Tag Archives: being in love

November 27, 2018 · 5:44 am

Daily Sexy Musing: Loving The Rough Stuff

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When it comes to celebrating love, romance, and everything in between, there’s a popular perception that it has to manifest in certain ways. We’ve seen it play out in movies, TV shows, and novels, some of which I’ve written. There has to be candles, rose petals, and Barry White music playing in the background. If sexy lingerie is somehow worked in, then that’s just a bonus.

From there, it plays out in a way that’s simple, but powerful. There’s plenty of tender kissing, a dash of loving sentiments whispered over the sound of the music, and the kind of tender caressing that makes every nerve shiver for all the right reasons. It’s sweet and sexy in its own right, but I believe there’s room for other kinds of romantic expression.

Not every couple is going to be content with sweet and soft gestures. Even those who enjoy it regularly will probably be in the mood for something else at some point. That’s where the rougher part of romance comes in. By that, I don’t just mean the kind of elaborate BDSM acts that made E. L. James rich. I’m talking about the kind of raw, physical outburst that puts a little something extra into lovemaking.

These days, it’s somewhat tricky to celebrate rough sex. It’s become taboo to be rough with any intimate partner. The reasons for this are many and I’ve already written multiple articles about the tricky politics surrounding it. For this Daily Sexy Musing, I just want to dig a bit deeper into the unique appeal of the rough stuff that often finds its way into a passionate romance. Enjoy!

It’s our night again. We’ve gotten through our day, clearing ourselves of any and all distractions. Now that the sun has set, our priorities align. I love you and you love me. Now, we turn that love into action.

The stage is set.

The moment has arrived.

The desire wells up inside us.

We come together and let our passions do the talking. It’s simple and direct. I feel your body in my arms, tasting your lips with mine and savoring every sensation. You return every gesture, letting love and lust converge into a singular feeling. I can tell you want me. I want you too. Tonight, we’re going to fulfill those wants. Then, just as the feeling escalates, we realize something.

It’s not enough.

We stop kissing. I look at you and you look at me. My arms tremble and your body shudders. The weight of hard truth sinks in. To hold each other, kiss each other, and make love to one another just won’t suffice. For this night, we crave something more.

I see a glint in your eye and a twitch in your face. In an instant, you transform from an innocent angel to a mischievous demon. Within me, humanity gives way to more primal instincts. The balance of love and lust tips in favor of lust. We don’t fight it. In fact, we embrace it. There’s a time and a place to make tender love. Tonight, is not that night.

I don’t just kiss your lips. I devour them.

I don’t just fondle your body. I smother it.

I don’t just remove your clothes. I rip them off.

There’s nothing gentle about what we do. There’s nothing sweet or soft about it, either. We make our way to the bed, ravaging one another’s bodies with our lips and hands. We collapse top the sheets. Our flesh comes together. We’re neither careful nor slow. We just take the most basic acts of intimacy and unleash our ounce of pent up desire.

Our bodies rock.

The bed rocks.

The world around us rocks.

Grunts replace moans. Crude words replace loving proclamations. We grab and grope, smothering and salivating over the sweet bliss we conjure. This is our love at its most unrefined. Rough yet sincere, we need not channel or temper it. There will be other nights for that. For now, we express our love in the roughest of ways. Whether gentle or raw, our passions remain true.

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November 24, 2018 · 9:12 am

Daily Sexy Musing: Sensual Deserts

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There’s something inherently sensual about the concept of desert, especially during the holidays. It comes after a hardy meal. It’s something you enjoy after you’ve fulfilled your primary need for substance. It’s not the least bit necessary. You could skip desert and still be perfectly content. However, why stop at contentment? Just being content is not the same as being satisfied.

I’ve always had a special fondness for desert. It actually predates my love of erotica/romance. I come from a family of skilled cooks who know how to make the sweetest, most savory deserts you can imagine. They help make every meal extra special. Even when I felt full, I always made an effort to enjoy desert. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to appreciate it in other more intimate ways.

A good desert is lot like making love. Sure, it fills a basic need, but that’s not the only reason we seek it. There’s a deeper, more meaningful aspect to it. Even though we could live without it, those extra sweet experiences are what make it worth living. This Daily Sexy Musing is my way of uniting the common threads that tie desert to making love. I hope it helps everyone work up an appetite, among other things. Enjoy!

I take my last bite. Our meal is complete. We’re both full, our bellies bloated and warm with food. The stress and rigors of the day have long since faded. We have done what we need to do. We have sustained and nourished our bodies, as needed.

However, we are not satisfied.

I see it in your eyes. I make damn sure you can see it in mine. Flushed with energy and nutrients, we no longer need concern ourselves with survival and hunger. After all, a good meal is only as good as what it allows us to do. With full stomachs, we can now pursue another critical need.

I reach across the table and take your hand in mine. Through my touch, I let you know the needs that remain unmet. With energy to spare and calories to burn, we are equipped to vent the full range of our passions. You mention desert, but we seek something sweeter than any treat.

I join you on the other side of the table.

I take you in my arms.

I taste you with my lips.

I stand ready to gorge with you on a different kind of meal.

Our hunger finally catches up with our desire, one need blending with another. Our breath contains the lingering smell of food. It supplements the hunger and the desire it inspires. What we need gives way to what we want. After a good meal, we have what we need to seek it.

We clear the table.

We shed the formal attire that hinders our pursuit.

We tap into the excess energy within our bodies.

Together, our flesh tastes one another. We dine on a new kind of delight, the ultimate desert after the perfect meal. What good food makes possible, great passion makes fulfilling. We don’t stop with a simple appetizer. We don’t hold back, even after the first course. We skip the formalities and get right to the succulent desert that awaits.

I take it in.

I share it with you.

Through our love, we taste pure ecstasy. It is, and always will be, our favorite desert.

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November 21, 2018 · 6:41 am

Why You Should (And Shouldn’t) Marry Your Best Friend

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Love is complicated. You don’t need to be an aspiring erotica/romance writer to understand that. Anyone who has any experience with love, good and bad alike, finds that out very quickly. As someone who writes about and contemplates it more than most men dare admit, I find many of those complications both fascinating and frustrating.

Recently, one particular complication has interested/confounded me. It has to do with who we ultimately decide we want to spend the rest of our lives with. I know marriage is rapidly changing and I’ve highlighted some of its past deficiencies, but I’m focusing primarily on the romance part. I know love hasn’t always been linked to marriage, but love is a feeling that goes beyond any institution.

That’s what makes it so special when we find someone who we love so much that we want to indelibly link our lives with theirs. Whether or not you call it a marriage is beside the point. Seeking a romantic connection that deep isn’t just the premise of a good romance story. It’s a powerful human drive that has guided us since the hunter/gatherer days.

Whether or not we marry that special someone, having that kind of love for someone and wanting to be with them is a romantic constant that transcends institutions. This brings me to a question that I’ve asked more than once over the years and gotten many conflicting answers that all sound legitimate.

Should you marry your best friend?

I’ve asked it to close friends and family members. I’ve asked that question on Reddit. I’ve even asked it on Twitter. No matter where or how I ask it, though, I always get a wide range of answers. Some say your best friend is the only person you should marry. Others say that’s the last person you should marry. Both give reasons that I can’t entirely disagree with.

As an admitted romantic, this really confounds me. Beyond complicating my efforts to write compelling love stories, it highlights the complexity and diversity surrounding love. Even though it’s a feeling most of us experience, people go about it in such wildly different ways. Remarkably, people can make those ways work and experience intensely meaningful romances.

To understand how, I want to share some of the responses I’ve gotten over the years. When I first started asking the question among close friends and relative, most said without hesitation that you should definitely marry your best friend. Your best friend is someone you know, care for, and stand by through thick and thin. Marrying them is just an extension of that depth.

I’ve seen relationships built on this. When one of my close relatives lost his wife after a nearly 50-year marriage, I could hear the strain in his voice when he said he’d just lost his best friend. To him, there was no line dividing the woman he loved and his best friend. The same person he hung out with on a Saturday night is the same person who bore his two children.

It seems definitive, but at the same time, I have another close relative who sees it very differently. To him, a spouse is someone very different from your best friend. A spouse is someone with which you share a unique intimacy that you can’t have with any other friend, no matter how close you are. Trying to mix friends and spouses is like trying to get a plumber to fix your computer.

Whether you agree with that sentiment or not, this same relative has been married to the same woman for over four decades. Their love is every bit as intimate as anyone else’s. I’ve seen them interact differently with each other than they do with their friends. This is how they go about their relationship and it works for them.

On the other side of the spectrum, I’ve seen people who’ve tried to answer this question prove themselves dead wrong. One of my cousins made it clear in seeking a partner that he didn’t want a best friend. He wanted a wife. He wanted someone he could share his life with and later build a family. He eventually did find someone and they had that family.

However, their relationship was never that stable. They ended up getting divorced after less than 10 years and it was one of those divorces that surprised nobody. My cousin and his wife both shared the same goal. They even shared the same approach to finding love. Despite that, they couldn’t make it work.

Something similar happened to a girl I knew in college. She was a romantic like me and she once told me that she would only marry her best friend. I believed her and I may have even encouraged her. Right around my senior year, she claimed she found her best friend and she couldn’t wait to marry him. Like my cousin, though, it didn’t work out. They got divorced.

Their reasons for breaking up aren’t mine to reveal. I’ll only say that if you spent a just few days with them, even at their best, you wouldn’t have been surprised about their relationship failing. They were one of those couples that just never took anything seriously enough. They acted as though just being best friends was enough. Relationships, no matter how good they are, still require work.

I could list dozens more examples that prove or disprove both sides. There are plenty of cases where best friends go onto become strong relationships. There are others in which attempting to turn a best friend into a spouse fails miserably. It’s possible that either approach could lead to a profound love story or an agonizing heartbreak.

To add even more complications to the mix, friendship and romance can be one of those things that just never intersects for some people. While some may disagree with me, I believe it is possible for people of different genders and complementary sexual orientations to be just friends. I’ve had female friends that I could never dream of marrying and I guarantee they would say the same thing about me.

At the end of the day, this is one of those rare questions where there are just as many right answers as there are wrong answers. The people who claim their answer is correct can cite plenty of examples beyond their own experiences that are perfectly valid. They could just as easily argue that the other side is wrong and be objectively right on some levels.

In discussing and contemplating this question for many years, I can’t claim I have more insight than anyone else. I feel like I’ve had experience on many friends, both with friends and with romantic partners. In light of that and all the other responses I’ve gotten from this question, I think the only true answer is best summed up with two simple words.

It depends.

I know that sounds like the kind of answer that only a politician would give, but it’s probably the most comprehensive. Some people just approach love in a way that precludes their best friend entirely. Others go about it in a way that practically requires it. Both can work if you and your lover are on the same page. Both can make for great romance stories with plenty of sex appeal.

It can still be frustrating. It can be downright counter-intuitive at times. It’s for that very reason, though, that love and romance can be so intriguing. If something can confound and compel you at the same time, then you know you’re dealing with something uniquely powerful.

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November 20, 2018 · 5:47 am

Daily Sexy Musing: A Tribute To Quick Flings

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As a romance fan, I’ll always have a strong appreciation for the kind of epic love stories that make for great novels, heart-wrenching movies, and extra-hot sex scenes. I make no apologies for that and I’ll continue incorporating this type of romance into my novels and sexy short stories.

However, even the romantic in me has a soft spot for quick flings. By that, I don’t mean the kinds of one-night stands that are only a few steps above masturbation. For me, a fling is something that has some emotional resonance on top of the sexy stuff. I don’t deny that flings usually emphasize sex more than romance, but I think there’s a place for them in the greater romantic landscape.

I haven’t had too many flings in my life, but I know people who have had more than a few. They don’t treat them as serious relationships, but they don’t treat them as an afterthought in their personal lives. Some even become a stepping stone to finding more meaningful romance. Love them or hate them, quick flings have a significant influence on our collective love lives.

As such, I believe that influence is worth celebrating. The following Daily Sexy Musing will channel both the love and the lust associated with these flings to help flesh out their appeal. Whether or not you’ve ever had one in your life, I hope this helps you appreciate them. Enjoy!

Time is never on our side. In the grand scheme of life, every moment becomes a tiny snapshot as we carry forward. Like following a river, the ripples fade fast and become distant memories. For you and me, I want more. For us, I believe we’re capable of making waves.

A random encounter brought us together.

A fleeting passion brought us intimacy.

A fondness of flesh made it something greater.

What started as a sensual release is no longer shallow. I remember your face. I recall the warm touch of your smooth skin. The way your flesh felt in my hand and the way our bodies became entwined is not easy to forget. I don’t want to forget. However brief a time we have, I week to etch every moment together into my soul.

Fond memories of great bliss and wrinkled sheets is simply not enough. We can be more than two bodies seeking intimate contact. However, we don’t have to be more than necessary. There is potential in our passion. Why not realize it?

Let’s seek more than a warm body for our beds.

Let’s seek more than basic company on lonely nights.

Let’s seek more than friendly exchanges of flesh and feeling.

Where there is lust, there is the foundation for love. Where love is not possible, we still have moments to forge and feelings to embrace. There are countless souls on this world. We only ever have time to embrace a few. I want to be among those with which you shared yourself without regret. I can be that person, but only if you give us a chance.

Like a roll of the dice or a flash of lightning, the experience is a product of chaos and chance. In a world where losses always outnumber gains, there odds are against us, but the rewards are immense. History may dissuade us, but desire continues to drive us. I’m willing to navigate that chaos. Are you?

I am here.

You are here.

We are together.

Let’s make the most of it.

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November 17, 2018 · 9:34 am

Daily Sexy Musings: Lazy Saturday Loving

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Who doesn’t love a lazy Saturday? You know the ones I’m talking about. They’re those rare days where you go out of your way to clear your schedule, finish every errand, and make damn sure you have nothing major to worry about.

Ever since grade school, I’ve had a special appreciation for those days. It might have been because I was such an overly-stressed grade-grubber with self-esteem issues, but that’s beside the point. I still loved lazy Saturdays back then. I love them now, but as an adult, they’ve gained a sexier dimension.

I don’t deny that healthy, sexy romances take work. In fact, it takes a lot of work, physically and emotionally. That’s exactly why it’s important to set some time aside to enjoy the fruits of all that labor. A lazy Saturday is a perfect venue for that. For that reason, and plenty others, I dedicate this Daily Sexy Musing to the sexiest part of lazy Saturdays. Enjoy!

We turn the alarm off.

We silence our phones.

We lock the doors.

Free of distractions and unburdened of chores, this day is ours. We work and toiled all week to carve this special time for ourselves, a single day in which there are no distractions or deadlines to consume our lives. There’s just us, together on our own terms.

We don’t put on fancy clothes. Anything more formal than a pair of underwear is optional, at most. You and I don’t even need clothes for this day. We’re free to cut loose and run wild. There’s no one to impress, no image to maintain. It’s just us and our love, a feeling we can celebrate on our terms.

As we lay in bed, we marvel at the hour. The sun has been up for hours. For once, we’re not out and about, completing one task and lamenting over the next. There’s no commute to endure or gathering to attend. It’s so jarring, but in the best possible way.

I can just be me.

You can just be you.

We can just be us.

On a whim, we embrace. There’s no big setup, fancy clothes, or elaborate spectacle. We just hold each other, bed hair and all. We kiss, conveying as much energy as necessary and not a fraction more. We ditch what little clothes we have on. We make love under the sheets, simple and basic.

In that moment, everything is raw and unrefined. There are no obstacles to overcome or challenges to navigate. We just do what comes naturally and what’s more natural than our love? Whether felt or expressed, it’s so real on this day. That’s when it truly dawns on us.

We can make love multiple times.

We can sleep in for hours on end.

We can loft lazily on the couch, watching whatever we please.

The options are limitless, but there’s no pressure to choose. There’s no schedule to keep. We just do what we wish, guided only by whim and impulse. It’s not just a passing moment in between daily stresses. It’s an entire day for us and only us.

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November 15, 2018 · 5:50 am

Daily Sexy Musing: Verbal Foreplay

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I don’t consider myself a flirting expert, nor do I think very highly of the pick-up artist community. The idea of just bullshitting someone into sleeping with you doesn’t really sit well with me. Other than being unromantic, it comes off as the shallowest kind of intimacy. Sure, there’s a place for that sort of thing, but it doesn’t deserve to be glorified.

I’m still a big fan of using words as a catalyst for intimacy. I’m not just talking about the lurid dirty talk that often finds its way into my novels and sexy short stories. I genuinely believe that there’s an art to saying just the right thing in just the right way to turn a tender moment into something extra sexy. It’s not easy knowing how or when to say it, but when it works, it’s downright magical.

There have been only a handful of incidence where I can say with a straight face that I aroused a woman with my words. Those were amazing moments, though. I genuinely hope the women felt the same way. They helped affirm the power of sexy words and saying in just the right way.

The following Daily Sexy Musing is a tribute to how powerful that kind of sexy rhetoric can be. Regardless of gender or circumstances, it can turn a tiny spark into a passionate flame. You don’t need the wit of Shakespeare. You just need a willingness to turn sexy thoughts into sexier words. Enjoy!

I wait for a brief silence. In the chaos that is our lives, they don’t come by often. That makes every opportunity more precious and I intend to embrace every one of them. I need only you, me, and a quiet place where you can hear my voice above a whisper.

We’ve found just the right moment.

We’re in just the right place.

We have a chance to share illicit sentiment and I’m taking it.

I lean in and talk right into your ear. My tone is barely above a whisper, soft and direct so that there is no ambiguity. I leave nothing to chance. I make abundantly clear all the lurid things I want to do with you. Are you bold enough to handle that sentiment?

I say what needs to be said, unfiltered and uncensored. I await your reaction. I see you tense and I hear you gasp. I also notice your legs shifting, as though I struck just the right chord in your intimate anatomy. You try to hide it, but you don’t try very hard. You let me see your reaction. It says so much without a single word.

You turn and look at me. At first, you’re aghast. Moments later, you’re intrigued. Your expression changes. Gone is the look of innocence and restraint. In your eyes, I see the shackles come off. Your heart and your loins are freed. My words didn’t just pick the lock. It shattered every link on the chain.

You dive eagerly into my grasp.

You whisper devious musings into my ear.

You take my luscious verbiage and turn it against me.

Suddenly, the same chords are struck. Body, mind, and heart go in different directions, but make their way to the same destination. Our words provoke actions. Our actions inform passions. Those passions bring out the extremes of love, lust, and everything in between.

I offer more amorous rhetoric. You respond in kind. Like gusts of wind fueling a firestorm, it drives us to the highest peaks of desire. We don’t just remove our clothes. We rip them off. We don’t just caress one another. Together, we plunge into a sea of depthless desire.

All it took was a few words.

All it took was a distinct tone.

From our voice, the greatest acts of love and desire manifest before us.

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November 14, 2018 · 4:48 am

Improving Your Love Life And Your Sex Life (With Sleep)

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Maintaining a healthy romance is a lot like pursuing good sex. There’s no one right way to do it that works for everyone, but there are any number of wrong ways that can fail spectacularly. I’ve shared a few personal stories about my love life and even offered some insights on how to improve romance in the world of fiction. When it comes to real world advice, though, I try to be careful.

I’m not a relationship expert or a licensed therapist. I’m an aspiring erotica/romance writer who shares weekly sexy thoughts and bemoans how love is portrayed in popular media. Sure, I’ll occasionally give my opinion on serious issues involving gender politics and trends in popular culture, but I try to avoid giving the impression that I’m qualified to give advice.

However, there are a number of things we can all do for our love lives, a sex lives, and everything in between that makes it better. There are personal experiences that demonstrate it and even scientific research that supports it. Some are just common sense, but anyone who is familiar with the Darwin Awards knows that’s not always sufficient.

With that in mind, I’d like to offer the wonderful readers of this site the simplest and easiest advice they’ll ever get. It’ll improve your relationship. It’ll enhance your sex life. It’ll make you feel better, overall. What is the magical method that does so much to help so many aspects of your personal life? It’s simple.

Get better sleep.

That’s it. That is a real, effective method for improving your relationships, be it with a long-time lover or a one-night stand in Las Vegas. There’s no need for expensive therapy. You don’t have to pay a guru or a life coach. For once, it really is that simple. Get better sleep and your love life will improve.

Now, in the interest of not sounding too obvious, there are some details here that are worth highlighting. In recent years, the importance of getting a good night’s sleep has been become more critical. A great deal of research has shown a long list of benefits that come with good sleep and an equally lengthy list of detriments for those who don’t get enough.

Good sleep helps you lose weight, alleviate illness, and recover from serious injuries. None of that is news to anyone, but I get the sense that people don’t appreciate the role sleep plays in a healthy romance and a good sex life. That role goes beyond work and afterglow, as well.

According to research published in the Journal of Psychosomatic Medicine, poor sleep can disrupt your emotions and not just in terms of being groggy in the morning. Managing and regulating emotions is core component of any functional relationship. Even those who don’t mind melodrama are going to get burned out from someone who can’t figure out whether they’re stressed, miserable, or pissed off.

It even goes beyond messy emotional exchanges. That same study also showed a link between poor sleep and depression. Considering how depression tends to dull passion of any kind, romantic or otherwise, it’s understandable how it can undermine a relationship.

It’s even more understandable in terms of how it hurts your sex life. In addition to depression limiting your capacity to get in the mood, it also creates situations where people use sex as a band aid instead of a basic emotional expression. I’ve seen this happen before with friends and relatives. They try to use sex as an anti-depressant. It can offer temporary reprieve, but it does little to resolve any actual issues.

Then, there’s the simple logistics that a lack of sleep will create. If your lover is on a different sleep schedule than you, then that makes spending time together a chore because one of you is going to be groggy. Whether it’s due to work schedules or one person being a night owl, love can only do so much when a couple is rarely rested at the same time.

This goes beyond just being restless and buying overpriced lattes. A lack of sleep can actually cause damage to the brain. Sleep is supposed to be the time when your brain heals and refreshes itself after a long, arduous day. If it never gets a chance to heal, then that could impact everything from your memories to your emotions to your genitals.

Yes, a lack of sleep does have sexual side-effects. For men, it lowers testosterone, the magically masculine hormone that drives a significant part of the male libido. It effects men whether they’re gay, straight, bisexual, or trans. When your hormones are off, your sex life will suffer. It can even lead to erectile dysfunction, which is sure to compound that nasty mood I mentioned earlier.

Women experience a similar effect as well. On top of research showing that well-rested women tend to have more sex, a lack of sleep can make it significantly more difficult to achieve orgasm. At a time when women are already already dealing with an orgasm gap, this certainly doesn’t help. Even with adequate sleep, a lack of orgasms can hurt any relationship.

Again, a lot of this is common sense, but for those looking to improve or maintain their love lives, it may seem too common. It goes against the standard romantic narrative that two people in love always have to be doing something. They always have to be off going on adventures, working hard every hour of every day to stay in love, have great sex, and grow together.

While there’s certainly a place for that kind of effort in a relationship, it doesn’t have to come at the cost of a good night’s sleep. If anything, a couple sharing a restful night in bed together should count as an act of genuine romance. It doesn’t even have to come after sex or even involve nudity, although couples who sleep naked do enjoy added benefits.

Ideally, good sleep shouldn’t just be a byproduct of a quality romance. It should be part of the process. It could be as easy as communicating with your lover how much sleep you need, when to do it, and what helps you feel most rested. It may sound mundane, but these are little things that real loving couples often overlook.

One of my old college roommates actually got sleep down to a science. He and his girlfriend made a genuine effort to line up their sleep cycles so perfectly that I could pretty much set my watch to when they would turn in. It wasn’t always romantic, but I can’t argue with the results. They were together that entire semester and I rarely saw them in a bad mood.

Most people, whether they’re in a relationship or not, are willing to put in the work to make romance work. They’re just as willing to listen to gurus, pop pills, and read sexy stories to improve their sex lives as well. While I try to do my part with the sexy stories I tell, I think it’s ironic that just getting better sleep rarely comes to mind.

Even if it makes too much sense, it’s probably the easiest way for anyone to improve their relationship. We already know how to sleep. Most of us relish the opportunity to get more. If more sleep means better sex and quality romance, then it more than warrants a higher priority in our intimate efforts.

After all, a good lover is a well-rested lover.

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November 13, 2018 · 5:49 am

Daily Sexy Musing: Make-Up Sex

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I don’t care how good a relationship a couple has. At some point, they’re going to have a fight. Sometimes, it’s over something petty, like who didn’t do the laundry or who didn’t take out the trash. Other times, it can be pretty serious. I’m talking on the level of sleeping with the neighbor or running over the dog.

The strength of a relationship isn’t in how well they avoid these situations. It’s how well they endure them. Couples who really love each other and work on their relationship figure out how to get through those rough times. It can be hard, but they come out stronger in the long run. In many cases, the greatest manifestation of that strength is make-up sex.

Now, I feel as though make-up sex gets a bad rap. Every time it shows up in the erotica/romance genre, it’s portrayed as a crutch. It’s something couples use to mask the breadth of their problems. I don’t agree with this portrayal. I think it’s only a small part of a much larger story.

I intend to tell some of those stories, both in my novels and in my sexy short stories. In the meantime, this Daily Sexy Musing is my first attempt to re-establish the inherent sex appeal of make-up sex. Enjoy!

You’re upset.

I’m upset.

We’re both upset and we’re both to blame.

I don’t remember how it started. First, I did something. Then, I didn’t do something in response. You got angry and I got angry too. The things we said came from an unclear, irrational place. For a moment, all the good we had done and the trust we had established was forgotten.

It tears at my heart. I hate being mad at you. I know you hate it too. I see it in your eyes. The tears give away your anguish. It hurts you to direct such hatred towards me. It leaves wounds that cut deep, forging memories not easily forgotten. It’s a special kind of pain, one only possible when it comes from a person you love.

It doesn’t have to break us. It can’t. Our love is too strong. The work, passion, and energy we put in is too durable. I let you say what needs to be said. I say my part as well, but not a word more. We lay everything out for one another, our outrage and flaws laid bare.

I see you at your worst.

You see me at my lowest.

Together, it is our lowest point.

Then, in this moment of frustration and rage, something magical happens. We fall silent. On a whim, we decide to place our faith in the love and trust we have for each other. We gamble that our love is stronger than the source of our anger.

In the end, it pays off.

What is said and unsaid sends the right message. As quickly as we forgot our love, we remember it with sobering relief. I throw my arms around you and we embrace. You kiss me as though my life depends on it. I can literally feel your love entering me, washing over all the negative feelings that once drove us apart.

Now, we are together again. We are still wounded and in pain, but in a perfect position to heal. We tear our clothes off, find the nearest piece of furniture that can support our weight, and channel every feeling into something beautiful.

Pain becomes pleasure.

Hate becomes love.

Despair becomes ecstasy.

We can argue, disagree, and clash. We can never avoid the flaws of a world that seeks to undermine our love. However, we can make up for it and make our love stronger.

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November 9, 2018 · 5:53 am

Daily Sexy Musing: Cold Night Snuggling

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Halloween has passed. The days are getting shorter. It’s also getting noticeably colder outside. Unless you live in a tropical climate, in which case you’re the envy of many in my part of the world, these factors all lead to one critically sexy outcome. Snuggling is in and it’s about to get a lot more pragmatic.

I’ve already celebrated the joys of cuddling, but I make some key distinctions between cuddling and snuggling. As a self-professed romantic, I believe there are major differences and most people know them when they feel them. Cuddling is informal, playful, and supplementary to quality romance. Snuggling is more intimate and direct, allowing it to complement romance rather than just enhance it.

Before fire, snuggling was a key source of heat. There are logistics to it, which become even more necessary once we enter the fall and winter months. A good snuggle doesn’t just help us stay warm. It reminds us that we have a love in our lives that provides us with warmth, shelter, and protection in a very literal sense. Seriously, what could be more romantic than that?

This Daily Sexy Musing celebrates both the logistics and sentiment of snuggling. I hope it gives lovers out there something to contemplate on the many cold nights that await us this winter.

The night arrives. An unforgiving cold sweeps across the land. There’s no escaping it. Everywhere it goes, it seeks to expunge warmth and contentment. We cannot escape it, nor can we fight it. However, we can endure.

Alone, we only brave the coldness of the night.

Together, we dare defy it.

Unafraid of the looming darkness, we shed our clothes and gather blankets. We then surround ourselves in layers, insulating us from the icy touch of the night. Under the welcome shelter, we find each other. We follow one another to the only remaining source of heat. Thankfully, we don’t have to venture far.

The sun may be gone, but there is still warmth to be found. From you, the same flesh that arouses my every sense is now my salvation from the unforgiving gold. From me, I offer similar reprieve. I welcome you into my warmth. I share with you the sanctuary born from love, desire, and compassion.

I wrap you in my arms.

I surround you with my love.

I protect you as you protect me.

As our skin touches, heat fuels more heat. The cold attempts to snuff it out, but it fails miserably. There’s no stopping us. Our desire to keep each other warm proves too strong. Our need to survive the night proves too tenacious. By ourselves, we were vulnerable. With each other, we are stronger than any night.

Curled up under the sheets, creating more heat with every gesture, we smile. It is an affront to the cold and the darkness that spreads it. Where there was once despair and discomfort, we create a new domain for our passion. The night air can fight us all it wants. We’ll just fight harder with our love.

It starts with a simple snuggle, warm flesh warming warm flesh, the heat compounding every step of the way. It culminates in multiple ways. On one path, the heat allows us to make love. On one path, the heat allows us a peaceful sleep. In between, there are many others. All lead to a world of contentment.

Our bodies entwined, we navigate the cold night.

Our bodies entwined, we turn vulnerability into strength.

Our bodies entwined, we turn thoughts of passion into feelings of warmth.

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November 7, 2018 · 5:05 am

Daily Sexy Musings: Fighting Stress (The Sexy Way)

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Ever have one of those days where every minute feels like another 60 seconds of compounding stress? Maybe a better question would be how many of those days have you had in the past month? I’ve certainly had those days. Going all the way back to high school, I’ve had more than a few instances where I’ve cursed the clock for going too damn slow.

As rough as these days can be, they’re also the times in which we need a little extra loving. I remember one particular day in college where I was so stressed out that I wanted to punch the nearest brick wall. Then, my girlfriend at the time called me and talked dirty to me, as only she could. I felt better almost instantly.

There are, of course, many ways to relieve stress. This dose of my Daily Sexy Musings celebrates the sexier methods. There are plenty of those two, but their effectiveness is beyond dispute. It even goes beyond stress relief. When you can make someone happy after such a shitty day, you know you’ve got something special. Enjoy!

I drag myself through the door. Every step feels like a march through quicksand. I enter a home that only welcomes me with silence, numb to the day I just endured. I want to collapse where I stand. I wish I could punch this day in the jaw and spit in its face. That’s how much I hate it.

Then, you appear before me. In a sea of chaos and frustration, you pierce the veil and shatter the darkness. Your face, your gaze, and your presence stop my anguish dead in its tracks. I open my mouth to speak. Only an angry string of incoherent cursing comes out. It doesn’t dissuade you in the slightest.

You don’t say a word.

I fall silent.

Finally, this long, arduous day ceases.

I remain silent, fuming as though the air is stabbing me from every angle. You brave the storm, approaching me without fear or reservation. I grit my teeth and fight the turmoil within, forcing back the onslaught of misery that has bombarded me throughout the day. Your presence gives me strength, but it only goes so far.

You see my angry poise.

You sense my distress on every level.

You reach out into the sorrow and find me in its grasp.

The battle within is failing. This day has me on the brink of defeat. Then, you take me into your arms. You hold me, kiss me, and entwine your spirit with mine. Almost instantly, the tide turns. I fall back from the brink.

As you hold me, a new strength enters me. Every tense fiber relaxes. A lifeline comes my way and I seize it. Once again, you are my anchor. You guide me through strife, easing my anguish and replacing it with peace.

We don’t stop with simple touch. On the spot, you remove my clothes. With them, you strip me of the burdens I’ve born. Naked and exposed, I stand before you someone wounded by so many forces. However, I need only your love and your sex to heal.

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