Jack Fisher’s Sexy Sunday Thoughts: Sexy Tan Edition

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I love summer. I love going to the beach, eating outside, and hanging out by the pool. The long days, the hot weather, and the lack of precipitation that needs shoveling has always appealed to me. However, there’s one other aspect of summer for which I have mixed feelings and that involves tans.

Now, I’ll be the first to proclaim that I find tans sexy. Whether you’re a man or a woman, having a good tan is a great way to augment your sex appeal. I think that’s beyond dispute. Unfortunately, like any other natural endowment, not everyone can pursue that sex appeal with the same ease.

I’ve tried to get a tan before. It has never worked. I’m one of those guys whose skin doesn’t tan. It burns. Since I was a kid, I never managed to get a tan over the summer. Even when I smothered myself in sunscreen, I only ever ended up with a nasty burn that required a healthy round of Aloe Vera lotion.

It was frustrating, but that didn’t stop me from appreciating the sex appeal of tans. There are some people in my family who just tan naturally, especially around this time of year. They carry themselves with more swagger and rightfully so. They know they look good and will keep enjoying that look for the rest of the summer.

To those people, as well as those like me who still appreciate them, this round of my Sexy Sunday Thoughts is for you. I may be doomed to spend every summer bathing in sunscreen, but those who can get a tan should enjoy it. You don’t know how lucky you are.


“We send mixed messages when we’re so careful about protecting our genitals, yet still refer to them as our junk.”


“Breasts are nature’s way reminding men that they’re easily distracted.”


“The best lovemaking makes a bad day good and a good day great.”


“The difference between having sex and making love is akin to the difference between a home run on opening day and a grand slam in the World Series.”


“The fact that the human ass is inherently dirty and sexy makes it the perfect biological paradox.”


“What exactly was the first couple to have a tickle fight thinking?”


“If a man knows the entire starting lineup of his favorite football team, then he has no excuse for knowing how his lover’s genitals work.”


I hope this gives you some extra motivation while lounging out in the summer sun, working on that perfect bronze tan. If your skin can handle it, I say go for it. Summer is a great time to show off your sex appeal. A good tan is one of the few features that men and women alike can appreciate. It’s just one of the many things that make summer inherently awesome.

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