated moments to peaceful nights.
From epic journeys to ultimate goals.
Lying in bed next to you, exchanging a light touch and a simple gesture, I know how far our love has come. I see in you the lover I worked so hard to pursue and the lover who so gladly shares their life with mine.
We can make love when we want to.
We can seek love when we need to.
For now, we’re content to just lie together and enjoy the love we have.
Slasher movies are one of those frustrating genres that have a lot of overdone tropes, but a handful of gems that really stand out. These movies tend to have a standard formula from which few deviates. There’s a mysterious killer on the loose. A group of attractive young people try to escape. All the promiscuous ones die while the sweet, innocent virgin who never shows her tits survives.
If you’ve seen any slasher movie after the first “Halloween” in 1978, then you’ve seen this play out any number of ways. However, it’s because that formula is so overdone that the first “Happy Death Day” felt so refreshing. When I reviewed this movie, I lauded how it injected fresh nuance into the typical horror/slasher formula. It didn’t completely abandon that formula, but it didn’t play by the rules either.
That approach paid off. The move went onto make over $125 million worldwide, despite having a budget just below $5 million. That’s a pretty good payoff for horror/slasher movie in an era where superhero movies dominate and movies that punish beautiful women for being sexy is losing favor. Not surprisingly, this success warranted a sequel in “Happy Death Day 2U.”
Considering how the first movie wrapped things up so neatly, a sequel comes with greater risk. How do you even build on a story where a young woman is stuck in a time loop where she dies at the hands of a killer every time? After the time loop ends, shouldn’t the story also end? “Happy Death Day 2U” tries to make the case that there’s still room for the story to grow.
By and large, the movie succeeds in telling that story. However, I don’t believe the movie works quite as well as the first in terms of impact and nuance. I admit I was skeptical, and even a little disappointed, when I heard that a sequel was in the works. For a movie that overtly referenced “Groundhog Day,” which never got a sequel, it seemed like it could only be counterproductive.
To some extent, those concerns were vindicated at the start of the movie. One of the things that made “Groundhog Day” such an effective concept was that we never learned what caused the time loop that trapped Phil Connors. While the cause was revealed in the original scrip to the movie, the act of not explaining the cause helped make it an effective plot device.
“Happy Death Day 2U” doesn’t bother with such ambiguity. Within the first half-hour of the movie, we find out what caused Tree Gelbman to get stuck in the time loop that plagued her in the first movie. I won’t spoil too many details. I’ll just say that there’s nothing overly supernatural or subtly spiritual about it.
That’s not to say it still doesn’t work. In fact, I would go so far as to say that it adds an extra level of innovation to the horror/slasher formula that the first “Happy Death Day” did so much to alter. The stakes are different this time around, but the concept is the same. Tree is stuck in a time loop again, but the story has less to do with how she escapes and more to do with the price she pays to do so.
There isn’t quite as much mystery, but there are new complications that add a different kind of intrigue. The nature of the loop and the identity of the killer is different, this time. Motivations and obstacles are different too, but similar enough to build upon the foundation that the first movie established.
While I didn’t care for how “Happy Death Day 2U” explained the time loop, I still found myself genuinely intrigued by Tree’s journey, as well as that of her supporting cast. In the first movie, much like Phil Connors in “Groundhog Day,” Tree starts off as a selfish, arrogant, mean-spirited person who is difficult to root for. Over the course of the movie, though, she becomes more likable.
Tree’s journey in “Happy Death Day 2U” takes it even further by testing her new persona. Instead of becoming a better person by navigating the time loop, Tree is faced with a series of difficult, gut-wrenching choices. Beyond surviving the killer, escaping the time loop means paying a heavy price. Within the moments of bloody violence and messy deaths, she agonizes over that price.
That aspect of the story is what makes “Happy Death Day 2U” worth seeing. Even if it loses something by explaining the source of the time loop, it gains something by building on Tree’s story. We learn more and more about why she was such a self-loathing bitch in the first place, which makes her growth from that persona even more satisfying.
By the end of “Happy Death Day 2U,” it feels like Tree has take yet another step. She shows just how much she has grown, as a result of her experience in the time loop. It also gives even more weight to the blossoming relationship she has with Carter Davis. Her feelings for him and his feelings for her feel a lot more genuine by the time the credits roll.
As meaningful as this kind of character growth is, though, “Happy Death Day 2U” doesn’t hide from the fact that it’s still a slasher movie. Like its predecessor, it’s overtly coy with how it portrays the violence and death scenes. It’s a little gratuitous, at times. It also employs some tongue-in-cheek humor that helps balance things out.
“Happy Death Day 2U” never tries to be too bloody, but never tries to be too funny, either. It takes what the first movie did and builds on the foundation. While it doesn’t feel as novel or innovative as the first, it still captures the overall spirit and style.
The movie still has flaws beyond explaining the cause of the time loop and limiting the overall mystery. Like the first one, this movie feels like it holds back at times. It probably could’ve done a lot more with an R-rating instead of a standard PG-13 rating, but there’s never a sense that the movie attempts to walk a fine line between the two.
In addition, while Tree’s character undergoes plenty of growth, Carter still doesn’t get nearly as much. We still don’t know much about who he is or what makes him tick. He still shows plenty of backbone throughout the movie, stepping up in a way that make him easy to root for, both as a character and as Tree’s love interest. It just feels like he doesn’t get his chance to shine.
There’s also the issue of needing to see the first “Happy Death Day” to understand what’s going on here. This is one of those movies where the prequel really isn’t optional if you want to appreciate everything that happens. In fact, this movie build so much upon the first that it basically acts as an extension more than a sequel.
Those flaws aside, “Happy Death Day 2U” is still a solid movie that took some considerable risks. Those risks paid off in that it further established this franchise a badly-needed shot in the arm for a genre that has become less relevant in recent years. If I had to score this movie, I would give it a solid 4 out of 5.
There is still a place for horror/slasher movies and there probably always will be. “Happy Death Day 2U” demonstrates that there’s still plenty of room for blood, violence, sex appeal, and creepy masked killers in the current cinematic landscape. John Carpenter and Wes Craven may have helped perfect that formula, but “Happy Death Day 2U” adds some new and overdue ingredients.
If aliens ever do land on Earth, our reaction will be highly contingent on how sexually attractive we find them. It’s an inescapable fact of our dirty collective imaginations. We judge someone by how sexually attractive we find them. If a race of aliens looked like Brad Pitt and Jennifer Lawrence, we would approach them differently compared to the little green men of old.
I don’t deny there are some alien women in fiction that I find very attractive. Gamora from “Guardians of the Galaxy,” Liara from “Mass Effect,” and Starfire from DC Comics are just some of the alien women I find sexy. While I understand that’s very unlikely that actual aliens would look anything like women, men, or humans in general, it’s still a popular trope for a reason.
Aliens can be scary, as many movies and TV shows have shown us. They can also have a sexy side. After all, all life needs to survive and reproduce in order to evolve, including aliens. They would have to have some level of sex appeal in order to get that far, even if it takes a form most humans wouldn’t understand.
Regardless of how real aliens might look, there will always be a place in the world of fantasy and sci-fi for sexy aliens. As someone who loves comics, sci-fi, and all things sexy, those kinds of aliens have a special place in my heart. For that reason, and plenty others, I dedicate this edition of my Sexy Sunday Thoughts to the sexy aliens out there, wherever they may be.
“The quality of the sex we have is directly proportional to the necessary effort to get the stains out of our bed sheets.”
“You know you have sex appeal when you can make dirty sweatpants look sexy.”
“Weddings are the only occasions where people encourage close family members to have sex.”
“True love is never hesitating to touch your lover’s dirty underwear.”
“When you think about it, every romantic gesture is directly linked to facilitating an orgasm.”
“As a general rule, if it can be used as a lubricant, it probably has been used in a sex act.”
“Strippers and prostitutes are the only ones who know the actual market value of their bodies.”
We may never know whether we’re truly alone in the universe. Even if we do meet real aliens one day, it’s unlikely they’ll take a form we find inherently sexy. It’s still a fun idea to imagine, a race of aliens that are both extremely advanced and extremely sexy. Fantasy or not, it’s the kind of idea that makes gazing up at the stars that much more awe-inspiring.
The following is a sexy short story I wrote about getting ahead in your career and celebrating it in the sexiest way possible. Enjoy!
“A new day, a new office, and a big promotion,” said Jonathan Zander with a beaming smile. “I’ve earned this!”
It was the culmination of a decade of toil. After working so hard for the most prominent investment firm in the state, he had achieved something that had once seemed impossible. He started as an intern, getting people coffee, printing out presentations, and organizing meetings for low pay and no overtime. Now, he was a full-fledged executive director, complete with a yearly bonus, his own parking spot, and a private office.
It might not have been the biggest office in the building, but it was still a major step up from the cramped cubical he’d worked in as an intern. It had once belonged to his supervisor, who had mentored him for the past seven years. He had since retired and was instrumental in helping Jonathan get the promotion. The office had been empty for over a month, but he intended to make it distinctly his.
“I’ll put my diploma over there,” Jonathan said to himself, pointing out blank spaces on the wall, “and that picture of me and my dad at the Super Bowl will go there. I can maybe get some artwork from my sister if she has any, but I can just as easily get some from that convention next week. And this time, I’ll actually be able to afford it!”
He kept on smiling, even as he set his box of personal effects on the large mahogany desk. He was still getting used to the idea of not being underpaid. He’d spent the last decade paying down his student loan debts and living frugally in rented apartments with unreliable roommates. That was about to change. Jonathan already planned to move into his own place by the end of the month. That was just the beginning.
“With a fat bonus comes a new suite, better furniture, and maybe even a new car at some point,” Jonathan said to himself, his mind still racing from all the exciting possibilities. “It will be nice to actually drive to work in something that isn’t 12 years old and bought at a discount from my grandfather.”
He’d worked so hard to find success doing what he loved. He intended to enjoy the hell out of it.
As an executive, there was no dead end to his job. Jonathan was no longer just some replaceable office grunt. He had influence, authority, and flexibility. He could help direct the company forward and reap the inevitable rewards. That was what he had wanted after seeing his father toil with the post office for decades. He sought more and he was willing to work for it.
There would be plenty of time for that later on, though. At the moment, it was Friday evening and most of the staff had already left for the day. Jonathan was tempted to join them, but opted to get a head start on setting up his new work space. He was too excited to just go home and wait for the next phase of his career to begin. Looking out his window, which had an awesome view of the park space just outside the building, he marveled at how far he had come.
“All that hard work…the late nights, the impossible deadlines, and the coffee enemas…I did way more than I thought I could do,” Jonathan mused. “My dad told me that hard work can’t just be for the sake of working. It has to be for something greater. Guess it’s up to me to figure out how great it’ll be.”
That was still the most daunting prospect of his new job. Jonathan had spent so much time working for others. The idea that others would work for him in the name of his vision for the company still hadn’t sunk in. He had to adjust quickly because there was plenty more he hoped to achieve.
“Excuse me, Mr. Zander?” said an unexpected female voice. “Do you have a moment?”
Jonathan turned around to see a young woman standing in the doorway to his new office. She looked like one of those cute secretaries the old CEO loved to hire, complete with a low-cut skirt, polished heels, and a blouse that seemed a size too small. Never one to turn away from a pretty girl, he welcomed her in.
“Sure,” he said to her. “Come on in. Are you one of Sheila Grant’s new assistance in HR?”
“No. I’m actually a…well, I guess you could call me an office temp,” she said coyly.
“Oh? What kind of temp?”
“The kind your old boss hired for the sole purpose of celebrating your promotion,” she told him.
Jonathan was taken aback, somewhat. He recognized the undertone in that woman’s voice. He had been to his share of bachelor parties to know what it implied. Upon seeing the woman close the door to his office behind her and lock it, he began filling in the blanks.
It seemed outrageous. He’d heard rumors about certain people hiring strippers and prostitutes for executives, but Jonathan thought they were just perverse water cooler talk. Now that he was an executive, though, those rumors took on a very different meaning.
“My name is Daisy,” the woman continued. “I guess you could call me a ‘personal motivator.’ I specialize in helping aspiring executives stay driven, so to speak.”
“That sounds…useful,” Jonathan said, not acknowledging the overt innuendo in her tone. “How exactly do you go about that?”
The young woman casually walked over to him, revealing in the process that the top part of her blouse was already unbuttoned, exposing her ample cleavage. It was, by no means, appropriate office attire. However, Jonathan felt little inclination to report her to HR. If anything, he had a feeling that his old supervisor had circumvented HR.
The way she walked did not imply that she had come directly from business school. The way she swayed her hips and glared at him with seductive eyes made it seem like she’d come right from a strip club. Knowing as that there was a strip club less than four blocks from the office, the possibilities were plenty feasible.
When she reached him, she stood so close that her ample breasts actually touched his chest. He could already smell the makeup, eye-liner, and high-end lipstick. Still standing by the window, Jonathan didn’t move in inch in any direction.
“I could spend the next half-hour explaining my unique talents,” Daisy told him, skillfully snaking her arms around his neck, “or I could just show you.”
“That might be optimal,” Jonathan said, already sounding like an executive. “In my experience, people learn by doing and not listening.”
“I couldn’t agree more. That’s why I think you’ll love my technique!”
The attractive young woman ditched the innuendo from that point and lured him into a kiss. As soon as her lips touched his, he was intoxicated by the intensely sensual taste. It was like tasting literal success, so sweet and rewarding. Whether or not Daisy was the literal manifestation of his success was a matter of perspective…one that he did not care to rationalize at the moment.
Kissing her did more than just affirm his success. It got all the blood in his body flowing in a certain direction. That reminded him that he was a healthy heterosexual man who hadn’t had time for a relationship. His work made finding love – or meaningless sex, for that matter – a challenge subject to serious time constraints. Having not known the intimate touch of a woman for a while, it was nothing short of refreshing.
“Mmm…I like it already!” Jonathan said after their lips parted.
“Oh I’m just getting started, Mr. Zander,” Daisy said, sounding sexy, yet serious. “Have a seat. The real presentation is about to begin!”
She kissed him again, snaking her arms around his neck in the process. He boldly returned the gesture, slipping his hands around her waist and feeling up her womanly curves over that not-so-modest dress of hers. As he felt her up, she guided him away from the window and towards his new desk. Jonathan offered no resistance, going along with Daisy’s unusual technique.
He soon found himself sitting on the edge of his desk, his legs dangling over as the young woman stood in front of him. His hands still on her waist, he could already feel his pants tightening. Daisy even seemed to realize that and grazed her thigh up against the growing bulge.
“Hold still,” she said upon breaking the kiss again. “This office getup is feeling very itchy.”
Then, her seductive gaze never once diverting from him, Daisy began taking off her clothes. She didn’t do it casually, either. She was slow and sensual, strategically unbuttoning her blouse so that he could watch her breasts steadily tumble out. She was just as subtle when she unzipped the back of her skirt, turned around, and casually slid it off down her thighs, revealing a red G-string thong that perfectly augmented her shapely butt.
It confirmed what Jonathan had suspected. She was a stripper, most likely one that his old boss had hired before for other executives. Given how comfortable she was stripping in a stranger’s office, Jonathan surmised she had done it before and gotten it down to a system.
“Well, that’s one way to deal with uncomfortable office clothes,” he joked.
“Speak for yourself, Mr. Casual-Friday,” Daisy teased while feeling up the in-seam of his custom-made suit.
“It’s not that bad,” he said, “although it does get a little confining when it’s this hot.”
“Well, in that case, why don’t I help with that?”
Jonathan didn’t say a word. He just cast her a goofy grin, which told her everything he needed to tell her. Looking quite comfortable in her bra and thong underwear, Daisy went to work undoing his belt, unzipping his pants, and pulling them down to his ankles, boxers and all.
His semi-erect manhood freed, Jonathan already felt a light sweat forming on his forehead. As Daisy narrowed her gaze on his lower anatomy, he quickly undid his tie and unbuttoned his dress shirt.
“Oh my,” she said playfully. “You keep that confined in those tight pants all day? You have earned this promotion!”
“I like to think that’s one of the reasons I’ve earned it,” he quipped.
“Well, it looks like it needs some professional attention. Lean back a bit and I’ll get the job done.”
“I look forward to seeing you demonstrate your skills.”
They both laughed at their shared tone. It resembled that of an executive and an assistant in a serious business meeting. It would’ve been cheesy if Jonathan didn’t enjoy it so much. He even found it extra arousing, although that might have just been a byproduct of not having sex for so long.
That wait was almost over, though. As he fumbled to get his shirt off, Daisy dropped to her knees and began giving him oral sex. She made it clear from the beginning, though, that she was a true pro.
“Oohhh, Ms. Daisy!” Jonathan moaned. “Your skills…they’re amazing!”
The beautiful woman glanced up at him, showing an eagerness and motivation that any executive could respect. She wanted his approval, just as he had wanted approval from his former boss and she really worked for it.
She was so thorough, grasping the base of his shaft with one hand while stroking the shaft with the other. She carefully, but fervently worked her lips along the length of his dick, using her tongue to stimulate all those sensitive areas. It felt so good, sending shudders of bliss coursing through his body.
Jonathan had barely managed to get his shirt off, now leaning back on his desk as he soaked in the feeling. He watched her work with such dedication. At one point, she released her grip on the base of his shaft and used it to undo her bra.
“Looks like I’ll need more advanced techniques,” Daisy said intently.
He just grinned back at her in approval, watching as those voluptuous breasts of hers hung free. He couldn’t tell whether they were real. He didn’t really care, though. Daisy showed that she knew how to use them, positioning his dick right between her fleshy mounds and using them to initiate a full-fledged tit-fuck.
“Ohhh yeah!” Jonathan moaned. “That feels…so advanced.”
“Like I said…I’m a professional,” Daisy said seductively.
Up and down, his manhood slid smoothly between her breasts. He still couldn’t determine whether they were natural or fake. He honestly couldn’t care less.
Blissful moans soon morphed into labored grunts. His dick went from just erect to rock hard. Daisy certainly took notice. She even seemed to take pride in it, being able to get a man that aroused with her tits and mouth. It was the mark of a true professional, which seemed quite fitting, given the circumstances.
“Wow! Talk about hard work paying off,” Daisy said.
“Hard…that’s for sure,” said Jonathan, already breathless.
“You worked just as hard to get here, Mr. Zander. Hard work should be rewarded. That’s what I intended to give you.”
“You mean you haven’t already?”
“Are you kidding? That was just the appetizer. Now, it’s time for the main course!”
With a lurid tone in her voice and a seductive glint in her eye, Daisy rose back to her feet and kicked off her heels. She then turned around, showing him that perfect ass of hers again, and slid off her thong.
Jonathan’s mouth watered at the sight of her butt and pussy. He even noticed that she was aroused, a sign that she was among the lucky few in the world who actually enjoyed her job. That didn’t just give them something in common. It put them on the same page.
“Tell me, Mr. Zander,” said Daisy, turning around and showing him all her naked glory. “How do you want to celebrate your promotion?”
“If I had to choose,” Jonathan said, already enchanted by the sight, “I’d pick you up in my arms, set you down on my fancy new desk, and fuck you until I came all over your tits.”
“Is that so?” she said curly. “Well, you’re in luck. That just happens to be my kind of celebrating!”
Now, it was Jonathan’s turn to grin playfully. Throwing aside his dress shirt and kicking off his overpriced shoes, the newly-minted executive got off the desk and seized the moment in the name of celebrating his success.
He slipped his arms around Daisy, savoring the feeling of her naked skin pressing up against his, and kissed her intently. She eagerly kissed back, jumping up into his arms and throwing her legs around his waist. He instinctively caught her, which also gave him a perfect grip on her butt. It left him feeling empowered, the flesh of a naked woman pressing meshing with his. Jonathan longed to exercise that power, celebrating the promotion that he worked so hard to earn.
As their lips and tongues twirled in their lustful embrace, he set her down on the polished desk in the exact position he’d been in moments ago. Daisy kept her legs wrapped around his waist, clinging to his shoulders as he positioned himself in front of her, aligning his dick with her wet entrance.
“You ready?” he asked her, his every word radiating with lust.
“Let the celebrating begin!” Daisy proclaimed.
Heeding her words, Jonathan grabbed hold of her waist and thrust his hips forward, driving his throbbing cock into her. In an instant, he felt the hot warmth of womanly flesh surrounding his manhood. The process was so smooth, his arousal complementing hers. They each let out a blissful moan. From there, they the real celebration began.
His feet planted firmly on the freshly-cleaned rug, Jonathan began humping the beautiful woman in his grasp. Together, their naked bodies rocked in a vigorous rhythm. Like a well-oiled piston, his cock pumped within her pussy. The sound of his pelvis smacking against hers filled the room, along with the light squeaking noise of the fancy desk. Something about that motivated him to intensify the movements, as though it were a manifestation of his hard work.
“Yes! Ohhh yes!” Daisy cried out. “That’s it! Fuck me! Fuck me like a big, strong executive! Ooh I’m coming already!”
She could’ve been faking it. She probably was, but she sure sounded convincing. Jonathan could feel her inner folds throbbing around his dick. The gasps turned to squeals. Rather than just cling to his shoulders, she dug her nails right into his skin. It strong, but in the best possible way.
Fake or not, Jonathan felt even more motivated. Shifting his hands from her waist to her thighs, he pushed he legs farther apart so he could thrust in deeper. He also kissed down her neck, tasting the light sweat that had already formed on her skin. More moans followed. It was like the sweetest music coupled with his favorite treat, the ultimate desert to go along with a momentous event.
“Daisy,” Jonathan grunted, “you like being fucked…by an executive?”
“Yes! I love it! I fucking love it!” she affirmed with surprising enthusiasm.
“Then that’s…how I’ll fuck you!”
In another show of his newfound authority, Jonathan withdrew his cock from her briefly so that he could reposition the naked woman in his grasp. With strength he didn’t remember having before he got promoted, he pulled her off the desk, turned her around, and bent her over so that her breasts were mashed up against the polished wood. Now facing that heart-shaped ass of hers, he thrust his cock back into her and resumed his vigorous humping.
“Oh yeah! Ohhh fuck yeah!” Jonathan seethed. “This…is how…an executive fucks!”
Daisy responded with more blissful moans. He already sounded like a new man, one far removed from the quiet intern he’d been ten years ago. He’d worked hard to become that man and he was already loving it.
Daisy must have loved it too. In fact, she seemed to have a fetish for powerful men in business. She kept loudly proclaiming that she was having an orgasm. The more she said it, the less certain he was that she was faking it. That might have been due to his position in a major company and not his sexual prowess, but Jonathan didn’t care. If he could celebrate his promotion and make a beautiful woman climax, then that was just an awesome bonus.
He worked just as hard to make their sex both memorable and momentous. As the desk shook and Daisy’s body rocked, Jonathan felt himself approaching his peak. It might have been the most intense peak he’d felt since his ex-girlfriend dressed up as a sexy librarian in college. It was like a volcano ready to erupt and, like his promotion, it required a little extra effort to achieve it.
“Daisy! I…I’m close!” he told her. “I’m ready…to come!”
“I’m ready too, Mr. Zander,” Daisy replied.
With their lusts perfectly in synch, Jonathan pulled out of her again and she quickly turned around so that she could drop her to knees again. Just as before, she put those voluptuous breasts of hers to good use, pressing his throbbing cock between them. From that position, he slid his manhood between those fleshy mounds of his until he crossed that final threshold.
After those fateful words, the volcano of pent up desire erupted. Holding onto her head, Jonathan closed his eyes and threw his head back as the feeling washed over him like a tsunami of pure ecstasy. It was incredible, his throbbing releasing a thick load of cum onto the beautiful woman’s amble cleavage. From head to toe, the sensations rippled through his body in a surge of pleasure, power, and accomplishment.
The volume of manly fluid surprised Daisy as much as it did him. She even gasped somewhat at how much ended up on her face. It had definitely been a while for him. A lot of feelings had been pent up in his effort to advance his career. As tough as it had been, the end result was worth it…even if it was somewhat messy.
“Wow!” Daisy said. “So much cum…you really did work hard for this.”
“Yeah…hard,” he said, still an orgasmic daze.
They both laughed somewhat as Daisy used her tits to extract every last drop from his manhood. She even made sure to lick up the bits that lingered. Once the ecstasy passed, Jonathan let out the most content sigh he had experienced in over a decade.
He ended up leaning back on his desk, sitting down on the floor next to the naked woman who still had his cum dripping from her tits. She didn’t seem to mind, though. She even pulled him into a light embrace, as if to offer once last round of congratulations for what he achieved.
“A job well done, Mr. Zander,” she told him.
“Speak for yourself, Ms. Daisy,” Jonathan laughed.
“You’re going to make a great executive here. I look forward to celebrating your future achievements with you.”
“So do I,” he told her, “and don’t worry. I’ll have plenty of achievements worth celebrating in the future. I promise!”