Tag Archives: Jack Fisher

Climate Change Is Real And I’m Old Enough To Feel Its Impact

Rising U.S. concern about climate change is mostly among Democrats | Pew  Research Center

Science is a long, laborious, and often tedious process. That’s to be expected. It is, by far, the most effective tool that humanity has in terms of gaining greater knowledge and understanding the world around us.

It’s not always intuitive. There are times when science has revealed just how wrong we were. It’s not that we were all stupid beforehand. We just didn’t have all the data. We could only assume as much as our current understanding allowed.

That’s fine.

That doesn’t make anyone a bad or ignorant person for having held those assumptions.

Science, by its nature, is a self-correcting process. It doesn’t assume anything. It’s always taking in new information, running more tests, and expanding on previous hypotheses. Most of the time, it affirms what we already suspected. Sometimes, though, it completely defies everything we thought we knew.

For that reason, some people just love pointing out all the times science was supposedly wrong to cling to dogmatic assumptions like creationism and Flat-Eartherism. These people really are idiots and they’re often asshole grifters who don’t deserve the slightest bit of sympathy.

Then, there are the climate change deniers. They’re not just skeptics, which I can understand to some extent. They’re outright deniers in that they work under the assumption that the whole study of climate change is a hoax or some environmentalist conspiracy.

Now, not everyone in that camp is a stupid asshole grifter who probably leans conservative and has connections to oil companies. Those people are certainly there and they deserve plenty of scorn. At the same time, I’m willing to give the benefit of the doubt to some who just can’t see the forest from the trees.

To the latter, I’d like to share my own personal testimony that I hope will improve your understanding of the topic. Whether you believe it or not, climate change is a serious issue that could have serious consequences for billions of people all over the world. We can and should do something about it while we still have time.

I say that as someone who has been hearing about these environmental for most of his life. When I was a kid, I grew up watching cartoons that often threw in a few pro-environment messages. There were even shows that presented global warming as a serious issue and I’m not just talking about “Captain Planet.”

As a kid, I didn’t understand much of the science. Even most of the adults I talked to didn’t understand it. Some showed concern, but most weren’t inclined to give it much credence. Some even thought it was all just environmentalist propaganda.

It didn’t help that many of them lived in parts of the country where the weather didn’t change considerably from season to season. Many lived in the southern United States where they rarely got snow or cold temperatures of any kind. If the Earth was getting warmer, they weren’t going to notice.

The same could be said for the family I had living in the north. Some lived in areas that got a lot of snow. Talk to them about global warming and they’d be more likely to welcome it, often joking about how they wouldn’t mind shoveling less snow every winter.

Again, both these perspectives miss the forest from the trees. Climate, by definition, doesn’t focus on weather from day to day or even year to year. It tracks temperatures and conditions over a long span of time. For people who don’t pay attention or live in areas with relatively bland weather, it can be hard to sense.

For where I live, however, that’s not the case. I live in the Mid-Atlantic area of the United States. It’s an area that sees a wide range of conditions between winter and summer. I’ve lived through summers where it has been over 100 degrees for weeks on end. I’ve also lived through winters that have had multiple blizzards. I’ve experienced both extremes.

As a result, I take notice when those extreme change considerably. It doesn’t happen all at once. Sometimes, it’s subtle to the point where you don’t realize it until years later. Now, given my age and how long I’ve been living in this area, I can safely say that I have felt the affects of climate change.

It has only become obvious to me over the past few years. In that time, I’ve really taken note of how mild every winter has been lately. It used to be things got pretty brisk in mid-October. In the weeks before Halloween, I had to stop wearing shorts and keep a sweatshirt handy. For the past couple years, it only seems to get chilly for a couple of days. Then, it’s up over 70 degrees again.

The winter months have been even more noticeable. When I was a kid, it rarely snowed in December, outside a few rare occasions. However, it was still usually cold, so much so that I had to wear a heavy coat for most days. These days, it has rarely gotten overly cold. I can go almost the entire month of December without having to wear more than a sweatshirt.

It’s still January and February that have been the most noticeable. For so many years, right up until 2015, I could usually count on at least two significant snowstorms. They were rarely full-blown blizzards, but it was still common to see some snow on the ground for the majority of the month.

That has changed considerably in recent years. In my area, there hasn’t been a significant snowstorm in over five years. The most we’ve gotten is, at most, four inches in a single storm. It usually turns to rain and melts within a day.

It’s a hell of a contrast to the winters I remember. Add that to summers that feel hotter and more humid for longer stretches of time and there’s no getting around it.

Climate change is real.

I’ve felt it. I’ve witnessed it. I’m seeing it happen within my lifetime.

I understand that climate involves weather patterns over a long period of time, often exceeding that of a typical human lifetime. However, even if it is anecdotal, I’ve still felt it. That’s deeply concerning to me. Even if it means I don’t have to shovel snow quite as often, it’s still cause for concern.

If the climate is changing that much in this span of time, then I think that’s going to be a bigger problem as time goes on. Moreover, it’s a problem we shouldn’t ignore or underscore. Regardless of your politics, you’re going to be affected by the weather, whether you like it or not.

Much of our civilization depends on weather patterns that are stable and consistent. Climate change will disrupt that stability. We might be able to adapt to some extent, but not if it happens all at once. In that instance, it could lead to a lot of upheaval and suffering. At that point, it’ll be too late.

Now, I’m not qualified to know what the best solutions are. I know they do exist and we need to invest in them because if we don’t, it could end up costing us much more in the future and not just in terms of money.

Regardless of how you feel about modern science, at least consider this personal testimony. Climate change is real. It’s happening. It could potentially lead to some serious problems down the line. Now is not the time to whine about the shortcomings of science. We all live on this planet together. Let’s do what we can to keep it comfortable.

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Filed under Current Events, Environment, history, politics, real stories

To My Future Wife: Some Quick Notes

Sunset Couple Romance - Free image on Pixabay

I’m a big fan of romance. I hope all the sexy short stories and erotica romance novels I’ve written have made that abundantly. However, I don’t just enjoy writing about it. At some point, I do want to experience a real-life romance with that special someone one day.

I know true love is real and it is powerful. I’ve seen my siblings meet the person they would go onto marry. I’ve seen it with my parents, my friends, and other real people who have shared their stories.

There’s love worth seeking and cherishing. That, I’m sure of. It hasn’t happened for me just yet. In fact, among my siblings, I’m the only one who is still single. I haven’t been in a serious relationship for quite some time and a global pandemic has not helped in that respect.

However, I still hold out hope that I will one day meet that special woman. I don’t know when it’ll happen. Everyone I know says I’ll it when I meet her. I’m inclined to take their word for it. When that time comes, I look forward to the day when we can get married, build a life, and grow old together.

I don’t pretend to know who that special woman is, what she’ll look like, and when I’ll meet her. For all I know, she may never read this. I’m not going to assume she will. Even so, I want to take an opportunity to send my future wife a message. Whether or not she heeds it is entirely up to her.

What follows are some notes to this special someone with whom I hope to share my life with. Some are tips. Some are bits of advice. Some are just hard facts that we’ll both have to work around. I’m sure she’ll have a list of her own, but I won’t know it until I meet her. In the meantime, here’s my list for my future wife, wherever she may be.

I have terrible bed hair and sometimes go the entire day without fixing it. Yes, I know it looks goofy. It just doesn’t bother me.

If I can put hot sauce on something, I probably will. That’s not an insult to your cooking or mine. I just love hot sauce.

Wednesday is New Comic Book Day. I always get up early for New Comic Book Day, sometimes as early as 4:30 a.m. I’ll do my best not to wake you, but I apologize in advance if I do.

I sleep naked. I enjoy sleeping naked. It’s not a sexual thing. I just enjoy how it feels. You have been warned.

I can’t dance worth a damn, even with the aid of alcohol and music I love. If I embarrass you, I apologize in advance. If you think my terrible dancing is cute, I’ll gladly do it as often as I can.

I’m at my most relaxed with my morning coffee and my bath robe. That’s just useful to know.

I’m very good at sticking to a regiment. If I ever deviate unexpectedly, assume there’s a good reason. If I don’t tell you that reason, you can assume something is wrong. Don’t be afraid to pry because it sometimes takes a while for me to put it into words.

I will get emotional during certain TV shows and movies. I’ll try to hide it, but I won’t try very hard.

During football season, I build my entire Sundays around watching football. Unless something serious comes up, don’t expect me to change it.

I’m a hugger, by nature. If I hug you unexpected, don’t assume there’s an agenda behind it. I just enjoy a nice hug.

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Filed under Jack Fisher's Insights, romance

Jack Fisher’s Sexy Sunday Thoughts: Tender Loving Edition

There’s a time and a place for the rough, raunchy, and crude brand of loving. Whether it’s a sloppy kiss or full-on sex, it has its place in our romantic pallet. It even has its place in the world of romance, including the sexy kind I like to write. It’s raw, but blunt. It gets the point across and there are situations where that works beautifully.

Then, there are the moments that require a tender touch. There’s certainly a time and place for this too, but I feel like it isn’t celebrated quite as much. Some of that is just because it comes off as cliché and corny. I understand that to some extent, but I think that corniness is too shallow a criticism. It also obscures how powerful your lover’s tender touch can be.

Whether it’s a simple romantic moment or a night of passion, the tender kind of loving can be powerful. It adds depths to the intimacy. It compounds the passion of a moment. Even if you think it’s corny, it’s hard to overlook how impactful it can be, especially when you’re lonely, vulnerable, or depressed.

It can be subtle or elaborate, but it’s the sentiment behind those tender gestures that make it so powerful. When you share that kind of tenderness with someone, holding and caressing them with the utmost care, it shows how much you mean to them. It also shows that you’re willing to be gentle, as well as honest with them.

After the past couple years, I hope our collective appreciation of such tender gestures has only grown. As the weather gets colder, I encourage everyone to share some of that tenderness with your lover every chance you get. To et you in the mood, here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts. Enjoy!


“Monogamy requires a lot of effort, but polygamy requires a lot more energy.”

How To Date Multiple Women At Once

“If you’re not big on hugs, then chances are you won’t be a great stripper.”

Ex-stripper inherits $223,000 from former customer with whom she'd had an  'everlasting friendship' | The Independent | The Independent

“A bachelor party without strippers is like Christmas without presents.”

Bachelor Party Bus | Rent My Party Bus

“Practically speaking, a dating app that caters to sex addicts is not likely to result in lasting relationships.”

Sex Addiction: Why Sex Is A Problem For These 8 Celebrities | HuffPost null

“Sex is the primary reason why we’ve made so many advances in lube.”

How To Use Lube & Have Clean Sex Without Making A Mess

“A drug that makes you less horny can only be so addictive.”

Sexy couple laying on bed stock photo

“You can’t say you’re in love with someone if you’re willing to share your bed, but not help pay their bills.”

Couple In Bed - Stock Photos | Motion Array

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Jack Fisher’s Sexy Sunday Thoughts: Thanksgiving 2021 Edition

By now, I hope everyone has had a wonderful and filling Thanksgiving. If your family is anything like mine, you might still be digesting everything you’ve eaten over the past several days. The deserts alone have really stuck with me, but for all the right reasons. Even if your family prefers to keep things low-key, it’s still a festive feast full of food, family, and football.

Whatever you’ve done to celebrate the holiday, I hope it was both enjoyable and delicious. This year was extra rewarding, mostly because my family could enjoy a more traditional Thanksgiving. By that, I mean we could celebrate without having to plan everything around an ongoing pandemic. Granted, the pandemic still affected things, but not nearly as much as last year.

That only made the turkey, stuffing, potatoes, and pies taste even better. It also made spending time with the people I love even more rewarding. Knowing we’ve navigated this mess for nearly two years just shows how far we’ve come. It also gave us a chance to just step back, set aside all the crap going on in the world, and enjoy a delicious meal together.

For that, I am truly thankful.

One of these years, though, I hope I can find that special someone that I can invite to these Thanksgiving feasts. I would love to share the joys of my family’s festive gatherings. Plus, having that special someone also gives us a sexy way of burning off all the calories. That didn’t happen this year. Maybe next year will be different.

Once again, I hope everyone had a safe and happy Thanksgiving. Now is as good a time as any to burn off those excess calories in the sexiest way possible. Here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to get you going. Enjoy!


“Being lazy and wanting a three-way is like being stupid and wanting a PHD.”

Why threesomes are such a common sexual fantasy. –

“Someone with a firm handshake probably gives great hand-jobs.”

Handshake man - women | Man and women shaking hands When usi… | Flickr

“Statistically speaking, there’s a good chance you’ve been kissed on the cheek by someone who gave a blowjob within the last 24 hours.”

274 Lipstick Kiss Cheek Stock Photos, Pictures & Royalty-Free Images -  iStock

“We’ll never know how many times we almost caught our parents having sex.”

Excuses Parents Gave Kids Who Walked In During Sex | POPSUGAR Family

“When you think about it, wet dreams could mean you’re either watching too much porn or not enough.”

Can Girls Have Wet Dreams? They Sure Can — Here's How

“If you have low self-esteem, then dating a dominatrix is a bad idea.”

4 Things I Learned From Dating A Dominatrix | YourTango

“To some extent, orgasms were our first true rating system.”

This is how many couples actually achieve 'shared orgasms' - and how you  can do it - Mirror Online

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Jack Fisher’s Sexy Sunday Thoughts: Kissing With Tongue Edition

Intimacy comes in many forms. Showing love, affection, and passion can involve a great many gestures. It varies from person to person and couple to couple. It depends heavily on your culture, your personality, and even your kinks. Some are genuinely unique in how they share their love with others, even in non-sexual situations.

Then, there are certain gestures that convey a special kind of intimacy. They don’t always cross cultures or customs, but they get the point across. That’s how I feel about kissing that involves lots of tongue.

It may just be a personal preference of mine, but I really enjoy kissing with a lot of tongue. When I was dating my ex-girlfriend, that was something we both enjoyed immensely. It helped that she was very playful when it came to kissing. She was not the one to just give you a peck on the cheek. She really put some extra energy into it.

I know that’s not for everyone, but whenever a little tongue entered the equation, it really made things special. I really came to appreciate it. I still do, even after we broke up. Whenever I see another couple kissing, I think their willingness to use some extra tongue says a lot about the passion they share.

Again, everyone has their own way of sharing intimacy. For me, a little tongue with every kiss goes a long way. If you’re not convinced, try I with your lover. To help, here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to get all the right passions flowing. Enjoy!


“Practically speaking, men who do chores should have more sex appeal by default.”

Men Who Do Household Chores Are More Sexually Attractive To Women

“A good lover sometimes means not hesitating to stick your fingers into very specific places.”

Close up Shot of Happy Stock Footage Video (100% Royalty-free) 1011261170 |  Shutterstock

“If you’re not a people person, then an orgy is probably not for you.”

Shy Around Women? Here's How to Fix it | The Modern Man

“Women with big tits will always get away with more than men with big dicks.”

Woman's Life Saved By Her Breast Implants After She Was Shot In The Chest -  GoodTimes: Lifestyle, Food, Travel, Fashion, Weddings, Bollywood, Tech,  Videos & Photos

“Some kids inherently know that they were the byproduct of a quickie.”

A Fast Guide to Quickie Positions and Locations

“Using dating apps while you’re horny is like going to a buffet when you’re hungry.”

Cove Dating App Launches in Phoenix - Fabulous Arizona

“We should all appreciate and honor those who had to test ineffective condoms.”

Japan condom-makers fear anticlimax at Olympics | The Japan Times

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My Christmas Tree Is Up And My Christmas Shopping Is (Mostly) Done!

See the source image

The holidays are fast approaching. Chances are you’ve already heard Christmas music on the radio. You probably started Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas” the day after Halloween. Some people whine about it, claiming Christmas festivities are popping up way too early. They’ll even go so far as to say it undermines the season.

I say to hell with those people. I love it! I love that Christmas decorations start going up as soon as the calendar turns to November. I’ve always loved the festivities and aesthetics of Christmas. Talk to anyone in my family. They’ll tell you the same thing. I love Christmas and I always go the extra mile to make it more awesome.

As such, it should surprise absolutely nobody that I already have my Christmas tree up and decorated. Actually, I’ve had it up for a couple weeks now. I put it up the day after Halloween. I’m sure there’s a healthy debate to be had about when the appropriate time is to put up your Christmas decorations. I would not do well in that debate. I’d get a bit too passionate about my right to put up a Christmas tree on Halloween.

So, rather than debate the merits of having your tree up this early, I thought I’d just take a moment to acknowledge that I take Christmas more seriously than most. I’m the kind of guy who will always want to have his tree up the day after Halloween. If I ever meet that special someone, I’d want them to be part of that tradition, as well.

In addition, I’d also like to acknowledge that this year presents some unique challenges for the holidays. I know that’s a relative statement, given how crazy last year was. Even I had to adapt. I still had all my decorations up early, but my family had to modify their usual holiday activities to work around the pandemic. We still made the most of it. This year, we hope to have some more traditional festivities.

There will still be challenges. There are currently some ongoing issues with respect to supply chains and retail. That’s why I encouraged everyone to do their holiday shopping ASAP. I’ll even belabor that for good measure.

Do your shopping early.

Get your Christmas lists completed now.

You’ll save your Christmas spirit plenty of strain in the long run.

To that end, I’d also like to state that I’m not just blowing smoke. I really practice what I preach here. As of a few days ago, I’ve pretty much completed all my Christmas shopping. Now, I say “pretty much” because I don’t shop for Christmas presents like a normal person. Like I said, I go overboard and I’m proud of it.

My standard practice is that I make a list of all my family members. I then ask them if there’s something specific they want me to get them. Most don’t respond, but those that do get priority. For those that don’t, I try to guess as best I can to get them something they would like. I try to make it personal and sentimental. Some of the gifts I bought years ago still get used today. Those are the gifts I love giving.

However, I rarely stop at one gift. I’ve often been inclined to buy two for each person, often as a hedge in case something I get them doesn’t land. It’s the on time of year when I’m not that frugal with my money. I really make an effort to go the extra mile for the people I love.

Part of that is always being on the lookout for more and better gifts. Even when I’ve got my shopping done, I’ll occasionally go to a mall and just browse. If I ever see something that would just be too perfect, I get it. Every year, it seems, I find something unexpected that makes for a great gift.

So, even though my shopping is done on paper, I’m still on the lookout for other awesome gifts. I don’t know if I’ll come across any. I certainly hope I do. It’s been a rough year and the holidays are the best possible time to make it better. Even if you’re not a big Christmas person like I am, I encourage you to make the effort.

It’s not too late. If anything, the time is perfect to make the holidays this year even more festive.

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Jack Fisher’s Sexy Sunday Thoughts: Mile High Club Edition

I’m not a big traveler. I never have been too fond of long road trips or drives in general. I did used to enjoy flying, but that process has only gotten less and less convenient over the years for reasons I’m sure most already appreciate. That sentiment only got worse when the COVID-19 pandemic hit.

That said, I do enjoy my regular vacations. I also enjoy getting away for a while, going somewhere far from home and just taking in new experiences. I’ve found that, as I’ve gotten older, I’ve only come to appreciate that even more.

However, there’s one aspect of travel that definitely has an overtly sexual connotation. That would be the so-called “Mile High Club.” For those who have been too sheltered or have just forgotten too much during lockdowns, the mile high club is shorthand for those who have had sex on a plane.

It’s not just a generic porno scenario. This club exists. People really do try to join it. I know people who have. Granted, not every experience is sexy or memorable. I even have one friend who tried and failed with his girlfriend at the time, but it was a disaster.

Like anything involving sex and intimacy, there’s a right and wrong way to do it. I get the sense most don’t know that way or just never get the opportunity. I don’t know if I ever will, but if I ever do meet the love of my life, I’m certainly going to raise the issue. Hopefully, she has an adventurous spirit.

Now that more people are traveling, I suspect the mile high club will be making a comeback over the next few months. If you’re going to try to join it, please be safe and be careful. At the same time, don’t be afraid to be a little bold. To that end, here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to inspire those who seek to join this rare and sexy club. Enjoy!


“The race to achieve orgasm is the only race where a tie is ideal.”

This is how many couples actually achieve 'shared orgasms' - and how you  can do it - Mirror Online

“Being strict parent always runs the risk of raising a future dominatrix.”

I Am an International Dominatrix'

“In general, you’re living dangerously by hooking up with someone who has anger issues and loves rough sex.”

Men's Corner: Why Angry Sex Is Better Than Making Love

“The faces we make during orgasm are as close as we’ll ever get to being real-life emojis.”

Orgasm machine to deliver climax at the push of a button | The Independent  | The Independent

“If hypnotism actually worked, then magicians and therapists would get laid more than rock stars.”

Criss Angel wants to transform our reviews of his shows - The Morning Call

“If you’re serious about your health, then wouldn’t it make sense to find doctors sexy?”

Hot guys: Doctor's advice: protect yourself

“Like it or not, some of us exist because of premature ejaculation.”

How to not be awkward in bed during sex - Her World Singapore

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Jack Fisher’s Sexy Sunday Thoughts: Relaxing Morning Rain Edition

It’s been an eventful couple of weeks. Between Halloween and Election Day, I wouldn’t blame anyone if they just wanted to use this weekend to relax and unwind. We all need that. With the holidays right around the corner, the best weekend plans at this point involve no plans.

That was my approach this weekend. It also helped that it has been a somewhat rainy weekend where I live. In the middle of summer, that usually bothers me. This time of year, though, I genuinely enjoy it. I find it so soothing, especially in the morning. If I wake up on a crisp Saturday morning and I hear rain outside, I know I’m going to have a good day.

Other than the sun not glaring through my windows, that relaxing sound of morning rain helps me sleep in when I want to. I also find it so soothing, especially when I’ve had a long, exhausting week. I even think there’s something sexy about it.

If you’re lucky enough to have a lover, I think you know what I’m getting at. On a cool, rainy morning, you have more excuses than usual to snuggle up to that special someone and get a little frisky. Even if it’s just for warmth, there’s an intimacy to it. I haven’t felt it in quite some time, but I encourage everyone lucky enough to have that special someone to embrace it.

We’re getting to that time of year where the days are shorter, the weather is more chaotic, and we have more reasons than usual to sleep in on the weekends. If it happens to be raining on a particular morning, I encourage everyone to appreciate both its potential for relaxation, as well as its sex appeal.

In case you need more than just encouragement, here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to sweeten the deal. Enjoy!


“You can tell a lot about the maturity of a person by how they pronounce the planet Uranus.”

Arguments You're Having That Actually Prove Your Relationship Is in a Great  Place | Martha Stewart

“We’ll never truly know, or be comfortable with, how many opportunities were the result of giving blowjobs.”

Funny Young Woman Eating Banana. by KinoMaster on Envato Elements

“To some extent, aren’t family reunions a celebration of successful orgasms?”

How To Put On A Fantastic Family Reunion | Marquee Monkeys

“A gold digger is just a prostitute who plays the long game.”

A Foolproof Way to Protect Yourself From Gold-Diggers | Kennon Financial

“The next time you think you’re weird, remember there are people out there who willingly use nipple clamps.”

Buy Black Clover Clamps Nipple Clamps from MEO | Nipple Clamps

“A kink is rarely as strange as how someone discovered they liked it.”

From “Pure Angel” to “Your Personal Pornstar”: 5 Steps to Unleash ANY Woman's  Kinky Side In Bed… - Mimicnews

“A man who loves giving oral sex, but does not groom his facial hair, is going to encounter problems.”

7 Proven Ways to Grow Thicker Beard (Guaranteed Results)

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Thought Experiment: What Is The Limit Of Human Competence?

The following is a video from my YouTube channel, Jack’s World. It’s a new entry into my ongoing Thought Experiments playlist and it explores the limits of human competence over capability. I hope it sparks larger thoughts and more discussions. Enjoy!

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Filed under Jack's World, philosophy, prostitution, Thought Experiment, YouTube

How I Dealt With A Bully (And Why I Don’t Recommend It)

Should You Confront Your Old Bully?

Bullies suck. I think most of us can agree on that. Those who don’t probably haven’t been on the receiving end of a bully at some point in their lives. They’re the lucky ones. Most of us can’t rely on that kind of luck.

Now, before I go any further, I want to make clear that this isn’t some generic anti-bullying PSA. There are already way too many of those and even if their intentions are good, they don’t always send the right message.

That has been my experience with these campaigns. They claim to understand the dynamics of bullying. They offer a list of responses and recourses, some of which are more helpful than others. Some are downright counterproductive. They all miss one key detail.

Every bullying situation is different.

Every bully is different.

Every target of a bully is different.

The dynamics behind every instance of bullying is different.

In short, not every case of bullying plays out the same way and there’s no one proper way to deal with it. Not every bully is Biff Tannen and not every victim is George McFly. One well-placed punch isn’t going to completely rectify a situation. Just ignoring it won’t rectify it, either.

With that in mind, I’d like to share another personal story about how I dealt with a bully. It’s not nearly as dramatic as you might see in the movies, but it worked out in my favor for the most part. In fact, to say it worked out might be a bit of a stretch. You’ll understand why when you hear the details.

This incident played out when I was in the 9th grade. It was not a good time for me. I was depressed, socially awkward, and had pretty much no self-esteem. I also had a bad attitude that made me fairly unpopular and an easy target. In hindsight, I think it was only a matter of time before a bully found me.

For the sake of this story, let’s call this kid Don. He was no Biff Tannen, but he was a real asshole. This kid was my age, but he was behind the curve when it came to maturity. He and a bunch of like-minded friends liked to goof off, screw with people, and do their own thing. They weren’t exactly caricatures from 80s teen movies, but they were close.

As it just so happened, Don rode the same bus as I did. In fact, he got off at the same stop that I did. He lived less than two blocks from me. Due to that proximity, he took an interest in me. He started teasing me and asking dumb, embarrassing questions. Sometimes he did it on the bus. Sometimes he did it in the middle of a class. Whenever he did it, I hated it.

Me being the immature, self-loathing kid that I was, I didn’t deal with it very well. I often tried to tell him off. I cussed him out. That only seemed to encourage him. I never tried to fight him, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t tempted.

It also helped, somewhat, that I wasn’t in good shape and would probably lose that fight. Don was no athlete, but he was bigger than me and willing to do dumb shit to win. I had no advantages, whatsoever.

I still wanted it to stop. I had enough problems in my life. I didn’t need to deal with Don and his antics. I wasn’t sure how I was going to deal with it. I got some advice from the adults in my life. They often told me to just ignore him and avoid him. If he ever laid a hand on me, then I should go to a school administrator. I didn’t want it to get to that point.

Unfortunately, ignoring Don didn’t make him stop. If anything, it encouraged him to keep doing it. He didn’t get bored. He just saw someone he could tease and get away with. That wasn’t something the anti-bullying PSAs told me.

At some point, I had to respond. Yelling at him wasn’t working. Trying to politely ask him to stop wasn’t working. This was an immature knuckle-head who wasn’t going to be reasoned with. If I was going to respond, it had to be very blunt and very effective.

It finally came to ahead one day on the bus. We were waiting to leave to go home for the day. Like he had before, Don decided to move up to my seat and start harassing me. I don’t remember what he said. I just remember he wouldn’t go away. He kept asking me these dumb question and teasing me when I didn’t respond.

He just would not stop and he would not leave. I was tempted to punch him in the face, but I knew that probably wouldn’t pan out. If I threw the first punch, then I would be blamed for everything. I may have been young, but I knew how school politics work.

Finally, I decided to respond.

I didn’t punch him.

I didn’t break something he had on him.

Instead, I just looked at him with as much hate as I could muster and I spit right in his eye.

At that moment, Don’s goofy and immature demeanor disappeared in an instant. He turned away to rub his eye. I wasn’t sure if he was crying or anything. At the time, I honestly didn’t care. I didn’t move from where I sat. I just remained where I sat, waiting for a response.

Eventually, I got it. He tried to spit at me too. He missed, only hitting my ear. After that, he left and went to the back of the bus with his friends.

That was it.

That was the end of it. Don never talked to me ever again.

Now, I do not recommend anyone do that with a bully. Spitting in someone’s eye isn’t as bad as a punch, but it still counts as assault. Had Don gone to a school administrator, he could’ve gotten me into a lot of trouble. However, he didn’t and I think I know why. He would’ve had to explain why the situation got so heated and since he instigated it, he would’ve gotten in trouble too.

Even so, I’m not proud of what I did. I didn’t feel better about myself. I doubt Don felt better, either. Had there been more witnesses or had someone reported us, it could’ve gotten much worse. At the same time, I could’ve handled that much better, even for a moody teenager.

Again, do not take this as advice for dealing with a bully. There’s a good chance it will not work out as well as it did for me. I got lucky in this case. Don’t expect to get that lucky when dealing with a bully.

Also, Don, if you’re reading this, I apologize for spitting in your eye. However, you were still a huge asshole.

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