Tag Archives: Jack Fisher

There’s a good chance you’ve been in a room with a couple who was secretly getting frisky. Maybe they were doing it under a blanket. Maybe they claimed they just needed to refill their drinks. Whatever their excuse, you probably didn’t think much of it. By the time they were done, you were none the wiser.

In fact, I think it’s a near certainty that anyone reading this has either gotten frisky with someone in secret or not noticed when another couple has. I know this because my ex-girlfriend and I were fond of sneaking a few sexy gestures to one another when no one was looking. I won’t get into specifics. I’ll just say we were very tactful.

To my parents, who might end up reading this, I apologize. I promise it was nothing too crazy. At the same time, I don’t deny it was kind of thrilling.

I’ve known plenty of other couples who do the same. I had a roommate in college who loved getting frisky with his girlfriend when he thought I wasn’t looking. Honestly, I kind of admired his bravado. We were living in a dorm. There’s not a lot of room to hide in a place like that. Sometimes, you and your lover are just too energetic, so to speak.

As a lover of all things sexy and romantic, I totally respect that. So long as a couple doesn’t do anything too overt, I’ll gladly cheer them on. Being subtle with your sexiness takes tact and skill. Those are skills we should all refine with our lovers. It makes our love lives, and life in general, more exciting.

In that spirit, here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to inspire all those who like to be sneaky with their sexiness. I hope you never get caught or find yourself in too awkward a moment. Enjoy!

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“Your capacity for disgust is directly proportional to your willingness to touch a used condom.”

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“Expecting a satisfying sex life from an unmotivated lover is like wanting a virgin prostitute.”

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“Women who have given birth should have fewer reservations about anal sex, by default.”

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“If identical twins jerk each other off, does that still count as masturbation?”

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“You can either be jealous of someone who has multiple orgasms or you can be inspired, but only one will make you happier.”

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“Can you really say something is your favorite food until you’ve licked it off your lover’s body?”

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“Imagine how stressful strip poker is for someone who has both a gambling problem and a porn addiction.”

It’s official now because of the calendar. Depending on where you live, you can probably feel it too. The leaves on the trees are starting to change. The weather is getting cooler. Anything and everything is being flavored with pumpkin or pumpkin spice. Football is back in swing. Fall 2021 has arrived.

After last year, it’s a lot less bittersweet. Despite the best efforts of idiots and anti-vaxxers, we are in a better place this year. This year, we might actually be able to enjoy traditional fall activities. It still won’t be completely normal. I think we’re still a long way from that. That shouldn’t stop us from enjoying it as best we can.

As fun and sexy a hot summer can be, fall can bring a different kind of sex appeal. That cooler, crisper air makes the morning coffee taste a bit better. That same weather also makes curling up under a blanket and snuggling a little closer all the more appealing. Plus, it’s not overly cold so you can still get away with wearing minimal clothing.

For me, personally, the sexiest fall activity I can imagine involves snuggling up on the couch with a beautiful woman, watching football, and enjoying a nice fall themed beer. I may not have met the woman I can share that with yet, but it’s something I hope to do at some point this fall, if I get the chance.

If you’re lucky enough to have a special someone, use Fall 2021 as an opportunity to make up for last year. There will be more to do and better days will come. Today is as good a day as any to start. Here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to get you going. Enjoy!

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“A woman who hides her sex toys has no right to judge a man who hides his porn stash.”

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“The fact that crazy women are better in bed is proof that evolution has a kinky side.”

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“If you can text during sex, then you have no excuse when your lover can’t find your G-spot.”

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“Making someone horny by mistake is the only time clumsiness will get you laid.”

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“Can you really say you love someone if you’re not willing to lick food off their naked body?”

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“Men will always be suspicious of a woman who owns more than one dildo.”

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“We should all have sympathy for the maids who have to clean the honeymoon suits at resorts.”

Some people are shamelessly shallow. They don’t try to hide it. They don’t care when they get scolded or criticized for it. To them, style will always supersede substance. That’s how they conduct themselves and that’s how they go about attracting others, be it romantically or professionally.

Most of us probably know someone like that. They can be annoying at times, but we can at least appreciate when they’re transparent about it. That kind of honesty can be refreshing.

One of the shallowest ways people show off is with flashy cars. However, I’m not just talking about the kinds of fancy cars that rich people buy to show off. There are people who put time, energy, money, and resources into turning an ordinary car into this massive statement about who they are and who they’re hoping to attract.

Now, I’ve never been a car guy. I don’t entirely get the appeal of elaborately decorating or modifying a car. However, I totally respect the people who turn their cars into a work of art. I also understand how that can have a certain sex appeal.

Cars are big, loud, powerful machines. They convey something about us, whether we intend it or not. For those who use flashy cars, be they supped up hot rods or tripped out luxury vehicles, to attract certain people, it can be effective. It’s even logical in some respects. If they can handle a fancy car, then they should be able to handle a lover.

Again, I’m not a car guy. I don’t claim to know the intricacies of what makes a car flashy. I just know it takes skill and passion, which I can always respect. In celebration of those passions, here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to the flashy car lovers and the people who are drawn to them. Enjoy!

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“To some extent, foreplay is a teaser trailer for your genitals.”

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“Good lovers learn from their mistakes, but that’s extra challenging when you’re with a masochist.”

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“Being charming is like having a boob job on your personality.”

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“Innuendo is just a subtle way of letting everyone around you know how horny you are.”

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“Beauty may be in the eye of the beholder, but sex appeal is heavily influenced by our genitals.”

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“Making someone horny by accident is the only accident we don’t mind cleaning up.”

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“Laughing during sex can either be really good or really embarrassing.”

It’s finally here! For sports fans and lifelong football fans like myself, today is one of the holiest of holy days. It’s the day for which we clear our calendar, complete every chore, and purge ourselves of all distraction. That’s because today is the first Sunday of the NFL season. Just typing that put a big smile on my face.

I’m not gonna lie. I am as giddy as a schoolgirl on crack in a pony factory.

I’ve made no secret of my love of football. I’ve also shared how I go about enjoying football every Sunday. From noon until midnight, I basically camp out in front of my TV, armed with a six pack of beer and a large pizza. Then, thanks to NFL Redzone, I basically spend the whole day consuming every game and moment.

I cannot overstate the amount of joy this brings me every Sunday. It may not be the sexiest way to spend a Sunday. Then again, that could change one day when I meet my future wife. I sincerely hope she loves football as much as I do. If I can find a woman to spend all Sunday watching football with, then I’ll know I’ve found the love of my life.

For now, I’m more than happy to enjoy and indulge in my love of football for this Sunday and for the next 18 Sundays until the Super Bowl. To all my fellow football fans, the wait is over. We are ready for some football! Not that we need any more excitement, but here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to celebrate this most glorious of Sunday. Enjoy!

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“Lying and cheating will never stop, so long as it allows assholes to get laid.”

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“Confusing love and lust is often what differentiates a romance story with a porno.”

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“Role playing is karaoke for your genitals.”

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“No matter how liberal you are, you’ll never be as egalitarian as a bisexual.”

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“You can’t be happy with a boring love life for the same reason you can’t be satisfied with a subtle orgasm.”

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“Can you ever truly be honest with your lover without sharing your porn stash?”

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“There’s a non-zero chance you’ve touched something that has been in someone else’s ass at some point in your life without realizing it.”

Tomorrow is Labor Day. For most of us, it’s just another government holiday that gives us a day off. That’s all well and good. We should always embrace extra days off work. Many of us are already overworked, whether we have full-time jobs or go to school. Even if you love your work, it’s good for our bodies and minds to step back and relax every now and then.

This year, however, I think Labor Day should carry an even deeper meaning. I know last year was crazy in how the COVID-19 pandemic affected our jobs, our lives, and everything in between. However, nobody was hit harder than health care workers.

As someone who has close relatives that are also front-line health care workers, I can attest to the accumulated strain that their job has endured the past two years. It’s hard to overstate just how difficult their jobs have been during this pandemic. It’s also hard to overstate just how much harder they’ve had to work in order to save as many lives as they can.

If ever you needed an example of what it means to work hard against impossible forces, look no further than the nurses, doctors, and paramedics still doing their job. More recently, many have worked themselves to a breaking point. Those same overworked people probably aren’t going to get tomorrow off.

For that reason, and so many others, keep them in your thoughts today and tomorrow as we celebrate Labor Day. There’s no way to know how many lives these people have saved because of their ability and willingness to work hard. They are the real heroes of the past two years and they deserve more than just a single day off.

In honor of those hard workers who have helped us endure this pandemic, I offer these Sexy Sunday Thoughts in celebration. It’s not much, but I hope it gives everyone a new appreciation for Labor Day. Enjoy!

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“Dumb people exist because two other dumb people made dumb, impulsive decisions.”

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“Having a subscription to a nudie magazine is like having a land line.”

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“Pragmatically speaking, gay couples have fewer excuses for an orgasm gap.”

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“Is it physically possible to properly program a sex robot while you’re not horny?”

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“It’s probably not a coincidence that those with mental health issues often have unsatisfying sex lives.”

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“Like it or not, your parents are probably kinkier than you think.”

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“Can you ever trust a pervert with access to a hidden camera?”

There are many ways to be sexy. Not all of them work for every couple or individual. If there’s one thing I’ve learned by writing sexy short stories and sexy novels, it’s that everyone finds sex appeal in different things. We all have our own tastes and proclivities. As long as we explore and express them in a healthy way, it can be a beautiful thing.

Then, there are certain acts that come pretty damn close to having universal sex appeal. It spans time periods, nations, trends, cultures, and porno genres. For reasons we don’t always understand, they just do something for us in a way that gets the blood flowing in all the right directions.

I believe that sexy whispering is among those few acts. It’s subtle. It’s not something you usually see out in the open, but it definitely happens and it definitely has an effect. I remember one time when my ex-girlfriend and I were sitting on the couch watching a movie. Then, she leaned in and whispered something very sensual into my ear.

I’d rather not repeat what it was. I’ll just say that my heart skipped a beat and other parts of my body went on high alert. I’ll just leave it at that.

It’s one of those few things a couple can do in public and not get fined, scorned, or arrested. Just lean in, whisper something sexy into their ear, and let their dirty minds do the rest. When done right, it can be very potent. If you know your lover well enough, you know just what to say to get them going. That can have so many uses in so many sexy situations.

If you’re already with someone, you probably already know this. If you’re not, then trust me. This is a good tidbit to keep in mind. If you need some ideas on what to whisper, here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to help out. Enjoy!

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“Being too horny on your honeymoon is like being too hungry at a buffet.”

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“How much can you really trust someone who doesn’t cuss during sex?”

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“Porn gives the impression that a lot of people prefer to keep their shoes on during sex.”

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“Parents of teenage boys will always be reluctant to touch their unwashed socks.”

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“The next time you think your job sucks, remember that there are people tasked with cleaning up after an orgy.”

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“Willingly paying for porn is a true measure of integrity.”

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“Asking for a three-way is a tacit admission that you need backup to get the job done.”

I’m a simple man. I enjoy a cold beer, a ball game, and sweet loving from a caring lover. That’s usually enough to leave me content and happy on any given day. However, there are times when you want to get out there, be social, and maybe connect with someone who could be that caring lover we all seek. If not, you can still enjoy a cold beer.

That’s where bar hopping comes in. It’s one of those games we adults play that really has no losers if you do it right. I wasn’t a big drinker for the first part of my adult life, but as I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to appreciate the simple pleasures of bouncing from bar to bar, sharing drinks and meeting new people. If some of those people happen to be beautiful women, then that’s just a nice bonus.

It’s not something you can do all the time. Personally, I’ve always enjoyed bar hopping on vacations or during the summer when it’s a bit easier to go out. You don’t have to go to every bar on the block. You just have to be willing to get out there, have a few drinks, and dare to make a fool of yourself with others.

It’s a beautiful thing. You won’t always get laid, but every now and then, you might. Even if you don’t, you can still have fun. A few good drinks and some good friends will go a long way towards making everything in your life more awesome. You never know. You may meet the love of your life while bar hopping.

I still hold out hope that I’ll meet that special someone. Maybe I’ll meet her while bar hopping. In that spirit, here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to inspire your next round of bar hopping. Enjoy!

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“As kids, we’ll never know or be comfortable with the number of rooms our parents have had sex in.”

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“Porn has made things very awkward for attractive plumbers, teachers, and pool cleaners.”

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“Kids with active imaginations naturally grow up into adults with elaborate sexual fantasies.”

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“We’ll never truly know how many awkward boners have been successfully hidden.”

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“A quickie during a commercial break is the most practical kind of quickie.”

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“There are few tasks that men have done that haven’t been attempted while getting a blowjob.”

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“Men who have seen more than one porno have no right to judge a woman who owns more than one vibrator.”

Let me make one thing clear. I am not a fashion expert. I’m as qualified to judge fashion as I am to do brain surgery. So, please don’t take what I’m about to say as some sort of informed opinion on fashion. This is just me, a guy who writes sexy short stories and sexy novels, commenting on certain attire that he finds sexy.

While it’s easy to see why lingerie and thong underwear has sex appeal, it’s a bit less obvious to see the appeal of something like spandex. Being a fan of superheroes, who regularly run around in spandex or spandex-like attire, I see it easier than most. However, I think even non-superhero fans can see an underlying sex appeal to spandex.

It’s not just shiny and tight fitting. It’s a unique material in that it can take many forms, with respect to attire. Not all of them are overtly sexual, but those that are definitely stand out. Having gone to many comic book conventions and seen many dedicated cos-players, I can safely confirm the breadth of spandex’s sex appeal.

Now, as a material, it’s not known for being easy to work with. In fact, you’ll need more time, money, and energy to work spandex into something sexy when compared to other forms of attire. However, the results will stand out. This is a kind of sex appeal that’s not easily matched or mirrored. Again, I can say that with confidence, given how many comic conventions I’ve been to.

Whether you go to those conventions or not, I say spandex is one of those things whose sex appeal is worth celebrating. It’s distinct, it’s flexible, and it can take many sexy forms. For everyone who appreciate its appeal, here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to help inspire some sexy ideas. Enjoy!

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“A good negotiator will have a better chance at getting laid by default.”

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“Alimony is basically the overdraft fee that comes along with heartbreak.”

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“On some levels, isn’t an orgy just a conspiracy to get more orgasms?”

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“You cannot champion the golden rule and refuse to give oral sex without being a hypocrite.”

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“Few have the ability to organize a three-way and even fewer appreciate the responsibilities of ensuring everyone involved is satisfied.”

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“No teenager will ever admit to their parents how horny they are most of the time.”

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“Expecting good sex without being in shape is like expecting good grades without studying.”