Jack Fisher’s Sexy Sunday Thoughts: Super Bowl LV Edition

It’s finally here!

The holiest of holy days for football fans has arrived!

Super Bowl LV is set to kick off in Tampa on this most glorious of annual sporting events. As a lifelong football fan, this is a day that’s near and dear to my heart. I don’t always care who’s playing. I just want to see a damn good game while eating chicken wings and drinking beer.

I’ve been eating light and working out more in preparation for this, as always. This is also one of those Super Bowls where you don’t really need to do much to hype it up. All the tag lines are there.

It’s Tampa Bay vs. Kansas City.

It’s Tom Brady versus Patrick Mahomes.

It’s the greatest quarterback of all time versus someone who could end up becoming the greatest.

I don’t doubt for a second that this is the match-up that the NFL marketing department hoped for when the playoff started. Even if you’re not a fan of either teams, you can’t deny the weight of this match-up. These are two great teams led by two of the best quarterbacks of our generation. I’m ready for this. My heart, body, and liver is just so ready.

I don’t think I need to say much more to excite my fellow football fans. For the rest of the day, it’s all about counting down the seconds to kick-off. In a year where every week was in doubt due to the pandemic, the fact we made it to the Super Bowl is a hell of an achievement. If the game is as great as advertised, then I’ll take that as a sign that better days are coming.

We’re almost home, fellow football fans. As we wait for kickoff, here are some Sexy Sunday Thoughts to help pass the time. Enjoy!

“You know you watch a lot of porn when you can tell whether or not someone has bleached their anus.”

“A threesome can only go really wrong or really right.”

“Evolution ensures that not too many people can have a pathetic loser fetish.”

“Innovation is the mother of all invention, but it’s the cool aunt of sex toys.”

“People who take themselves too seriously are a lot less likely to be adventurous in bed.”

“The best hand job will never measure up to an average blow job.”

“A love/hate relationship will leave you as conflicted as a virgin porn star.”

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