This year has been objectively terrible, but there’s still time to for it to end feeling slightly less awful. Among the many casualties of this year has been the release of “Wonder Woman 1984.” This movie was supposed to come out back in May. Then, a global pandemic hit and everything wonderful was either cancelled or pushed back.
However, there’s only so much you can do to push back Wonder Woman. Pandemic or not, her wonder is worth fighting for. That includes pushing through with a theatrical release. I don’t care how many masks I have to wear. I don’t care how many times I need to dip my hands in soap and/or hand sanitizer. I’m going to see this movie in a goddamn theater. This final trailer only proves why.
When I was a kid, one of the most obscene, deplorable things in media was Mortal Kombat. This video game was deemed so obscene, so violent, and so utterly wrong that it would destroy an entire generation.
Not long after that, it was the overly sexual attire that Brittney Spears wore in her music videos. Apparently, that was deemed too graphic for a generation to handle. It was going to corrupt everyone with horribly impure thoughts about sexuality.
Again, having been young at the time, I’m insulted. Then again, there was one a time when Elvis’ hips were deemed too sexual. We, as a society, still have a lot of issues to overcome with respect to sex. It still makes us uncomfortable and uptight. It makes adults afraid for their children and children afraid of their own bodies. This is not new.
Now, let me make a quick note on Cardi B’s recent song and music video, “WAP.” For those not up on the acronyms, “WAP” stands for Wet Ass Pussy. I’ll give everyone who had one too many health lessons from priests, rabbis, mullahs, and republicans a moment to stop gasping. I’ll give another for the uptight regressive whiners on the left who think anything overtly sexual is somehow damaging to women.
Everybody okay? Good, because I think we should all take a step back and take a deep breath, while we’re at it.
Let me start by saying I’m not a big fan of Cardi B. I don’t like her music or her style, but I totally respect her effort. It’s not easy to achieve the status she has achieved. It’s even harder to stay relevant at a time like this when the dumbest things start trending for no reason.
Even though I’m not a fan, I still find myself respecting her more for the reaction she garnered for this song. From Ben Shapiro to Tucker Carlson, the people who often ally themselves with fun-hating religious zealots who seem to want women to be 1950s housewives are aghast at this song. That shouldn’t surprise anyone. These are the same people who whined about Dungeons and Dragons, for crying out loud.
What should be concerning, though, is how their reaction seems to imply they don’t know how female bodies work. It’s one thing to be ignorant about sexuality in general, but it’s not like Cardi B’s song is breaking new ground. Popular music has had graphic depictions of sex acts and genitalia for decades. Cardi B is just the latest. She just happens to be more overt than most when it comes to depicting female genitalia.
I know that’s going to make a certain crowd very uncomfortable, but so long as they’re thinking about Cardi B and wet ass pussies, I think this is a good time to remind them of something.
Just like male genitalia getting hard, female genitalia getting wet and moist is part of the process.
In general, that’s a good thing. If a woman is going to enjoy sex, it’s important that she be aroused. That’s why foreplay is so important for both parties during sex. Whether you’re gay, straight, or something in between, this is basic human anatomy. None of this is a medical secret. Anyone can look up the process of female arousal, provided they can sift through the porn.
Cardi B singing a song about why it’s awesome is no different than a male singer celebrating how great it is to have a dick. There’s nothing wrong with, either. We’re all naked underneath our clothes. We all have certain parts of our bodies that garner more attention than others.
It’s okay to celebrate our bodies.
It’s okay to be horny, aroused, or excited.
It’s even okay to know your body well enough to understand what makes it feel good.
I know that’s always been a sore point for some people. The female body is still very taboo. Why else would we still censor female nipples? The idea of women enjoying sex is also taboo, thanks largely to some of those awkward feelings I mentioned earlier. It’s a big reason why we have an orgasm gap.
I’m not saying Cardi B’s song will do anything to mend that gap or temper the taboos surrounding the female body. I’m just think this is a good opportunity to acknowledge how awkward we still are about female genitalia. There are some reasons for that, but few are good or valid.
Female genitalia gets wet when aroused. It’s a good thing, in general. Women understanding how their bodies work is healthy and necessary. There will always be songs and media about the female form, as well as the male form. You can whine about it all you want. That’s not going to change anything.
Also, let this also be a teachable moment for men, women, and everything in between about the value of understanding your partner’s body. At the very least, let us all offer some sympathy and understanding to Ben Shapiro’s wife.
Today, it’s Cardi B’s wet ass pussy.
Yesterday, it was Elvis’ hips.
We have a long way to go with respect to appreciating and understanding sexuality. Let this be a step in that process.
The following is a video I made for my YouTube channel, Jack’s World. It’s a video version of an article I wrote a while back. I added and removed a few details to the video. If necessary, I’ll do a follow-up. Enjoy!
This has been a bittersweet summer, to say the least. This might be the first summer since college where I haven’t been able to go on a real, actual vacation. It’s disappointing and distressing. I badly want to go to the beach, hit up a beach bar, or just visit some friends or relatives out of state. I haven’t been able to do any of that this year, due to the goddamn pandemic.
However, I don’t just want to lament at how this has been a lost summer. I like to think I’ve made the most of it, despite being stuck at home for the most part. There are ways to enjoy summer without going to the beach. They aren’t always as fun or fulfilling, but they still work.
In lieu of bemoaning my lack of vacation travels this summer, I thought I’d share a brief personal story. It’s not entirely pleasant, but it’s not overly awful either. It’s just one of those memories that stands out more than most and for reasons that are sure to become abundantly clear. It involves the beach, sunburn, and how a simple oversight can cause plenty of discomfort.
This particular memory takes place a number of years ago around the 4th of July. That year, I decided to head up to the beach to celebrate the holiday weekend. The weather was perfect. The food was as delicious as it was unhealthy. There were no masks, social distancing, or angry fights that broke out when someone sneezed. Good times, indeed.
Needless to say, I was looking forward to a relaxing trip. On my first full day there, I was set to spend most of the day out on the sand with my dad. Since it was sunny and over 90 degrees out, we both made it a point to go heavy on sunscreen. For me, that’s somewhat challenging. I burn very easily and I’ve had many vacations undermined by nasty sunburns. At this point, though, I’d gotten pretty good at protecting myself.
On this day, I thought I did everything right. I lathered up as much as I could. I even used extra for good measure. I did not want to get burned. I wanted this trip to be memorable for all the right reasons. I thought I succeeded. The fact I smelled like a coconut for hours should’ve been proof of that.
Sadly, I was wrong.
I didn’t know it at the time, but there was one part of my body that I neglected. Trust me, it’s not the part your thinking. It was the top parts of my feet.
This may sound like a trivial oversight. Trust me, it isn’t and I had to learn that the hard way. I didn’t know it at the time, though. I just went about my day of surf, sand, and relaxation. My dad and I had an awesome time. We just lofted about without a care in the world, enjoying the summer sun at the beach. It was pure nirvana.
I only started to realize my oversight shortly after we got back. I realized the top parts of my feet were stinging. I wasn’t sure why until I kicked off my flip-flops. That’s when I saw it. A distinct pattern of red sunburn had formed all over the top of my feet. At the time, I just thought it was a mild inconvenience. I didn’t get burned anywhere else, so I thought I had avoided the worst.
Again, I was wrong.
It turns out that getting sunburned on the top of your feet is one of the worst places to get it. It’s not just that it makes wearing socks and shoes a lot more painful. The simple act of taking a shower, stretching your legs, or sleeping under the covers at night became a test in pain tolerance. At least on your back and arms, you can apply ointment or creams to alleviate the pain. It’s not as easy on your feet.
I won’t say this ruined my trip. I still had fun. It just complicated it. I had to be a lot more careful when it came to putting on socks and wearing flip-flops. I had to take lukewarm showers for a while. I also couldn’t go in any hot tubs. It was a bummer, but I got through it.
Thankfully, the pain only lingered for a few days. However, once my skin started peeling, it made for some interesting challenges with laundry. I’m pretty sure I had to throw away at least three pairs of socks after that trip. It was not a pleasant experience, but it did teach me a valuable lesson.
When it comes to applying sunscreen, do not skip the tops of your feet. You do not want to get burned there.
For those lucky enough to still have access to a beach, I hope you heed this advice. For those stuck in place, like me, try to remember it when this crisis is finally over. Next summer, we’ll have a chance to make up for all the time we’ve lost this year. Just be careful. You don’t want to get burned in the wrong place.
Growing up, you learn vital life lessons from strange sources. For those my age, we all probably remember those after school specials or those public service announcements. They usually amounted to things like “eat your vegetables,” “listen to your parents,” and “hating someone because they’re different is wrong!” It was very preachy and crude. Most of us just rolled our eyes and went back to being kids.
Looking back on my youth, I don’t think those life lessons really taught me anything I didn’t already know. In fact, I think the most useful life lessons I learned back then came from comics. I still knew that comics could be preachy too. They always have been, despite what the assholes at associated with certain hashtags may claim. They just got their point across in a different way.
Personally, I think that way was more effective. The stories in comics didn’t just tell you to be honest, selfless, and kind. They showed you why those values are important and dared to have some fun along the way. Within the stories, you learn why Captain America and Superman’s altruism is so powerful. You also learn why Lex Luthor and the Red Skull’s selfish narcissism is so bad.
That really helped shape my understanding of right, wrong, friendship, tolerance, and understanding. My parents, friends, and teachers all played a part too. However, the stories I read in comic books made those life lessons fun and engaging. That’s not to say every comic teaches valuable lessons. If you try to learn life lessons from Deadpool, you will get mixed messages.
Those messages are still there, along with plenty of life lessons. More and more unfold every week with every New Comic Book Day. Once again, I offer to you my pull list and pick of the week. There are life lessons to be had. Even if they just involve how to kill zombies, they’re worth learning. Enjoy!
The current state of the world sucks. Let’s all admit that.
The state of that world isn’t going to get substantially better anytime soon. Let’s concede that point, as well.
On top of that, kids and teenagers are set to go back to school in a few week, albeit in a very unusual capacity.
I remember going back to school. It was often one of the worst days of the year for me, even without a pandemic. However, even during these objectively awful times, there are still some glimmers of awesome from those who make the effort.
Case and point, I’d like to share this uplifting tidbit with you in hopes that it will make these times a bit less awful. It comes courtesy of Dr. Lee, an Alabama principal who is set to welcome his students back to class in a few weeks. However, a simple statement and some empty platitudes aren’t enough for him. He’s too cool for that.
So, despite the horrible situation with a global pandemic, he offers something that’s both informative and just plain awesome. He makes a parody video of MC Hammer’s “U Can’t Touch This” for returning students. I wish I could put into words how incredible this is during these dark times. Instead, I’ll just post the link here and let the awesome speak for itself.
On behalf of your students, former high school students, and everyone else who is sick of the long string of terrible news, I thank you Dr. Lee. You’re making the world a better place by being so cool. The Hammer would be proud.
We also accept that there’s no way to definitely end this pandemic without a vaccine. That’s why many people, including myself, follow any news about potential vaccines closely. It’s easy to get excited when we hear about the progress some organizations have made. It’s even tempting to think that we’re close.
Avoid that temptation because, if you take the bigger picture into account, we’re not that close. It’s very likely that we’ll be without a proven vaccine for the rest of the year. It’s for that same reason that you should take Russia’s announcement of a successful vaccine, which it dubbed Sputnik V, with immense skepticism.
I’m not just saying that as an American or as someone who has mixed opinions about Russia and its autocratic government. Believe me, I’d love it if this vaccine were as effective as Russian claimed. I’d gladly celebrate it and commend Vladimir Putin’s knack for “motivating” development. That’s how much I want this pandemic to end.
However, there are some very good reasons to be cautious about this claim. Forget, for a second, that it’s coming from Russia, a country with an extensive history of large-scale disinformation campaigns. Just consider this simple scenario.
Imagine if someone walked up to you and claimed they had an app on their phone that could predict lotto numbers. You’re both intrigued and impressed. You ask for proof that it works. That person refuses to give it. They also ask for information about the program. They only give you the barest of basics, which you can’t verify.
Would you be willing to accept that this program works?
Moreover, would you be willing to accept it if doing so meant risking your life and that of your entire community?
That’s why practically every major health organization on the planet isn’t celebrating just yet. They’re not completely discounting it, though. There is a genuine interest in reviewing the data. That’s critical since this isn’t some fancy space probe. This is something we’re injecting into living human beings. We need to make sure it’s safe. Otherwise, we could end up causing more suffering than we prevent.
Beyond just causing a spike in cases, due largely to a false sense of security, an ineffective vaccine could undermine the public’s faith in public health. Vaccines have already been subject to all sorts of negative scrutiny in recent years. If this vaccine proves less-than-effective, it could set public health back years and lots of people will die because of that.
That’s what’s at stake here. There’s a time to rush something and a time to take bold risks. This isn’t one of them. Public health and medical science is not something we can rush. This isn’t like going to the moon or breaking the sound barrier. Those efforts required risks, but that risk was taken on by a few willing and brave individuals.
When it comes to medicine, the risks go beyond the test subjects. We cannot and should not take big risks when millions of lives are potentially at stake. This virus has already killed way too many people. Buying into a vaccine before we know for sure it’s effective could ultimately kill even more.
I’ll say it again. I want this pandemic to end as much as anyone. I want this vaccine to work as well as the Russian government claims. However, I’m not prepared to roll up my sleeve until those claims are verified. I encourage others to exercise similar caution.
Every love story is unique. It’s even more so for the sexier kind of love stories. As an aspiring erotica/romance writer, I’ve come to appreciate the broad spectrum of those stories. Some are more dramatic than others, but not every love story, sexy or otherwise, needs to involve fairy tale endings that involve life-long romance.
Every once in a while, a quick fling that lasts only a few days, if that, can be just as meaningful. It’s not the same kind of romance you get with stories involving star-crossed lovers, but it can be just as compelling. I’ve seen real people experience brief, but passionate flings that barely last a few days. Even though it doesn’t work out long-term, it still has a profound impact.
Personally, I haven’t had too many of those flings in my life. That’s more a side-effect of the poor social skills I wielded for the first half of my life than anything else. However, I’ve seen enough of them play out with others, including a few close friends and relatives, to appreciate their worth. In terms of romance, it may not be the most epic, but it can still be fun.
I know it’s hard to have a fling of any kind, given the current state of the world. One day, hopefully soon, it will be possible again. Given how isolated we’ve all been for the past several months, I think we all could use one. To that end, here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to get you in a romantic, fling-loving mood. Enjoy!
“Isn’t it counterproductive for a romantic evening to wear clothes that are hard to get out of?”
“A friendly divorce is as logical as a horny asexual.”
“Virtual sex is just a much more vivid wet dream.”
“How much porn someone has on their hard drive is not as revealing as what percentage of that drive is used to store it.”
“Hate sex is basically aggressive orgasm seeking.”
“There are remarkably few socially acceptable ways to compliment someone’s genitals.”
“Porn has completely misconstrued how sexy taking a shower actually is most of the time.”
In case I haven’t made it clear enough, this year fucking sucks. I want nothing more than to purge the year 2020 from my memory. Every week, it seems, a new brand of awful emerges to crush our collective spirits. Most of it stems from the global pandemic that has cancelled damn near everything we love.
Some of those cancellations hurt more than others. Personally, I can endure going a year without the NCAA basketball tournament. I can even endure NBA and NHL playoffs getting pushed back. Those are painful, but they’re bearable.
Then, there’s the New York Comic Con. Losing that is a different kind of pain. Losing that hurts me on a level that I cannot put into words. I’ve been bracing for it ever since the San Diego Comic Con got cancelled.
Finally, it became official and still, it hurts. As bad as this year has been, this just makes it utterly irredeemable.
New York Comic Con’s physical presence is canceled this year. The annual convention typically takes place in Manhattan’s Javits Center. Organizers announced today, however, that “it likely comes as no surprise that NYCC 2020’s physical event at the Javits will not be able to run as intended.”
Because of the pandemic, all major events this year — including Google I/O, E3, and SXSW — have come to a stop. Organizers canceled San Diego Comic-Con in April for the first time in 50 years in favor of an online event. NYCC will follow suit with an online-only event, taking place October 8th-11th, through an online portal dubbed New York Comic Con’s Metaverse. “We are partnering with YouTube to bring to life four days of incredible content from the biggest studios, publishers and creators in the business,” organizers said.
Although digital is the best effort any event can safely make, events like Comic Con are social affairs. The fun for many fans is dressing up, seeing favorite celebrities in person, and spending time with fellow geeks. Online events are also ripe for logistical problems; SDCC’s online event, which took place late last month, had streams taken down due to copyright claims or required fans to have access to several streaming platforms.
I’ll say it again and I’ll belabor it as much as I damn well please. This hurts me. This hurts me a lot. I don’t care for some live “virtual” event. That didn’t work for San Diego. It’s not going to work here, either. Having a virtual comic convention is like having a virtual massage. It’s just not physically possible.
I’ve been going to the New York Comic Con every year since 2012. I’ve documentedsome of those trips. What makes it worth going to has less to do with the news that often comes out of these conventions and everything to do with the experience. You cannot replicate that with a fucking livestream video that cuts out and gets interrupted by shitty insurance commercials ever 20 minutes. You just can’t.
You go to congregate with your fellow fans.
You go to share a colorful, engaging experience with people who share your interests.
You go to meet new people, bond over your hobbies, and enjoy the many activities that you can experience in New York City.
Now, I’m not the most socially capable person on the planet, but at the New York Comic Con, I feel like I can connect with anyone. I can make new friends, flirt with cute girls, and share memorable moments. It’s an experience surrounded by spectacle. There’s just so much to see and do. The idea of not being able to do it this year is just soul-crushing.
I get why it can’t go on. Given the crowds at the New York Comic Con, it’s not exactly easy to social distance. We’re in a pandemic. Thousands have died and thousands more are likely to die before all is said and done. It’s awful. It’s taking lives and destroying the things that make life worth living.
There’s no upside. There’s no hope, aside from waiting another year, assuming the world is still intact. I’m willing to be patient, but my spirit is now fully and utterly crushed. The New York Comic Con is cancelled this year and everything is worse. There’s nothing more to say.
The following is a video I made for my channel, Jack’s World. It was originally going to be one of my comic gems, but given the scope and scale of the Power Rangers comics in recent years, I felt it warranted something bigger and mightier. Enjoy!
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