Tag Archives: X-men

What Jean Grey Of The X-men Can Teach Us About Life, Love, And Growing Up

These days, when most people read comics or watch movies, they do with an emphasis on escapism, spectacle, and an ability to talk/whine about it on message boards. Most people would rather not consume media with the idea that it has a bigger lesson to teach. We got plenty of those lessons in grade school and most of us got sick of that crap before we hit puberty.

However, there are occasions when a comic, movie, or TV show reveals something deeper about ourselves and our world that’s worth noting. I’m not talking about the kinds of crazy fan theories that claim Jack in “Titanic” never existed. It is possible for the media we consume to give us real, meaningful insights about ourselves.

That brings me back to comic books and X-men. Yes, this is going to be another one of those posts. After talking so much about the horrors of millennial life and the potential horrors of their children, I’m in need of a less serious topic. I think I’ve made clear that I love comics, I love X-men, and I’ll keep finding reasons to talk about them on this blog.

As it just so happens, a comic came out that conveys just such a lesson. It involves Jean Grey again. Other than Wonder Woman, she’s one of the most frequent topics of discussion on this blog. Considering she has a movie coming out next year, that’s likely to continue.

However, this comic has little to do with her movie and more to do with the themes of Jean Grey’s struggle. Some of them are relevant in the sense that they’re common to many major superheroes. Others are more subtle in that they have a bigger message to convey, one that applies to those who don’t have superpowers.

I doubt that the message that Marvel, a company owned by Disney, no less, intends to convey directly. Most of that message is indirect, but it can still function as a lesson, of sorts, that even aspiring erotica/romance writers like myself can appreciate.

The comic, in question, is Jean Grey #6. It’s the latest in a series that began earlier this year and focuses on the exploits of a teenage Jean Grey, who was plucked from the past several years ago in an event that has too many complications to go over without inducing migraines.

You don’t need to know too many of the particulars. You only need to know that she has a good reason for not liking her future. A lot of her adult life, as has played out in the X-men comics over the years, involves death, rebirth, and more dying at the hands of overwhelming power, often at the hands of the Phoenix Force.

Her teenage self is understandably frustrated with how that life played out. For the past several years, she’s gone to considerable lengths to change her fate, going so far as to ditch the X-men and try to be a normal teenage girl. As is often the case with superheroes, and teenagers in general, that doesn’t work. She still finds herself dragged back into the world of X-men and superheroes.

To her credit, she has handled herself fairly well. She’s managed to endure a space adventure with the Guardians of the Galaxy, go on trial for her future crimes that she’s yet to commit, and take part in a superhero civil war. It’s worth remembering, though, that she’s a teenager. She’s doing all this while also being one of the most powerful mutants in all of Marvel comics.

Her solo series, as written by a very talented writer named Dennis Hopeless, takes Jean Grey out of those roles with the X-men and sends her on a more personal journey. As I said before, her adult life is plagued by many complications that end up killing her. Chief among them, though, is the Phoenix Force. Pretty much all her frustrations begin and end with Phoenix Force.

She’s spent most of her time in the future just actively avoiding it or not thinking about it. In the very first issue of her solo series, though, she gets a message that makes clear she can’t ignore it anymore. Eventually, she has to prepare to confront the all-powerful Phoenix Force and all the problems/heartache it’ll cause her.

As part of that effort, she’s been seeking guidance from various sources throughout the Marvel universe. In a universe full of gods, aliens, and talking raccoons, there’s a lot to go around. Jean Grey #6 has her touch base with Dr. Strange. Those who saw Benedict Cumberbatch bring the charming sorcerer supreme to life last year shouldn’t be too surprised.

It actually starts off fairly similar to her previous efforts to seek guidance from more experienced Marvel heroes. Dr. Strange agrees to help her, which involves a little mystical mojo that should offend One Million Moms and amuse card-carrying Satanists. It’s here, though, where the journey and the lesson play out.

It’s a spirit quest, of sorts, one that takes the teenage Jean Grey through the life she seems doomed to live. It spans multiple eras of X-men comics, from the Stan Lee/Jack Kirby days of Uncanny X-men to her latest death in the early 2000s. What makes this journey a bit rockier, though, is that she’s not just a spectator.

These visions of her future self aren’t just there to remind her why her future sucks. They’re basically drills sergeants trying to hammer some hard lessons into her head that Jean, and teenagers in general, refuse to learn.

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It’s here where Jean starts to get a harsh lecture on having one persona that you have for all those around you while also having a very different, much less pleasant persona just under the surface. Like celebrities that are assholes when the camera isn’t rolling, some people have to pretend to be something they’re not.

With Jean Grey, one of the most powerful mutants on the planet, it’s even more difficult. Jean’s vision basically tells her what she refuses to admit. She makes herself out to be this quiet, upstanding young woman on a team of teenage boys. However, under the surface, she knows she’s more powerful than everyone else on her team and most other teams.

Her maintaining that facade is like trying to play chess with a brain-damaged monkey and trying to give the monkey a fair chance. As is the nature with mutant powers, she can’t turn them off. She can’t ever not be so powerful and frustrated. It’s a lesson that is hard for a teenage girl to wrap her head around, but easy for most adults who can’t stop being adults.

By now, it should be somewhat easier to see the real-life parallels here. We’re talking about overwhelming feelings that we can’t turn off, which tend to affect us greatly later in life. As teenagers, we don’t know how to deal with them or even how to make sense of them. They still affect us, though. We can try to ignore them all we want, but that doesn’t make them go away.

I’ll give the less kinky readers a moment to fill in the blanks. In the meantime, the life lessons in Jean Grey #6 get a lot harsher. As Dr. Strange guides her towards other moments in her life, she encounters a later version of herself that fans of the 90s X-men cartoon should recognize.

This is a version of Jean Grey who has put in the time, effort, and passion to endear herself to a lot of people. This is the woman that many of the other X-men see, or want to see, when they look at teenage Jean Grey. There’s a reason why Jean ranks among the most popular X-men characters of all time. The woman she becomes, which also happens to be a woman teen Jean resents, is just that endearing.

It’s a lot for anyone to live up to. Being a teenage girl, though, Jean isn’t going to just accept that this is the person she becomes. She knows that person still ends up dying. She knows that person still succumbs to the demons she can’t control, namely the Phoenix Force.

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It gets even harsher, though. As with every teenager, Jean Grey’s perspective is very limited. She hasn’t experienced enough of the world to understand what actually shapes someone into a functioning adult.

She, like many other teen heroes, have this idealized version of who they want to be and what life is like. It’s tragic, but inevitable that such idealism will eventually be shattered. That’s just the nature of life, in general. Ideals are for a perfect world and nobody, not even superheroes, live in a perfect world.

This is where the message becomes bigger than Jean Grey. It’s a message that can resonate with all teenagers. Her older self basically lays it out for her in a way so simple that even a teenage mind can process it. The life she thinks is doomed to tragedy and pain isn’t just a matter of rotten luck and crushing disappointment. It’s just life.

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It’s one of those messages that can apply to much more than superheroes and mutant powers. It can apply almost every teenager to some extent at some point in their lives. They’re just starting to learn what the world is like without the rose-colored glasses of childhood. They’re just starting to feel things that are strange, powerful, and make their pants feel tighter than they want. It’s not a tragedy. It’s just life.

It’s a lesson almost every teenager learns the hard way, regardless of whether or not they have mutant powers. I certainly did. I challenge anyone reading this comic, my novels, or this blog to say otherwise. The transition between childhood and adulthood is hard and it has to be hard because it’s such a harsh world.

On top of that, we have to enter that world with all these powerful feelings and emotions that kids just can’t process. This is where the Phoenix Force, the utter bane of Jean Grey’s life and many deaths, enters the picture.

In a sense, this cosmic space bird is a manifestation of the greatest extremes that we experience. In the comics, it’s a force that pushes Jean Grey’s powers over the edge and beyond. In life, it’s basically every overwhelming experience we’ve ever had, amplified to infinity.

When you’re a teenager, you’re full of all sorts of overwhelming feelings. As an adult, they’re still overwhelming, but you gain a sense of perspective. From our ability to love to our desire to make love, it’s a powerful force that shapes how we live and how we die. Being immature teenagers, and even immature adults, we often try to suppress it. Not only does that fail, but it can make everything worse.

Jean Grey, being a teenager, can’t wrap her head around those extremes, be they the Phoenix Force or just being a functional adult. Again, the visions of her older self basically have to belabor it, to the point of frustration.

In her vision, she starts to gain a better perspective of what these feelings are. She comes to see the Phoenix Force as more than just that big cosmic fire bird that ends up killing her twice. It’s not just a force for death. It’s also a force for life. Being a teenager, she can’t help but focus on the death. In doing so, she only ever obsesses over one extreme.

That’s understandable for a teenager who hasn’t lived enough of a life to make sense of it. It’s also the exact mentality that gets her killed. It’s why people who obsess over death tend to live in a state of near-constant distress. It affects them and those around them. By only focusing on one extreme, they basically doom themselves.

Jean Grey is in that exact position. She’s focused entirely on the end, but not on everything else around it. Teenagers, with their limited experiences, are like that and through no fault of their own. That’s why they’ll make such poor decisions, both in their adult lives and in their personal lives.

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This is where Jean Grey has her most defining moment of the comic, if not the past five years of X-men comics. Despite the benefit of foresight afforded to her by time travel and psychic abilities, she still refuses to confront the extremes of the Phoenix Force. She refuses to accept the person she becomes.

Finally, after all the belaboring and mystical-induced spirit quests, she does it. She finally takes a step back from the doom and gloom of her impending death. She finally looks at the bigger picture. She admits that who she is now and who she’s afraid of becoming are the same person. Those feelings that overwhelm her that she’s been trying to suppress are there and they’re not going away.

As an X-men fan and a fan of personal insight, it was one of the most satisfying moments I’ve reading an X-men comic that didn’t involve Emma Frost’s costume. It was one of those moments that felt much bigger than the character. It’s a powerful message that people without mutant powers can appreciate.

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Jean Grey’s struggles are very much akin to the struggles everyone faces when they have overwhelming experiences of any kind. Those experience don’t always have to have a sexual or personal connotation, but those are the ones that tend to stick out.

They’re also the experiences that teenagers, and even many adults, are likely to suppress. They’ll see certain experiences and desires as this powerful, dark force that will consume and destroy them, much like the Phoenix Force. However, it doesn’t have to be that way.

Just acknowledging that those feelings exist is an important step, especially for a teenager. There are people out there right now in societies and cultures that pressure them to repress desires that cannot be repressed. Like Jean and the Phoenix Force, those feelings eventually find us in the long run. If we refuse to confront them, then they can destroy us.

It’s a powerful lesson, especially for young people still making sense of their experiences. They may not have Jean Grey’s psychic abilities or the insight provided by time travel, but their future still seems every bit as daunting. It only becomes less daunting when you step back and realize that the overwhelming feelings we dread are just part of life, in general. We can’t always suppress them. Sometimes, we just have to embrace them.

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Filed under Comic Books, Jack Fisher, Superheroes, Jack Fisher's Insights, Marriage and Relationships

Lessons In Misguided (And Sincere) Love From An X-men Comic

Emma Frost

In general, I don’t always write these posts with a sense of timing in mind. My brain just doesn’t work that way. Usually, I get an idea, either through inspiration or just something that comes to me in the shower, and I just go with it. I find that to be the most effective means of exploring sexy and non-sexy issues alike on this blog.

Every now and then, I get lucky and fall ass-backwards into a perfectly timed topic. Sometimes, I even get obscenely lucky because that topic can relate to comics, which I love tying into sexy topics on this blog every chance I get. Well, whether by luck or outright fluke, I have a chance to link an issue I’ve been discussing lately directly to a comic book.

Trust me, I didn’t plan it. I didn’t expect it. I’m just going to run with it because it’s so relevant to the recent issues I’ve been exploring. It also involves X-men, which I go out of my way to talk about every chance I get, and a very particular character that I’ve mentioned before named Emma Frost. In case you need a reminder, this is Emma Frost.

I’m assuming I have your attention now, especially if you’re a heterosexual man or a homosexual woman with functioning genitals. I swear that pic isn’t some juvenile fan art, like the ones that drew big tits on Flintstones characters. That’s how Emma Frost actually dresses in the X-men comics. Can you now see why I’m so fond of them?

Sadly, I’m not writing this to talk about Emma Frost’s overtly sexy costumes. I’m writing this because recent events in the X-men comics tie directly into what I’ve been discussing with respect to conditioning our brains for love. While it’s an issue we’ll probably have to address once we start hacking our brain’s wiring, it’s something that comic book characters deal with regularly.

I’ve already mentioned how Carol “Captain Marvel” Danvers dealt with it during her early history. I’ve also cited past stories involving mind control, including one infamous story in Action Comics where Superman was brainwashed into making a porno tape with Big Barda. It’s one of those odd, but disturbing kinks that’s unique to worlds filled with psychics, aliens, and talking raccoons with machine guns.

However, this is one instance where a story about the mental manipulation of emotions and/or horniness isn’t quite as disturbing. If anything, it’s tragic in that reveals a lot about what some people are willing to do in the name of love.

To understand that tragedy, it’s necessary to understand the comic in question and the context behind it. The story unfolds in the pages of “X-men Blue #9” by Cullen Bunn, which is one of several ongoing X-men titles. This one focuses on the exploits of the time-displaced original five X-men, who are currently stuck in the future due to some time travel shenanigans that began back in 2012.

I’ll skip the part where I make a bunch of “Back To The Future” jokes and make clear that X-men Blue has much higher stakes compared to other X-men comics. That’s because what happens to these five time-displaced X-men, who also happen to be teenagers, could potentially affect the entire history of the X-men, which has already been subject to the kinds of time travel upheavals that would make Doc Brown’s head explode.

That’s where Emma Frost comes in. She knows, as well as any X-men regular who has encountered time travelers, that influencing these time-displaced teenagers could alter how things play out in their future. That’s important to her because she has a good, albeit tragic, reason to want to change that outcome.

Shortly before the events of this issue, Emma Frost endured a terrible loss. In an ominously-named event called “Death of X,” her former lover, Cyclops, died in her arms. To make matters even worse, it was one of those rare situations where there was nothing she could’ve done to stop it.

This isn’t akin to Spider-Man not stopping the Green Goblin in time or Superman not being able to save Lois Lane. This is basically someone being in the wrong place at the wrong time for the right reasons. In a sense, it’s a lot more realistic than the deaths most superheroes endure. It comes out of nowhere and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop it.

However, Emma Frost isn’t the kind of person to just accept that kind of tragedy and move on. This is a woman who once watched an entire classroom of her students die in an outright mutant genocide. When tragedy hits her, she hits back and looks damn sexy while doing it.

Granted, she does tend hit harder than she needs to or ought to. It has made her a lot of enemies, even alienating some of her former allies. However, Emma Frost isn’t one of those characters who does what she does out of malice. She’s not the Red Skull, Thanos, or even Dr. Doom.

She does see herself as a hero. She carries herself as a hero and has been on the front lines of some major Marvel conflicts. She’s also not a sociopath. She is capable of great love, both for her students and for lovers like Cyclops. So when Cyclops died, it hit her very hard.

When hit with a loss that hard, who wouldn’t jump at the chance to undo it? Even if it means crossing certain lines and hurting others, isn’t that worth getting back the person you love?

That’s a question that a lot of heroes and non-hero’s alike might debate in a philosophy class or a message board. However, there’s no debate for Emma Frost. She sees an opportunity to get her lover back and she takes it. Specifically, she sets her sights on the time-displaced, teenage Cyclops who has yet to grow into the man she fell in love with.

Finally, in X-men Blue #9, she’s in a position to get what she wants. As part of an ongoing event called “Secret Empire,” an event that’s hitting every major Marvel series, she abducts the time-displaced X-men and singles Cyclops out for some special treatment. Trust me, it’s nowhere near as sexy as it sounds.

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Emma basically does exactly what I described in my post about managing the future of brain hacking. She tires to twist and contort young Cyclops’ mind into being the man she once loved. She knows it may ruin the timeline. I’m sure Doc Brown would scream at the top of his lungs to get her to stop. It would still do no good.

That’s because Emma wants her lover back. She wants the man who has helped save the mutant race on more than one occasion. She’s willing to risk a time paradox and undermining the free will of someone who made clear in the issue that he doesn’t care for her. She’s just that desperate to get the man she loves back.

I won’t spoil how the book ends. I’d much rather people go out and read X-men Blue #9 because it’s a great comic that’s worth supporting. I’ll just say that the tragedy surrounding Emma Frost and her misguided efforts to subvert that tragedy really strike a chord.

It’s a tragic, but potentially prophetic story that may become more relevant over time. There’s no doubt that Emma Frost’s love for Cyclops in X-men Blue #9 is sincere. It’s not part of an agenda or some elaborate trick. It’s real, honest love that got destroyed through forces nobody could’ve foreseen.

Who’s to say that someone wouldn’t do something similar if they were in her position? I’ve said before in other posts that love is a powerful drug. It’s medically proven that love affects our brains like a drug. Compared to love, crack is watered-down diet soda.

Emma Frost is a powerful telepath, one of the most powerful in the Marvel universe, in fact. That means she can manipulate minds, twist thoughts, and conjure emotions in others. It does have limits, but it’s not that different from the kind of brain hacking that is in development as we speak.

What happens in the future when someone loses a loved one and refuses to accept it? What happens when someone just can’t stand the idea that someone they once loved no longer loves them? If there exists technology that could conjure or recapture that feeling, who wouldn’t be tempted to exploit it?

Our desire to love and be loved is a core, emotional need that every non-sociopath human feels. We don’t have the technology of Neuralink or the telepathy of Emma Frost to force it when we can’t have it. However, once it becomes possible, how long will it be before someone tries it?

Emma Frost didn’t need much temptation in X-men Blue #9. She just needed an opportunity and a plan. Again, it’s wrong to call it an evil plan. She was just trying to get back the man she loved and was willing to cross lines to do it. Love makes us do a lot of crazy, stupid things. What Emma Frost does in this comic is as much a lesson as it is a warning, albeit the sexy kind.

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Lessons In Fate, Power, And Passion (From An X-men Comic)

Generations: Phoenix & Jean Grey (2017) #1

As kids, it seems as though everyone is trying to teach us morality lessons that’ll help us grow into functioning adults. Those lessons aren’t always effective, though. Just ask the potheads who sat through the DARE program in school.

As adults, we tend to pay less attention to those kinds of lessons because we arrogantly believe we’ve figured it out. We think we know enough about the human experience to determine what is right and what is wrong. People who think that way tend to be the arrogant assholes who refuse to admit that Dr. Oz is a quack and a fraud.

Truly functional people, be they kids, adults, or adults who still act like kids, never stop learning important life lessons. Life is a constantly changing, obstacle-filled struggle where you never see the finish line and are guaranteed to fall flat on your face at least once a week. That’s why lessons that really deliver a powerful message in a compelling way is a special, precious thing in this chaotic world we live in.

That brings me to comic books, superheroes, and the X-men. Yes, this is going to be another one of those posts. Yes, that means I’m about to extrapolate a major philosophical insight into the human condition from an X-men comic, most likely in a way that applies to love, sex, and everything in between. You’re welcome.

It’s not the first time I’ve gleaned such lessons from an X-men comic. A year ago, I singled out X-men 92 #5 as a testament to just how powerful a romance between equals can be. Chances are, I’ll single out more comics in the future and there’s a high possibility that they’ll involve the X-men, Deadpool, or Wonder Woman.

The comic in question today is Marvel Generations: Phoenix & Jean Grey #1. It’s actually not part of any ongoing X-men series. It’s a single, self-contained story that’s part of an major promotional effort by Marvel called Marvel Generations.

The goal is as simple. Marvel seeks to bridge the gap between its older incarnations of iconic characters with the newer versions. While some of those newer versions have already caused controversy, the goal is always the same. Marvel hopes to appeal to their long-time fans while appealing to newer fans who are just getting into the world of Marvel.

Comic companies do this fairly often, trying to please old fans while creating new ones. Having followed comics for a good chunk of my life, I’ve seen more than my share of efforts. DC Comics, Marvel’s chief rival, did it last year with their DC Rebirth initiative. By most accounts, it was a success. Now, Marvel is attempting to achieve similar success.

There are many challenges to that effort, but for Jean Grey of the X-men, those challenges are more daunting than most. I’m not talking about the kind of daunting that involves dragons, killer robots, and Brett Ratner movies. I’m talking about convoluted complications involving time travel, evil clones, and cosmic forces. Trust me, it’s way more complicated than it sounds.

For this particular issue, though, you don’t need to know the fine print of those complications. You only need to know that Jean Grey’s story, after 50 years of X-men comics, got so crazy that one of her teammates, Beast, traveled back and time and brought her and the rest of the original five X-men to the future.

Now, since 2012, Jean Grey has basically been Marty McFly from “Back To The Future,” minus the incest sub-plot. She knows that her future sucks in that she ends up dead, and multiple times, no less. On top of that, she finds out she’s destined to become corrupted by a cosmic power known as the Phoenix Force, which will go onto cause all sorts of headaches, heartbreaks, and overall frustration.

That destiny is a huge part of the X-men mythos. That’s the part that “X-men: Dark Phoenix,” a movie I’ve talked about extensively, is going to try and capture. In this comic, Jean Grey has already read the spoilers to that story. She knows it doesn’t turn out well.

In fact, she has an ongoing solo series where the primary theme involves her preparing herself to face the Phoenix Force so that she doesn’t become that cute redheaded mutant who constantly dies and ends up on the wrong side of a bad love triangle. That’s entirely understandable and Marvel Generations: Phoenix & Jean Grey #1 gives her the best opportunity she’s had to date to change her fate.

This is where the lesson that Marty McFly learned the hard way comes in. Through elaborate space-time machinations that would give Doc Brown a migraine, Jean Grey is transported to a critical moment in the history of her character. It’s a moment that puts her in a position to change a lot more than just her fate.

That’s because she’s plopped in the middle of the iconic Phoenix Saga, also known by fans as the greatest X-men story ever told. It’s after her older self gains the cosmic power of the Phoenix force, but before it corrupts her in a way that destroys an entire star system and dooms her to a life of death and resurrection. There’s no part of that last sentence that’s exaggerated.

It’s an understandably confusing situation, but it’s one that puts Jean Grey in a position that even Marty McFly never dealt with. She doesn’t just have a chance to change her fate or learn more about her older self, who she’s only really known through the memories of other X-men. She has a chance to learn more about the cosmic power that she knows will doom her.

It makes for a series of colorful interactions between her and her older self that will bring tears of joy to the eyes of X-men fans of any generation. It’s hopeful, sincere, dramatic, and impactful. It fits perfectly within the narrative of Jean’s ongoing story in other X-men comics, as well as the story of her past self.

There’s so much to love about this comic, but I’m not going to spoil the entire thing here. I’d much rather have people go out and buy the issue. It’s money well-spent. Even if you don’t know much about comics or only know the X-men through the movies, this comic will appeal to you.

Beyond that appeal, though, I want to highlight an important theme within this comic. It’s a theme that applies to stories beyond comics and is relevant to life, in general. It especially applies to matters of love, passion, and intimate connections, which are major topic of this blog and the novels I write.

Generations: Phoenix & Jean Grey (2017) #1

At the heart of Jean Grey’s struggle in Marvel Generations: Phoenix & Jean Grey #1 is a difficult decision that everybody who isn’t a psychotic dictator faces at some point in their lives. It has to do with having the power to effect a situation and choosing whether or not to exercise it.

In the comic, Jean Grey has a chance to tell her older self everything she knows about her fate. She could, in principle, warn her about how the events of the Phoenix Saga play out for her. As a result, she could ensure it turns out differently, preferably in a way that doesn’t leave her dead and subsequently cloned.

On the surface, it seems easy. We saw what Marty McFly chose. We saw what the entire cast of “Hot Tub Time Machine” chose. They chose the easiest, most obvious path. They understandably wanted to improve their situation. In doing so, they created a lot more problems that they had to solve. The stakes for Jean’s problems, though, are much higher.

The problems she could create by changing her fate might be far worse than simply ending up dead. She’s not dealing with incestuous infatuations here. She’s dealing with a cosmic force that eats entire stars just for the fun of it.

She already knows the consequences of not changing anything. That has been hard enough to deal with. However, she has no idea whether she’ll fix anything by choosing otherwise. Given the Phoenix Force’s mixed track record, the odds are not in her favor.

I won’t spoil the choice she makes or what goes into. Again, I’d rather people read this comic to appreciate the full weight of its message. I’ll just say that the decision Jean makes is one that we all indirectly make when we have any kind of power over someone and can affect the course of their life.

Whether you’re a parent, a spouse, or an authority figure of any kind, you have an ability to make choices that affect other peoples’ fate. This is especially true when you’re in a relationship with someone. Your love for them and their love for you effectively links your fate. That makes your ability to make the right choices for the right reasons so critical.

It happens all too often, people using their position of power over others to abuse them. We see it when police harass minorities. We see it in crimes of passion. We see it in cases of spousal abuse and child abuse. When someone else trusts us with authority, we impact their lives in so many ways, often in ways we can’t see.

It can bring out the best and the worst in people, as the Phoenix Saga famously demonstrated. Real life demonstrates it too. Power does corrupt people. Sometimes the hardest choice to make is to not exercise that power to avert the potential consequences it might incur. It’s a choice that a lot of crazy dictators fail to make.

It’s a choice ordinary people fail to make as well. Parents find this out the hard way when they try to make decisions for their children. Sure, it seems like the right thing to do at the time. They may see it as them just protecting their child, as every parent should. However, they don’t realize until it’s too late how much damage that can do.

When you’re in an intimate relationship with someone, it can be just as powerful. If someone loves you implicitly and is willing to trust you so completely, you have the power to guide their lives in profound ways. That guidance, though, can be detrimental to the both of you.

When you have the power to influence a person or a situation, it’s easy and tempting to bend it to what you think will be more beneficial. The problem is that, without the benefit of hindsight, it’s impossible to know whether you’ll actually make things better or much worse.

The hardest decision in that situation is to acknowledge the problems as you understand them, bear the burden of solving them, and focus on the future rather than agonizing over the past. It’s rarely a preferable decision because it means accepting a situation and your role in it. It may feel like a missed opportunity, but it can just as easily be an averted crisis. Hindsight may be painfully clear, but possibilities are painfully vague.

Jean Grey, who is a teenager, mind you, in the story that plays out in Marvel Generations: Phoenix & Jean Grey #1, has to make this decision in the face of impossibly high stakes. What she does is a testament to the kind of character she is and the values we cherish in our heroes.

It’s a short, but powerful story that teaches an important lesson to children, adults, comic fans, and non-comic fans alike. Whether you’re a comic book character, a celebrity, an authority figure, or just someone with the slightest bit of leverage over someone, it’s a lesson worth learning.

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A Dr. Doom Movie Has Been Announced (And It May Already Be Doomed)

This past weekend was a magical weekend for comic book fans, like myself. It was the four-day, fanboy and fangirl orgy known as the San Diego Comic Con. For comic book fans, it is the perfect combination of Christmas, Halloween, and Mardi Gras, all rolled into one. To say it’s kind of a big deal would be like saying boobs are kind of awesome.

I’ve been to comic book conventions before. I’ve talked about my experience and given advice on how to maximize the experience. I’m a regular attendee of the New York Comic Con, which is essentially the low-calorie version of the San Diego Comic Con. It’s still awesome, but if you want to be on the front lines of the greatest spectacle in all of comic book fandom, you go to San Diego.

One of the things at the very top of my bucket list, right up there with getting a kiss from Jennifer Lawrence, is to attend the San Diego Comic Con one year. I haven’t been out there yet, but I’m hoping that if my novels are successful enough, I’ll be able to buy myself some VIP passes and spend four days taking in the glorious spectacle.

I may very well meet my future wife there. Chances are, she’ll be dressed as Wonder Woman, Jean Grey, or Starfire. I don’t know what I’ll be wearing, but I hope it’s something that wins their heart.

Until that day comes, I’ll settle for watching news feeds and live-streaming. I spent a good four days effectively glued to my phone or anything with an internet connection, taking in every bit of news, sexy and otherwise. There’s always so much to take in. Some of it involves comics. Some of it involves movies. Some of it just involves celebrities dressing up in crazy shit to get a laugh.

This past weekend, though, there was one bit of news that really stood out. For an event that involves a lot of women dressed up as Sailor Moon characters, that’s saying something. As it just so happens, it involves someone that I’ve been talking about a lot lately, Dr. Doom.

I don’t know if this is the universe trying to tell me something. I don’t know if Fox secretly hacked my brain or some intern just read my blog on a coffee break. Maybe it’s just one big coincidence and my caveman brain has convinced me these internet ramblings are more influential than they could possibly be.

Whatever the case, the news got everyone buzzing and not necessarily in a good way. Fox, despite their craptacular failures in all things Fantastic Four related, are developing a Dr. Doom movie.

Den of Geek: Dr. Doom Movie In Development

Now, this is big news to comic fans. The idea that Fox would do anything involving the Fantastic Four should be enough to induce a migraine in anyone who thinks the world already has too many shitty movies. I’ve joked about it before, but for comic fans, this is no joke.

To date, Fox’s track record with Fantastic Four movies sucks. There’s just no nice way to say it. They have butchered, bungled, and failed so miserably that they’ve become a case study, of sorts, in how not to do a superhero movie. If you’re not sure whether or not the movie you’re making sucks, just go watch 2015’s “Fantastic Four.” If what you’re doing is too similar, then you’ve fucked up.

As frustrating as Fox’s history with the Fantastic Four is, it’s also completely understandable as to why they’d want to make a movie like this. Unlike the Marvel Cinematic Universe or any movie in DC’s movie universe, Fox can’t just take it’s time and be careful with a Fantastic Four movie. They can’t even wait for fans to forget about their previous failures.

That’s because, due to a legal clusterfuck that goes all the way back to the early 90s, Fox has to keep making Fantastic Four movies or they lose the rights. It doesn’t matter how awful they are. It doesn’t even matter whether or not they release it. They have to make these movies or Marvel and their Disney overlords get the rights back and Fox gets nothing.

It already happened once before. Fox tried and failed to turn Daredevil into a movie franchise. All they did was give Ben Affleck a better understanding on how to eventually become Batman.

By failing to continue that franchise, the rights lapsed back to Marvel and they immediately showed up Fox by creating a critically-acclaimed Netflix series. I’ve seen it. The first 10 minutes of the first episode is more entertaining than the entire “Daredevil” movie.

That’s why Fox needs to keep doing something with the Fantastic Four. Otherwise, they’ll have to sit back and watch as Marvel humiliates them again by succeeding where they failed on multiple occasions. Given all the egos in Hollywood, it’s totally understandable that they’d keep throwing good money at bad just to avoid that kind of pwning.

Now, if it sounds like I’m being overly pessimistic about a movie that may or may not even get made, I apologize. I hope I’ve made clear in previous posts that I’m as passionate about my comics as I am about sleeping naked. Dr. Doom is one of my favorite characters and, by a wide margin, one of my favorite comic book villain.

Fox has had multiple chances to make Dr. Doom the alpha and omega of villainy. First, they tried making him some charming, egotistical sweet-talker using the guy who played the asshole from “Nip/Tuck.” Then, they tried making him some disgruntled blogger. From a comic fan’s perspective, that’s akin to making chocolate fudge taste like dried horse shit.

Fox clearly doesn’t have a damn clue on who Dr. Doom is and how to capture what makes him so iconic. It’s not like they don’t have suitable reference materials. There’s an entire series called “Books of Doom” that show how Dr. Doom came to be. There are also cartoons that do, in a few minutes, what Fox couldn’t do with two movies.

Now, after all their failures, they still want to make a Dr. Doom movie? Not only would that give them yet another opportunity to undermine the greatest comic book villain of all time. It would also ensure that Dr. Doom never finds his way to the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Given how big a menace he’s been to pretty much every Marvel hero, that’s just tragic.

It’s hard to say just how serious Fox is with this. This is the same company that tried everything it could to stop the “Deadpool” movie and has been dragging its feet on a “Gambit” movie. However, they have way too many reasons not to pursue this.

It’s not just that Dr. Doom is one of the most iconic villains of all time. It’s not even that they’ve botched him horribly through multiple movies. We’re currently living in an era where villains are starting to gain just as much prominence as heroes.

The success of TV shows like “Breaking Bad” and the success of movies like “Suicide Squad” show that there is a market for a villain. I’ve talked about the heroes journey and the villains journey. Few could walk the villain’s journey better than Dr. Doom. At a time when people are turning to villains to fix problems, this may very well just be the best possible time for Dr. Doom to get a movie.

Unfortunately, it’ll still be Fox that makes that movie. Their track record leaves a lot to be desired. Despite this, there are some signs that they aren’t just trying to cling to the movie rights by throwing a couple million dollars at Roger Corman. They’re putting Noah Hawley, the man who made “Legion” a successful show this year, on the job. He’s got credentials, far more than Josh Trank ever did.

That said, I doubt you’ll find many comic fans who are excited about the prospect of Fox doing anything Fantastic Four related. Even fewer fans will have faith that Fox can get Dr. Doom right. They thought turning Doom into a disgruntled blogger was a good idea. What hope does this movie truly have?

I’m going to keep an eye on this so expect me to talk about this again, as I do with many topics involving superhero movies. Until then, here’s a quick fan film I found does with an $11,000 budget what Fox couldn’t do with millions. It shows that, villain or not, Dr. Doom is a character who deserves better.

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Wonder Woman Exceeds Deadpool At The Box Office (And Deadpool Is Okay With That)

I talk about movies fairly frequently on this blog, especially the sexy kind. Sometimes I talk about the sex appeal they have in the present. Sometimes I explore the potential for sex appeal in the future. When it comes to specific movies though, the two I’ve discussed most are “Deadpool” and “Wonder Woman.”

The reasons for this should be obvious. They’re both awesome movies with an insane amount of sex appeal. One of them has the most iconic female hero of the past century coming to life in her first, big-budget solo movie. The other has a naked Ryan Reynolds. It’s hard to get more awesome and sexy than that.

Recently, though, both movies made the news in a wonderfully fitting way. First, the “Wonder Woman” box office total achieved a milestone, raking in $373 million domestically. That puts it beyond the $363 million that “Deadpool” pulled in. While “Wonder Woman” still hasn’t matched the international total for “Deadpool,” it’s closing the gap fast and has a good chance of matching it.

Now, that’s not to say both movies are entirely on an equal footing. Remember, “Deadpool” was a bloody, R-rated poop joke that included Ryan Reynolds getting naked and enough F-bombs to make a Mormon faint. It managed to rake in nearly $800 million worldwide despite this rating, not being released in China, and on a paltry $58 million budget.

That’s not to undermine the accomplishments of “Wonder Woman” in any way. This movie, despite having nearly three times the budget, was made for $100 million less than “Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice” and still managed to make more domestically.

In addition, Gal Gadot did not have the same profile as Ryan Reynolds did when he made Deadpool. Other than her role in “Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice,” she hadn’t established herself as a draw like Reynolds did. She also accomplished all this with a female director in Patty Jenkins, who had proven herself in TV, but not in movies.

For “Wonder Woman,” a female superhero starring in her own movie after “Catwoman” nearly killed the genre, that’s still a hell of an accomplishment. Deadpool actor, Ryan Reynolds, understands this as well as anyone who has been following superhero movies for the past two decades. Being the awesome, formerly sexiest man alive that he is, he even responded.

 

The Merc May Be Filthier, but Her B.O. is Stronger. Congrats #WonderWoman #BoxOfficeBoss

A post shared by Ryan Reynolds (@vancityreynolds) on

That’s right. In the spirit of good sportsmanship and dirty jokes about body odor, Reynolds congratulated “Wonder Woman” for accomplishing so much. In such a highly competitive, cocaine-fueled world, that just warms my heart.

Gal Gadot, being badass beauty that brought Wonder Woman to life, responded as well on Twitter. True to the heart of her character, she acknowledges and accepts the loving sentiment of others, regardless of whether they’re male, female, or used to be married to Scarlett Johanssen.

After talking about such dire topics like fascism on this blog, this really made my week. As a fan of superhero movies and people being decent to each other, it just put a smile on my face in the best possible way.

Deadpool and Wonder Woman may be two characters owned by different companies. They may be very different in how they operate, what they stand for, and how they go about making awesome movies. However, for them to unite in the spirit of making awesome superhero movies is just too fitting.

Excuse me. I just teared up a little.

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X-men Dark Phoenix Update: New Directors, Alien Princesses, And Concerns

I was going to talk about a more pressing topic today. Then, some news and tidbits about the upcoming “X-men: Dark Phoenix” movie hit the web and I immediately updated my priorities.

For those of you who rely on this blog for sexy thoughts and updates on bionic penises, I ask that you sit tight. Also, I’m not apologizing because I think I’ve made it pretty clear that I’m a huge comic book fan and an ardent X-men fan. When there’s big news about both, it’s going to get my attention and I’m going to talk about it. That’s all there is to it.

At this very moment, “X-men: Dark Phoenix” is beginning production. The first images from the movie set have leaked and James McAvoy, who plays Charles Xavier, has teased the prospect of shaving his head again. As a comic book fan and a Marvel fan, I couldn’t be more excited about this without Jennifer Lawrence begin naked. Then again, with the X-men movies, that may be a moot point.

As excited as I am to see this movie come to life without someone going on a cocaine bender, there has been some recent news that’s worth mentioning and it does have some important implications for “X-men: Dark Phoenix” and the future of the X-men a movie franchise.

I’ll probably end up saying this more than a few times between now and next year, but “X-men: Dark Phoenix” is the most important X-men movie ever made. It’s not just that Fox has to keep making X-men movies in order to keep the movie rights from reverting back to Marvel/Disney, which happened with Daredevil. This movie is both a foundation for the future of the X-men, as well as an act of redemption.

That leads me to the first major bit of news that came out recently. Unlike “X-men: Apocalypse,” Bryan Singer won’t be directing this movie. Instead, “X-men: Dark Phoenix” will be directed by long-time X-men producer, Simon Kinberg.

This move seems amicable. Bryan Singer even went so far as to formally pass the torch on Instagram. The fact it was so amicable in an industry town built on cocaine, blowjobs, and exploiting child stars is a positive sign. It also helps that Kinberg and Singer have been working together since “X-men: First Class.” That means will be a sense of continuity, so to speak.

This is already a big deal for anyone who had their heart, soul, and balls crushed by the massive wet fart that was “X-men: The Last Stand.” That movie was mired in controversy before it even began production because Bryan Singer left the franchise to direct “Superman Returns.” That move left X-men fans with Brett “Rush Hour” Ratner. In hindsight, nobody won that exchange.

There’s another important element to highlight with Simon Kinberg directing this movie. As I pointed out in my instructions on how to not to screw up “X-men: Dark Phoenix,” Kinberg showed a bit of humility that’s rare for Hollywood these days. He apologized for the role he played in “X-men: The Last Stand” and vowed to do better if he got a second chance.

Well, that chance has arrived for Mr. Kinberg. On paper, he’s the best man for the job because he has a huge personal investment in this movie. He understands that he botched the Phoenix Saga when he tried to force it into “X-men: The Last Stand” as half-baked side-plot. He also understands why that was a big problem and a huge taint on his credibility with X-men fans.

As director of “X-men: Dark Phoenix,” he can do more than just get the Phoenix Saga right the second time around. He can be more than the man who not just atoned for the cinematic migraine that was “X-men: The Last Stand.” He can be the man who brought the greatest X-men story of all time to life and made it awesome. That’s a hell of a legacy, one that will surely get him laid by X-men fans for the rest of his life.

He has no excuses and all the resources. Unlike the last craptacular attempt in “X-men: The Last Stand,” this movie has every cast member returning, including Jennifer Lawrence and Michael Fassbender. The younger cast, led by Sophie Turner’s Jean Grey and Tye Sherridan’s Cyclops, is all under contract. None has jumped ship for a DC movie. If you don’t think that’s a big deal, just look up James Mardsen.

Mr. Kinberg may even be getting an extra boost with that cast because another bit of important news dropped recently. According to Deadline, Jessica Chastain is in talks to join the cast of the movie. Other than her inherent sex appeal, her role actually has some vital implications for this movie, as well as some uneasy concerns.

That’s because Ms. Chastain is in line to play a well-known X-men character named Lilandra. In the context of the Phoenix Saga, as well as the X-men as a movie franchise, that’s a big deal because Lilandra isn’t just any ordinary supporting character for the X-men. She’s the empress of a race of warring, bird-like race of aliens called the Shi’ar.

If that sounds like a lot of WTF to inject into a movie franchise that already has problems staying grounded, thanks largely to conflicting timelines, then calm down. There is at least some method to the madness and trust me, there’s still plenty of WTF to go around.

The casting of Lilandra is huge for the X-men franchise and for “X-men: Dark Phoenix” because in the original comics, she plays a critical role. In fact, it’s not unreasonable to say that she’s a big reason why the original Phoenix Saga became the dramatic, heart-wrenching story that still gives X-men fans wet panties to this day.

The Phoenix Force, at least in the comics, has a very cosmic origin. It has roots in an elaborate space mythos that would make the Church of Scientology envious. “X-men: The Last Stand” captured precisely none of that. Instead, it built the Phoenix around the idea of Jean Grey going crazy and Famke Janssen looking deadpanned every other frame. It’s even less exciting than it sounds.

This development with Lilandra is big because it means “X-men: Dark Phoenix” is going to try to follow the comics a bit closer. It also means that the X-men may have a very different enemy to face this time. After over a half-dozen movies of clashing with Magneto, it’s something the X-men movies need.

In fact, when I made my list of ways to not screw up “X-men: Dark Phoenix,” I highlighted the need for better enemies as one of the critical reasons. I cited a character named Mr. Sinister in that article. While he would be a huge draw in any X-men movie, especially if Bryan Cranston played him, he does have one shortcoming. He played no significant role in the Phoenix Saga.

With the casting of Lilandra, “X-men: Dark Phoenix” checks more than a few boxes and I’m not just talking about those involving X-men fans. Lilandra may have been a quasi-villain in the original Phoenix Saga, but she’s no Rita Repulsa. She’s no Disney Princess either.

She’s a tough, driven, hard-nosed ruler who will make hard decisions and not shed a goddamn tear about it. At a time when Wonder Woman has proven that there’s a market for badass female heroes, Lilandra can show that there’s also a market for complex female villains.

That’s a big deal in an era where Hollywood is trying to cater to more than just young men with a functioning penis. Everyone is trying, and failing at times, to create strong female characters. They’ve finally got a major success with “Wonder Woman.” Lilandra can be a success on the other end of that equation, but as a villain.

That’s going to be even more challenging because the margin for error for female characters is much smaller. We’re used to seeing flawed male characters screw up, step up, and everything in between. We’re not as used to seeing female characters do the same because if it’s messed up, people get accused of misogyny and sexism. It’s part of what video game critics have dubbed the “Galbrush Paradox.”

Having a character like Lilandra, along with the star power of Jessica Chastain, can break new ground for the X-men movies and for female characters in movies as a whole. However, with such a small margin for error, there is a distinct possibility that messing up this part will derail the movie.

Keep in mind, this is also a movie that has Sophie “Sansa Stark” Turner front and center. Her profile is rising fast and catching up to Jennifer Lawrence, probably more so than she’d ever admit. As Jean Grey, one of the founding members of the X-men and one of the most powerful female heroes in Marvel, there will be a lot of girl power in “X-men: Dark Phoenix.”

Image result for sophie turner jean grey gif

If it works, then it’ll be a boon for female superheroes on par with “Wonder Woman.” If not, we may end up with another “Catwoman” scenario that sets both the X-men franchise and the genre of superhero movies back another decade. As an X-men fan, I don’t want to see neither.

While I’m thrilled that Mr. Kinberg is going out of his way to capture the core elements of the Phoenix Saga for “X-men: Dark Phoenix,” I’m also worried that he’s not giving this movie a lot of flexibility. Just having great female characters and a great female villain just isn’t enough. Just ask “Power Rangers.” The story and drama has to work.

The cost of failure will be even higher this time around and not just for Mr. Kinberg. Failing to do justice on the most iconic X-men story of all time won’t just put him on the same level as Joel Shumacher. He’ll be responsible for failing to do justice to a strong female character in Jean Grey who, until “X-men: Apocalypse,” was nothing more than a pretty face for Wolverine to whine about.

I want to believe that Mr. Kinberg learned his lessons after “X-men: The Last Stand,” but that might not be enough for this movie. The cast is already pretty bloated and will likely juggle a lot of side-plots, which was one of the criticisms of “X-men: Apocalypse.” Adding aliens and cosmic forces to the mix is sure to complicate that.

Even with complications, “X-men: Dark Phoenix” has the potential to lay the foundation for the X-men franchise for the decade. By opening up the X-men’s more cosmic side, which includes space pirates and terrifying alien bugs that would give Ridley Scott nightmares, there could be a whole host of new movies for the X-men to pursue.

Again, a lot of that hinges on the success or non-total failure of “X-men: Dark Phoenix.” One movie can kill a franchise. Just ask the Fantastic Four. Mr. Kinberg was involved in that, which is another major concern, but he was not nearly as much at fault for that bombastic failure as he was “X-men: The Last Stand.” Despite this, I’m sure he’d like to make “X-men: Dark Phoenix” a high point for his career.

For now, these are my primary concerns and while some may end up being alleviated, others might emerge. Whatever the case, expect me to keep a close eye on developments involving “X-men: Dark Phoenix.” Between the stakes for X-men fans and the future of female characters, this movie is a huge deal in more ways than even Mr. Kinberg probably thinks.

In the meantime, I’ll keep myself busy with sexy stories and news about sex robots. For other X-men fans, here’s a fan trailer of the Dark Phoenix Saga using clips from the classic X-men 90s cartoon. It’s not much, but it should tide X-men fans over until the first trailer comes out.

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How To NOT Screw Up The Deadpool Cartoon

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I thought about doing a post on this sooner. Fortunately or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it, I got so caught up in talking about the prospect of a second sexual revolution that it kind of slipped my mind. For a subject that involves Deadpool, superhero comics, and a large potential for toilet humor, that’s quite a feat.

Then, as I gave it more thought, it became clear that this was something I had to do. I just couldn’t call myself a fan or an aspiring writer if I just let something like this fall to the wayside. I already set the precedent by doing it with “X-men Dark Phoenix.” Now, I’m doing it with Deadpool. Okay, that came out wrong…or did it? Sorry, I just couldn’t resist.

As I mentioned earlier this week, with a huge grin on my face and a boner in my pants, Deadpool is getting his own cartoon in 2018. After crushing any and all expectations at the box office, raking in $783 million despite an R-rating and a lot of dick jokes, how could Fox resist? That kind of money will be a lot of chimichangas.

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Deadpool will be joining FXX, a network that airs shows and cartoons that are distinctly not Disney. With shows like “Archer” and “The Americans,” this is a network that would’ve made Walt Disney faint, but he’d probably still watch. I’ve yet to meet anyone who can’t get some entertainment value out of “The Americans.”

It’s a network that isn’t afraid of raunchy humor and that’s a good thing too because Deadpool is nothing but raunchy. This is a man who tried to have sex with a female incarnation of death and flirts with Spider-Man. There’s just no way a guy like him could operate under Disney’s kid-friendly policies.

By all accounts, Deadpool has everything going for him. He has a successful movie, a fitting network, and Ryan Reynolds’ sex appeal. He couldn’t be in a better position without being in a hot tub at the Playboy Mansion. Even so, I’m not going to assume too much. Fox still has a mixed legacy when it comes to maximizing the X-men’s potential. I don’t want to keep reminding them of “Wolverine Origins,” but I will if I have to.

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In that spirit, I’m going to do for the Deadpool cartoon what I did for the upcoming “X-men: Dark Phoenix” movie. Namely, I’m going to make a short list of how to ensure this cartoon doesn’t suck.

Don’t get me wrong. I want this cartoon to be awesome. I want it to be every bit as awesome as the movie. However, I’ve learned through experience that establishing a floor is less frustrating than setting a high bar. By pointing out the pot-holes in a road, it’s easier to find your own path.

Deadpool, being the eccentric, walking poop joke that he is, can’t rely too heavily on guidance and standards. Between his style and his limited attention span, micromanaging might as well be his kryptonite. So with that in mind, here’s a short list of ways to not screw up the Deadpool cartoon.


Tip #1: Embrace Deadpool’s Crude Humor

This is actually a lesson Fox already learned the hard way. I know I said I didn’t want to keep reminding everyone of “Wolverine Origins,” but in this case it’s unavoidable. That movie had many problems, but the way it treated Deadpool, turning him into “Barakapool” as X-men fans call him, was at the top of the list.

While the movie was, at its core, a Wolverine movie, it completely robbed Deadpool of all his crazy quirks and crude humor. There were no dick jokes, gratuitous blood splatters, or inappropriate references to outdated pop culture memes. The movie tried way too hard to be PG-13 and that meant giving Deadpool the FCC treatment.

Naturally, it didn’t go over well. “Wolverine Origins” is widely regarded as the worst X-men movie of all time, so much so that Hugh Jackman almost quit the movie entirely. Conversely, “Deadpool” is widely praised as being the best X-men movie of all time and a big part of that success came from embracing Deadpool’s crude humor.

He’s quirky, erratic, crude, violent, and horny. He’s also fun, heroic, likable, and honorable when he needs to be. The movie captured all of these traits and didn’t give a damn if it meant an R-rating. It still worked beautifully and that’s what the cartoon needs to embody.


Tip #2: Craft Stories That Appeal To Adults (For The Most Part)

There was a time when comics, as a whole, were associated with kids. That time wasn’t too long ago either. When I was a kid, cartoons featuring comic characters were geared towards kids. The X-men, Spider-Man, Batman, and the Justice League were all branded as kids shows and that was their primary audience for the most part. Given the billions in merchandising these properties generate, that strategy clearly worked.

However, the kids who grew up loving those cartoons aren’t kids anymore. Their adults and the demographics have shifted considerably, creating large swaths of older consumers who seek more adult-themed material. With “My Little Pony” being the exception, the market is trending towards more adult stories.

At the moment, the comics featuring Deadpool and other major X-men characters are fairly mature. They aren’t exactly “Game of Thrones,” but they do address real-world issues that can make for some pretty iconic stories, some of which end up being big-budget blockbuster movies.

The cartoons, however, are not that mature. They’re the only part of the superhero marketing machine that hasn’t matured. There cartoons out there for Spider-Man and the Avengers, but they are so watered down and so censored in their plot that they’re unwatchable to any fan over the age of 7.

Deadpool can finally break that mold. Deadpool is already on a network that has adult cartoons like “Archer.” While Deadpool has shown up in other cartoons, he’s never been able to be his rude, crude self. This cartoon needs give him that chance. They need to let him joke about dicks, breasts, poop, and everything in between. That’s the only way to capture the true essence of Deadpool.


Tip #3: Keep The Cast Small And Stay Focused On Deadpool

This is an easy trap to fall into with any show, animated or otherwise. Every successful show needs a strong supporting cast. Sometimes, that cast can be pretty damn big. Just look at all the supporting characters “The Simpsons” have gained over the years.

Deadpool may be unique in his love of dick jokes and Mexican food, but he’s had a solid supporting cast throughout his history. Most notably, he’s been closely associated with other established X-men characters like Cable, as well as certain superhero teams like X-Force.

These are all elements that could fit into a cartoon more effectively than the movie. It was a running joke with the movie on how low the budget was. At $58 million, it cost $17 million less than the first X-men movie and that’s in 2000 dollars. It couldn’t have too large a cast because it just didn’t have the money.

As a result, the movie made every character count. With animation, however, there’s more flexibility. Fox could utilize even the most obscure X-men characters, like Doop. Given the sheer size of the X-men mythos, the temptation will definitely be there to throw in as many characters as possible into this cartoon.

Fox needs to resist that temptation as best it can. It needs to focus solely on Deadpool and only a handful of supporting characters. If the number of characters in the cast ever exceeds the number of fingers on both hands, then the cast is too bloated. This isn’t an X-men cartoon that focuses on a team. It’s a Deadpool cartoon that focuses on Deadpool. That should be a given, but it’s still worth belaboring.


Tip #4: Break The 4th Wall, But Don’t SHATTER It

It’s one of Deadpool’s most defining traits, more so than his iconic costume or love of tacos. He constantly breaks the fourth wall. For those of you who don’t know fancy Hollywood jargon, that means he talks to the audience. He knows he’s a comic book character. He understands he’s part of a show and he embraces it.

He did it in the movie on multiple occasions, but not in “Wolverine Origins.” The critical and box office reception of both should tell you everything you need to know about how important this is. It’s one of Deadpool’s most defining traits and any cartoon has to include that.

However, like any defining trait, it can be overdone. Like Spider-Man’s origin story, something can be done to death. It can even totally derail the story. The “Ultimate Spider-Man” cartoon did a lot of fourth wall breaking early on and it made the stories insufferable at times.

In the comics, Deadpool’s fourth wall breaking is only sprinkled in every now and then. It’s usually an aside, never seriously affecting the flow of the story. It’s usually just a good way to throw in some extra laughs. That’s the approach the cartoon should use. Let Deadpool be Deadpool. Let him break the fourth wall. Just don’t let him break it to the point where it undermines the story.


There you have it. Like my list for the Dark Phoenix movie, I’ve no expectations that anyone from Fox or Marvel will ever read this list, let alone take it seriously. This is just me, an aspiring erotica/romance writer and die-hard X-men fan, articulating my hopes and dreads.

Between this cartoon and “X-men: Dark Phoenix,” 2018 is going to be an exciting year for me. I hope it exceeds my expectations, but I’ll settle for it not sucking. These days, when there are way too many things that can go wrong behind the scenes, that’s probably the healthiest mindset to have. If I can draw inspiration from it all and craft some quality erotica/romance along the way, then that’ll just be extra hot sauce on the chimichangas.

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Filed under Comic Books, Jack Fisher, Superheroes