Tag Archives: sexy comedy

When I wrote my regular entry of Sexy Sunday Thoughts last week, I did so while watching the sun rise over the beach. As soon as I was finished, I put on my swim trunks, lathered up with enough sunscreen for a trip to Venus, and spent the rest of the day at the beach. It was as fun and sexy as it sounds.

That was last week, though. This week is a bit different. By that, I mean I’m not looking at the sun rising over the beach in a pristine display of nature’s beauty. I’m back home, hunched over a desk, and stuck looking at overly sexy bikini ads as the closest I’ll get to seeing real bikinis until next summer.

On top of that, I’m dealing with a nasty sunburn. Yes, I know I just said I lathered up with enough sunscreen to make me smell like a coconut factory. No, it didn’t work completely. Sure, I managed to avoid getting the more sensitive parts of my body burned. I’ll let you use your sexy imagination to see what I mean. Some parts, however, did not escape the sun’s wrath.

For the past few days, I’ve been treating those burns with whatever remedy I can find at a drug store. It can only do so much, though. In my experience, a little sexy musings help aid in the process. So with that in mind, I dedicate this week’s edition of Sexy Sunday Thoughts to those recovering from sun burn. Hang in there, folks. The sun can burn your skin, but it cannot snuff your sexiness.

“As the prevalence of self-driving cars increases, so too will the number of children conceived in them.”

“It’s easy to confuse true love and great sex, but even easier to not give a damn on most days.”

“The sound women make when they orgasm is akin music whereas the sound men make is akin to getting a tooth pulled.”

“The association between cigarettes and sex is hypocritical when you consider that nobody finds coughing that very sexy.”

“When you think about it, there aren’t a whole lot of steps between being a hugger and being a slut.”

“Having too many horny men in a particular area is likely to result in crimes, but having too many women is likely to result in a party.”

“The popularity of sex toys has given men too many reasons to be suspicious of anything a woman owns that vibrates.”

I hope those sexy thoughts aid in the healing process for whatever sunburns anyone incurred by laying out by the pool, lounging on the beach, or just generally doing something outside that allowed them to omit some clothing. I know it burns. I know it doesn’t look that sexy. That said, I’d still say it was worth it.