This video is another video from my YouTube channel, Jack’s World. And it’s another entry in my ongoing Jack Quick Reacts series in which I react to Harley Quinn’s “A Very Problematic Valentine’s Day Special.” Enjoy!
Category Archives: romance
Jack Quick Reacts: Harley Quinn A Very Problematic Valentine’s Day Special
Filed under HBO Max, Jack's World, LGBTQ, romance, superhero comics, superhero movies, YouTube
Happy Valentine’s Day (And Super Bowl Recovery Day)!
Today is Valentine’s Day. As a lover of romance, I appreciate the sentiment behind it. As someone who has been single for quite some time now, my enthusiasm is a bit muted. I hope that changes one year. It didn’t happen this year, but I certainly encourage all the lucky couples out there to celebrate.
On top of Valentine’s Day, today is also the day after the Super Bowl. For many sports fans, like myself, it’s very much an unofficial holiday. However, it’s a unique holiday in that it’s mostly about recovering from the previous day. We spend so much time and energy, getting excited for the Super Bowl and making this special event. It’s exhilarating, but exhausting, especially if you’ve had a few too many beers.
As I write this, I can confirm that I had quite a few beers last night. In my defense, it was a damn good game. The Los Angeles Rams beat the Cincinnati Bengals, winning 23 to 20 after a final drive in the last two minutes. That’s how you want a championship game to end. That’s how it should end after such an arduous season.
For today, I intend to spend most of the time just digesting all the junk I ate last night and healing from all the alcohol intake. I will try to do something special in the spirit of Valentine’s Day, like re-watch my favorite movies or work on some sexy short stories. It’ll just be more challenging because I’m just still buzzing from that game.
If you’re a football fan, who happens to have a lover, try and rise to the challenge. We were all lucky to have such a great game to cap off the season. It’s going to be a long wait until the next football season. With today being Valentine’s Day, use that as a chance to refocus your energy. Your lover will thank you for it.
One day, I hope to celebrate a day like this with my future wife. For now, I’ll just enjoy the spirit of the day while also taking in the post-Super Bowl afterglow.
To that end, I offer one final message for today.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
Also, congratulations to Super Bowl LVI champions Los Angeles Rams!
How “Groundhog Day” Made Me A Romance Fan
The following is a video from my YouTube channel, Jack’s World. It’s a celebration and an exploration of “Groundhog Day,” the 1993 romantic comedy that helped make me a romance fan. It was based off an article I wrote a while back. I supplemented some details from that piece in this video. Enjoy!
Filed under Jack's World, romance, YouTube
Recounting The First Time I Felt Attracted To A Girl
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We all have certain moments in our lives that really stick out. As adults, we tend to remember these moments vividly. Sometimes, we even know when a particular moment is going to stick with us for years to come. Whether it’s the loss of a loved one, getting your dream job, or meeting that special someone, we can remember every little detail and understand why it matters.
When we’re kids, it’s just not the same. Those moments don’t impact us in quite the same way. It’s just a byproduct of being a kid. You’re young and inexperienced. You have no idea how one particular moment will affect you for years to come.
However, there’s often one particular moment in every kid’s life that heavily informs how their adult life plays out. It has to do with that special part of growing up where you start feeling real attraction to someone else. It doesn’t manifest the same way with every kid, but whether they’re straight, gay, bisexual, or something else entirely, it still happens and it can be overwhelming.
Some people can pin down the exact moment when they started feeling attracted to someone. For others, it’s a messier process. Suddenly, you start looking at others in a very different way. You know what love is. You feel it from your family. However, this is something very different.
One moment, you think members of the opposite sex are icky and gross.
The next, you find yourself drawn to them in a profound way.
I don’t care how well-adjusted you are as a kid. That’s going to be confusing, overwhelming, and even a little scary. It’s often one of the first real signs that we’re growing up. We’re starting to become adults.
In that spirit, I’d like to share another personal story about the moment I first felt attracted to a girl. I promise it’s not too crazy or extreme in any way. It’s just one of those parts of my life that I didn’t realize was such a big deal until many years later. I suspect others might have had a similar experience. Theirs might even be more eventful than mine. Whatever their story, I hope this one helps others appreciate those experiences.
To set the stage, this moment took place when I was in the fourth grade. I remember it more vividly than most my elementary school experience. Part of that was because I had this really charismatic teacher. He was such a fun guy and he definitely made school less mundane. He also was big on letting everyone socialize. He was less inclined to lecture us and more inclined to give us activities that we could do in groups.
I certainly didn’t mind that. It beat reading textbooks. However, this also coincided with a time in my life when my social awkwardness really took hold. As I’ve noted before, my social skills have always been sub-par. Even as a kid, I really struggled to make friends, connect with people, and develop lasting connections.
On top of all that, I was somewhat obnoxious at that age. My parents and siblings can attest to this. When I was in the fourth grade, I wasn’t always drawing inside the lines, so to speak. I had a tendency to overreact to things and I didn’t always think before I spoke. While that never got me into serious trouble, it did further compound my social awkwardness.
Then, add being attracted to girls to the mix. It’s hard to put into words just how much that complicated things.
Now, I want to say I was a bit more prepared than most when it came to girls, albeit not by much. Unlike a lot of other boys my age, I never went through a “girls have cooties” stage. I also never went through a period where I thought girls were gross or anything like that.
It helped that I had friends who were girls. Some of my closest cousins were girls. I never saw them as this strange mystery. They were just other people with different body parts. That was it.
It also helped I got along better with girls than boys at that time. At lunch, I would often sit at a table populated by girls. It wasn’t because I was attracted to them. I just didn’t make a lot of friends with the boys. Plus, a lot of the boys I knew in the 4th grade were annoying.
I was comfortable with this setup for the most part. Then, something strange happened with this girl I had sat near during the latter part of the year. I won’t give her name, out of respect for her privacy. I’ll just call her Sue.
Sue was a nice girl with a bright smile and short brown hair. I distinctly remember her laughing a lot. She had a great sense of humor and she appreciated dirty jokes more than most girls. Naturally, I became friendly with her and she became friendly with me. We weren’t exactly close, but we liked being around each other.
In the beginning, I just saw her the same way I had seen so many other girls. She was a friend and I liked her. That was it.
Towards the end of the school year, though, I started feeling something more. I started looking at her differently. I distinctly remember getting a strange feeling around her that I didn’t get around other girls. At first, I thought I was just being obnoxious again. Eventually, I realized it was something more.
I was actually attracted to this girl.
I was really, sincerely drawn to her in a way that was legitimately romantic.
Granted, there’s only so much romantic sentiment a 4th grader could feel, but I knew it was there. Reading superhero comics with romantic sub-plots helped me recognize the signs. I still wasn’t entirely sure how to deal with it. I didn’t really talk about it at first.
However, I do remember one distinct moment in the late spring where I made this comment out of the blue during a class activity. It had been a joke, albeit a very bad one. I don’t remember all the details. I just remember referencing Beth by name and making it clear that I was attracted to her.
She laughed.
The whole class laughed.
I felt so embarrassed that my face blushed bright red.
At the time, I really felt stupid. Perhaps it was for the best that after that year, I never saw Beth again. I know she still went to the same school, but she ended up in other classes. I honestly don’t know if she remembers me or what I said. However, I doubt I’ll ever forget her.
She was very much a turning point in my young life. She was the first girl I looked at and felt real, tangible attraction. I knew what these feelings were and I knew they were more adult than kid. It was really the first sign that I was starting to transfer from kid to adult. While I still had to endure some horribly awkward teenage years, that moment marked the first step.
For that, I’ll always be grateful to Beth. I don’t know if she understood those feelings or if she ever felt that way about me. As I’ve gotten older, though, I’ve come to appreciate that moment and the part she played.
That’s my unique story about the first moment I felt attracted to a girl. I know it’s somewhat tame, but I still felt it was worth sharing. If anyone else has a similar story that they’d like to share, please do so in the comments. These moments are profound points in our lives. They’re worth sharing, but they’re also worth learning from.
Filed under Jack Fisher's Insights, real stories, romance
To My Future Wife: Some Quick Notes
I’m a big fan of romance. I hope all the sexy short stories and erotica romance novels I’ve written have made that abundantly. However, I don’t just enjoy writing about it. At some point, I do want to experience a real-life romance with that special someone one day.
I know true love is real and it is powerful. I’ve seen my siblings meet the person they would go onto marry. I’ve seen it with my parents, my friends, and other real people who have shared their stories.
There’s love worth seeking and cherishing. That, I’m sure of. It hasn’t happened for me just yet. In fact, among my siblings, I’m the only one who is still single. I haven’t been in a serious relationship for quite some time and a global pandemic has not helped in that respect.
However, I still hold out hope that I will one day meet that special woman. I don’t know when it’ll happen. Everyone I know says I’ll it when I meet her. I’m inclined to take their word for it. When that time comes, I look forward to the day when we can get married, build a life, and grow old together.
I don’t pretend to know who that special woman is, what she’ll look like, and when I’ll meet her. For all I know, she may never read this. I’m not going to assume she will. Even so, I want to take an opportunity to send my future wife a message. Whether or not she heeds it is entirely up to her.
What follows are some notes to this special someone with whom I hope to share my life with. Some are tips. Some are bits of advice. Some are just hard facts that we’ll both have to work around. I’m sure she’ll have a list of her own, but I won’t know it until I meet her. In the meantime, here’s my list for my future wife, wherever she may be.
I have terrible bed hair and sometimes go the entire day without fixing it. Yes, I know it looks goofy. It just doesn’t bother me.
If I can put hot sauce on something, I probably will. That’s not an insult to your cooking or mine. I just love hot sauce.
Wednesday is New Comic Book Day. I always get up early for New Comic Book Day, sometimes as early as 4:30 a.m. I’ll do my best not to wake you, but I apologize in advance if I do.
I sleep naked. I enjoy sleeping naked. It’s not a sexual thing. I just enjoy how it feels. You have been warned.
I can’t dance worth a damn, even with the aid of alcohol and music I love. If I embarrass you, I apologize in advance. If you think my terrible dancing is cute, I’ll gladly do it as often as I can.
I’m at my most relaxed with my morning coffee and my bath robe. That’s just useful to know.
I’m very good at sticking to a regiment. If I ever deviate unexpectedly, assume there’s a good reason. If I don’t tell you that reason, you can assume something is wrong. Don’t be afraid to pry because it sometimes takes a while for me to put it into words.
I will get emotional during certain TV shows and movies. I’ll try to hide it, but I won’t try very hard.
During football season, I build my entire Sundays around watching football. Unless something serious comes up, don’t expect me to change it.
I’m a hugger, by nature. If I hug you unexpected, don’t assume there’s an agenda behind it. I just enjoy a nice hug.
Filed under Jack Fisher's Insights, romance
The Dragon Prince: A Case Study In Developing (Quality) Romance
The following is a video from my YouTube channel, Jack’s World. It’s my first video about a show I discovered on Netflix called “The Dragon Prince.” It’s very likely it won’t be the last because this show has captured my heart in all the right ways. There are many things that make it great, but one of the best happens to involve romance. Given my fondness for romance and writing romantic stories, that definitely adds to the appeal.
In this particular video, I highlight and celebrate how the show’s main romantic sub-plot involving Callum and Rayla raised he bar for love stories everywhere. Seriously, if you’re a romance fan, this show is worth watching just for that. Hopefully, this video helps make that case. Enjoy!
Filed under romance, television, The Dragon Prince, YouTube
My Top 5 Date Night (Superhero) Movies
When we have two things we love, it’s only natural to look for a way to combine them. Without that inclination, we wouldn’t have such wonderful combinations like chocolate and peanut butter or beer and buffalo wings. It’s almost an instinct, mixing the things we cherish in hopes of compounding the joy.
As a fan of romance and superhero movies, I’ve certainly had this inclination before. I’ve built dates around going to a superhero movie. When I was with my ex-girlfriend, we would organize our evenings around a particular superhero movie or TV show that we both loved. It made for more than a few memorable moments, the details of which I’ll save for my novels and sexy short stories.
I know I’m not the only one who enjoys mixing date nights with superhero movies. The massive box office haul generated by superhero movies essentially guarantees that at least one couple has built their date night around them. I have friends and relatives who have used superhero movies, both in the theaters and at homes, to supplement their date night.
With this being a thing in our current cultural landscape, I thought I’d craft my own short-list for the best superhero movies to see on date night. Keep in mind, this list isn’t about which superhero movies are the best or most entertaining. These are the movies that evoke just the right combination of emotions that help make a romantic evening more intimate.
It doesn’t have to involve a major romantic sub-plot, although that helps. It also can’t be all spectacle and flare. There’s a time and a place for those kinds of movies, superhero or otherwise. For date night, the goal is to stir up passion and inspire romantic moments. Having seen pretty much every superhero movie multiple times, and also being a fan of romance, I feel uniquely qualified to craft such a list.
What follows are my top 5 superhero movies for date night. I imagine others will have a different list. I’m sure plenty will strongly disagree with my choice and ranking. That’s perfectly fine. This is just my assessment on which superhero movies are best suited for a fun, romantic date night. Enjoy!
Number 5: Captain America: The First Avenger
For those who cheered Captain America on in the final battle against Thanos in “Avengers: Endgame,” it’s easy to forget that he had a long journey to becoming the living legend we known and love. That journey began in “Captain America: The First Avenger” and while it didn’t gross $2 billion at the box office, it gave everyone a reason to root for Steve Rogers.
A big part of that journey involved a romantic sub-plot that was simple, basic, and inherently lovable. Before he became a Captain, Steve Rogers was just a lanky soldier who set his patriotic eyes on the beautiful, charismatic Peggy Carter. She wasn’t just a pretty face, either. She played an integral part in helping Steve become the hero he sought to be. It’s a beautiful story that just happens to have romantic undertones.
There’s plenty of action. There’s plenty of intrigue as well, in that this movie helped set the stage for the first “Avengers” movie. However, the heart and depth of Steve’s love for Peggy strikes all the right chords. It makes Captain America’s journey more personal. He’s not just this paragon of American ideals. He’s a man who seeks to serve his country and love a good woman.
It’s a simple story with lovable characters. That’s an essential combination for any successful date night movie.
Number 4: Wonder Woman
There are a lot of things that “Wonder Woman” did well. For a movie that had so much riding on it, both for the superhero genre and for female superheroes, the success it achieved at the box office is nothing short of remarkable. It’s only fitting that it checks most of the boxes for a good date night movie.
It’s an epic story full of gods, monsters, war, and humanity. Yes, there’s a great romantic sub-plot mixed in with Wonder Woman and Steve Trevor, but that sub-plot works because everything around it works. They both navigate unfamiliar territory together, sharing both the journey and the drama. Along the way, they help one another. They learn from one another. They make each other stronger.
At its core is the sheer heart it conveys. It has always been Wonder Woman’s greatest strength and this movie does everything necessary to capture it. Any couple seeing this movie will find moments that will make them smile and fill them with the urge to cuddle. The epic battles that Wonder Woman leads, along with Gal Gadot’s wonderful performance, is a nice bonus as well.
Number 3: Dark Phoenix
As big an X-Men fan as I am, I’ll be the first to concede that the movies have been hit or miss over the years. Some have been great. Some have been nauseatingly awful. However, even the most acclaimed X-Men movies rarely have the attributes of a good date night movie. That changed with “Dark Phoenix.” Of all the X-Men movies not associated with Deadpool, this one has all the traits of quality date night movie.
It’s not just a superhero movie. It’s not just a re-telling of one of the X-Men’s most iconic stories in the Phoenix Saga. This is a movie built on high drama and powerful emotions. Much like the Phoenix Force itself, the strength of the story and the characters involved stem from emotions. There’s love, loss, anguish, and sacrifice. Tears are shed, anger is shared, and the pain is palpable.
These are all core aspects of what made the original story in the comics so endearing. They’re also the sentiments that make a great date movie. The story isn’t all world-ending spectacle. It’s personal and emotional. What happens to Jean Grey and her friends in “Dark Phoenix” is both dramatic and powerful. It evokes the kinds of feelings you want to share.
There are plenty of other elements in this movie that are worth praising. I covered many of them in the review I wrote for this movie. While I wouldn’t go so far as to call “Dark Phoenix” the best X-Men movie, I’m comfortable saying it’s the best X-Men movie to share with a date.
Number 2: Deadpool
This is one of those movies that caught a lot of people by surprise in the best possible way. Without a doubt, the first “Deadpool” wildly exceeded everyone’s expectations, from X-Men fans to romance fans to fans of anything associated with Ryan Reynolds. Between the box office it generated and the praise it earned, it’s easy to forget that this movie is built around a love story.
That’s not just the musings of a self-professed romantic. That’s exactly what the movie says through Ryan Reynolds’ uncanny charm. Even the marketing for this movie teased its romantic undertones and for good reason. As funny, crude, and violent as Deadpool was, the movie was still built around romance and it was built well.
The love between Wade Wilson and Vanessa was genuine, sexy, and sweet. A lot of Deadpool’s motivations and antics were a direct result of his love for Vanessa. It’s the kind of love story that will make you smile, laugh, and even gag a bit. For any couple looking for a little of everything in a date night movie, “Deadpool” delivers all that and then some.
It’s the kind of romance that’s genuinely fun. No matter how serious you are with your lover, it’s important to have a little fun and “Deadpool” never misses an opportunity to have fun. That kind of spirit can only help anyone’s date night.
Number 1: Guardians of the Galaxy 2
Finding the perfect date night movie isn’t easy. Finding one that has just the right amount of fun, entertainment, and dramatic impact can test any couple’s patience. Sometimes, a movie is too serious and ceases to be entertaining. Sometimes, a movie is too theatrical, so to speak, and the drama just feels flat. Striking that balance is very challenging, but “Guardians of the Galaxy 2” proves it’s not impossible.
Of all the superhero movies I’ve seen, few hit me with as many feels as this one and it did so without going too heavy on the romance. While there were plenty of romantic elements throughout the story, the greatest strength of this movie was how it gets you to care about these characters. The fact that they include a talking tree, a rocket with a machine gun, and a guy named Taserface is secondary.
This movie had plenty of colorful moments that were funny and quirky. Like its predecessor, it dared to have fun with the genre. However, the fun never got in the way of the drama or the characters. There were elements of family, including parents and sibling rivalries. There were secrets and revelations that hit you in all the right ways. Even when you re-watch the movie, it still has an impact.
It evokes a wide range of feelings, more so than a typical romance movie. The sheer breadth of those feelings is what makes “Guardians of the Galaxy 2” an experience worth sharing. If you’re with someone who appreciates those feelings, then this movie will do plenty to satisfy. It’s the kind of movie that you can still enjoy by yourself, but it’s best when shared with someone special.
As I noted earlier, this is just my personal list. If you think there are other quality date night superhero movies, please make your case in the comments. I’d love to hear them. Given the rich slate of superhero movies planned for the coming years, this list is sure to change.
Finding Love Has Become An Extended Job Interview (And For Good, Yet Unromantic Reasons)
Being a self-professed romantic and an aspiring erotica/romance writer, I often scrutinize the nature of romance more than most. Whereas some might watch a movie or TV show and see the basics of a romantic sub-plot, I’ll dig much deeper. I’ll identify which romances are inherently flawed, why some work beautifully, and why love triangles are inherently awful.
That scrutiny goes beyond media, popular culture, and my own efforts to tell a good love story. I often find myself observing how romance unfolds in real life. Whether it’s how people have pursued romance in the past to my own romantic endeavors, there’s a lot to break down and it doesn’t always make sense. Love isn’t known for being rational, after all.
It’s because of this tendency of mine that I notice things that rarely come up in discussions about romance. Recently, I realized something profound while reading several stories about how modern dating has changed in recent years, of which there are many.
Modern romance has become more a job interview than an emotional journey.
I imagine some will roll their eyes at that notion. Some might even agree with it and not need any convincing. A few probably think I’m giving this too much thought, even for a romance fan. That may be a fair point, but I believe the evolution of modern romance is becoming a lot less romantic.
To be fair, finding has undergone many upheavals throughout history. It wasn’t until the past couple centuries that people actually married for love. Those who claim to champion “traditional” marriage probably aren’t aware that marriage and formal relationships were little more than passionless business contracts for most of human history.
Love and romance were always there. We, as human beings, are hardwired to form loving bonds. It just took different forms and people went about it in very different ways. Most people have a general idea of how people go about it today. It tends to go something like this.
- Two people meet, either in person or online
- There’s a spark of attraction
- They both pursue each other
- They go on dates to learn about one another and explore their romantic connection
- If the connection is strong enough, they forge a lasting relationship and build a life together
Granted, this is an exceedingly gross simplification. It still covers most of the basics. That’s the problem, though. It only deals with the basics and people are rarely basic.
It starts shortly after a mutual attraction is established. Once two people start pursuing one another, the dating phase starts. Movies, TV shows, and romance novels tend to be vague about how this unfolds. However, it’s here where the parallels with job interviews start to show.
While a love story may depict candle-lit dinners, coordinated dancing, and intimate gestures, the bulk of that process tends to involve more pragmatic acts. For two people to understand whether they’re romantically compatible, they need to get to know one another. To get to know one another, they need to interact.
That, in and of itself, doesn’t make dating indistinguishable from a job interview. For that, the modern structure of relationships is what fosters that and I’m not just referring to marriage. This affects couples who cohabitate, as well as those who are serial monogamists.
From a logistical standpoint, a modern romance has many moving parts. It’s not enough to just be attracted to one another, enjoy each other’s company, or have great sex. People often have to find a way to fit one another into their lives. There are jobs, career aspirations, and living situations to consider.
These days, people aren’t as likely to stay in the same place they were born in, especially if the opportunities in that town are limited. The same goes for their families. Even if they stay, sometimes their parents or extended family move away. Maybe it’s for retirement, going to college, or pursuing their own romantic interests. Having to accommodate all that into a relationship can be daunting.
In the same way you might be qualified for a job, but not in a position to take it, you might find yourself in a similar relationship with romance. All the emotional, physical, and sexual chemistry is there. However, you’re just not in a position to pursue it. You can’t maintain that relationship when you’re both living in other time zones or pursuing different paths.
That’s not to say long distance relationships can’t work, but it’s like trying to do a job remotely. There’s only so much you can do when you’re not present. If that weren’t the case, everyone would work from home or from a tropical paradise. I that as someone who has been unable to pursue major opportunities and broken up from good relationships due to distance.
Even if you can work around issues of distance and time, there’s also the matter of becoming entwined with family affairs. As the “Meet The Parents” trilogy so hilariously demonstrates, being with someone is rarely just about being with them, individually. At some point, if the romance is to be serious, their family will get involved.
That process can be as complicated as matching qualifications for a specialized job on a resume. You’ve got to make sure both families can get along. They can’t just tolerate each other at the wedding or during the holidays. They have to be capable of co-existing in a way that doesn’t undercut the romance.
It’s very similar from having a job that matches your skill set, but for an organization that is just insufferable. A lot of people have had to endure jobs they hated, even if they paid well or matched their various talents. When the organization within the job is awful, then even a dream job can be awful.
You can love someone with all your heart. You might even have someone your family loves. However, if your lover’s family is an absolute pain, then the romance will suffer. Now that relationships aren’t just business arrangements, we have to navigate around one another’s lives and their families. To do that, it’s necessary to treat dating like a job interview.
You have figure out if this person fits into your life.
You have to figure out if their hopes, dreams, and abilities match what you’re looking for.
You have to prove that your hopes, dreams, and abilities match theirs as well.
You have to determine whether you fit into the organization of their life and their family.
Ultimately, you have to build that shared life together around all of that, knowing that breaking up/being fired/quitting comes with a personal/professional cost.
On the surface, it’s hardly romantic. At the same time, there’s an undeniable pragmatism to it. As society has evolved, complete with more egalitarian gender roles and fewer taboos about being single, we’re in a better position to chart our own romantic path. We don’t just have to settle for limited options and few opportunities. We can dare to seek something greater.
As a byproduct, the basic romantic elements of intimate chemistry can never be enough. It’s necessary, if not unavoidable, to assess a prospective lover’s entire life to determine of that romance is even viable. It’s not easy and it’s exceedingly imperfect, as the rate of divorce and abusive relationships indicates.
However, being the romantic I am, I still say it’s worth pursuing. That process is still very likely to change as society, technology, and attitudes change. The impacts of the COVID-19 pandemic are sure to change it even more. Whether it becomes more or less like a job interview remains to be seen.
Filed under gender issues, human nature, Love Or Obsession, psychology, romance
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