September 18, 2016 · 9:41 am

Jack Fisher’s Top 5 Simple Pleasures

I’d like to get less elaborate and less controversial for once. It’s Sunday. There’s football to watch, pizza to eat, and beer to drink. The fact that I can do all these things without my pants on is just a nice bonus. This is one of those days where you just sit back, put your feed up, and enjoy the simpler pleasures of life. With that in mind, I’d like to get a little personal again to cap off my weekend.

I’ve found that getting personal on this blog is a lot of fun. It may even be therapeutic. I’ve admitted that I sleep naked. I’ve admitted a great fondness for foreplay. I’ve even told a very personal story about my circumcision. I dare anyone to get more personal than that. This time, I don’t intend to get that personal. For a nice, warm Sunday afternoon, I’d like to reflect on those smaller, lesser known pleasures in life.

I admit it’s somewhat jarring for an aspiring erotica/romance writer. A great deal of my stories revolve around some of life’s most powerful and endearing pleasures like love, lust, and indulgence. These are themes we see in all sorts of literature, going all the way back to ancient mythology and epic poems. There’s a place for these sorts of stories, but there’s also a place for the pleasures that’ll never get their own epic.

With that in mind, here are Jack Fisher’s Top 5 Simple Pleasures for your Sunday Morning.

Number One: Sleeping In on a Rainy Morning

This is one of those underrated pleasures that feels like a confluence of luck. For one, you have to be in a position to actually sleep in. These days, that’s a challenge in and of itself. As Dennis Miller once put it, “The only reason we’re living longer is because we can’t fit death into our schedule.” Despite this, every now and then we find a day to sleep in and when that day comes on a rainy, dreary morning, it’s downright magic.

You see, it’s usually hard to sleep in when the sun is beaming in through your window, loudly proclaiming, “You don’t get to catch up on all the sleep you missed! I won’t let you! Mwhahahaha!” When it’s raining though, that proclamation is muted. Instead, you get the soothing sound of rain pounding against the window. It triggers this instinct to just curl up under the sheets, purr like a kitten, and sleep. It’s just special in ways that words cannot describe.

Number Two: The Feeling of a Freshly Shaven Face/Leg

Here’s one with a slight gender variation, but not a major one. I come from a long line of burly men with thick beards and wild hair. The men in my family kind of pride ourselves on that look. We take pride in our manly facial hair and how manly it looks. The problem is that if we don’t shave for a few weeks, we look like a creepy mountain man who just choked a bear.

So when I shave my face, that smooth feeling is very fleeting. Naturally, that makes the feeling all the more precious. I don’t know for sure that women feel the same way when they shave their legs, but I think that feeling of smooth skin appeals to everyone on some levels. We all like smooth things, whether it’s our coffee or our flesh. That makes it a feeling worth appreciating.

Number Three: Drinking Hot Chocolate and Wrapping Yourself In Warm Blankets on a Cold Winter Day

Ideally, there will come a day where I’ll be such a successful writer, that or I’ll become the personal gigolo to a rich woman, and I’ll retire to a tropical climate. I’m not a fan of winter. I’m not a fan of cold weather, shoveling snow, and not being able to sit on my porch with no shirt on. That said, winter does create opportunities for certain particular pleasures.

Warm blankets and hot chocolate are the alpha and omega of these feelings. I’ve had days where I’ve spent one too many hours in the blinding cold. I’m shivering. I’m sore. I’m in no condition to do anything. So I brew up some hot chocolate, get some extra blankets, and curl up in front of my TV. It’s a special feeling that warms me up in more than one way.

Number Four: A Satisfying Ending to a Book/Movie/Video Game You’ve Been Enjoying

Let’s face it. It’s rare that our expectations are met, let alone exceeded in this world. We all have to learn at some point that the world isn’t fair and it isn’t going to cater to our whims. Some learn this lesson slower than others, but there are times when it feels like the world throws us a bone.

I feel it whenever I’ve reached the end of a long, satisfying book. I feel it when I see a really good movie for the first time. I feel it when I reach the end of a video game and feel that every bit of effort is worth it. I felt that the first time I saw the Deadpool movie. I felt it the first time I played games like Mass Effect 3 and Final Fantasy X. It’s like reaching the top of a mountain. It’s a great feeling and the fact it doesn’t happen often makes it all the more enjoyable.

Number Five: That First Bite Into A Freshly Baked Cookie/Doughnut/Slice of Pizza

We all have to eat. We all need food to survive. Some enjoy it more than others. Some enjoy it too much. It’s a lot like sex in that respect. Some see it as just a biological process and some turn it into a goddamn religious experience. Also like sex, food has certain situations where it’s extra blissful.

For me, that involves the first bite. We all know that feeling. It’s when we’re at our most hungry. It’s when the food is at its most fresh. It’ll never be as savory and we’ll never want it more before that bite. When it comes, it just feels special. It feels like jumping into a pool on a hot summer day. Sure, we’ll finish our meal and fulfill our basic needs for survival, but that doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy the hell out of it.

So those are my Top 5 simple pleasures. I’m sure there are dozens more. I’m sure my list is very different from that of others. So if you have your own list, please share it! What do you consider to be a great simple pleasure that just makes your day a little better? I’d love to know. Life is complicated enough. Simple pleasures are a good way to make it meaningful.

Leave a comment

Filed under Jack Fisher's Insights

Tagged as , , , , , , ,

September 17, 2016 · 8:36 pm

What Can Bonobo Monkeys Teach Us About Ourselves?

Human nature is a chaotic, complicated, and often frustrating phenomenon. It can be disturbing and scary, but it can also be heart-warming and downright hilarious.

Go on Youtube and watch fifteen minutes of nut shot videos. Then, watch 15 minutes of videos showing soldiers returning to their families. It’ll make you laugh, cry, and smile, not necessarily in that order. So long as you stay away from bad sitcoms and Honey Boo Boo reruns, you’ll feel some level of pride in being human.

That said, we still have room for improvement. Human nature is not a finished product. It’s more like a never-ending beta version of a high-end product where the engineers tasked with fixing it are drunk, stoned, and brain damaged. As an aspiring writer who focuses heavily on the sexier parts of human nature, this is something I need to keep up with to some degree.

This brings me to Bonobo monkeys. Confused? I promise that’s not as big a non-sequiter as it seems. Unless you’re one of those ardent religious types who has to believe that mankind was molded into being by some invisible magic man in the sky, as described in a 2,000-year-old holy book written in multiple languages that nobody even speaks anymore, monkeys offer an important insight into human nature. They’re our closest evolutionary cousin. That means we can learn from them and learn about ourselves.

So why single out Bonobo monkeys? Well, being an erotica/romance writer, a better question would be how could I not? While primate behavior is as varied as the menu on Dunkin Donuts, Bonobos set themselves apart in a big way. They really love to fuck.

When I say they love to fuck, I don’t mean that in the crude way that every porn star claims in the middle of a low-budget skin flick. I mean they love to fuck to a point where it’s a big part of their society. They don’t treat it the same way every sitcom since Leave It To Beaver treats it. They use it to create a stable, cohesive society. Excuse me. I just teared up a little.

This is very much the antithesis of how we humans approach sexuality. Whether by evolution or our own erratic proclivities, we’re downright schizophrenic when it comes to sex. Some societies treat it with open enthusiasm. Some, especially those derived from the Abrahamic traditions, treat it a stabbing pain in our nether regions that we try desperately to ignore. If Bonobos could talk, they’d probably think we’re crazy.

I’ve discussed the many ways our deranged society creates unhealthy attitudes towards sex. They drive us apart. They create conflict between genders. They turn us into hypocrites. They even make us mutilate our own genitals. I know human nature has room for improvement, but even if we grade ourselves on a curve, we have to admit we’re pretty damn inept.

So how do Bonobos do it better? What makes their approach to sex so much more refined? What can we learn from it? Well, Psychology Today put together a quick list of sexy lessons from our evolutionary cousins and, given our inability to make up our goddamn minds about sex, we’d be wise to listen.

Psychology Today: 7 Things Bonobos Can Teach Us About Love And Sex

Lesson One: More sex equals less conflict

This makes too much sense to ignore. We already have prime examples of how societies of sexually deprived men can cause a lot of problems. Sex, like hunger and survival, is a very basic drive. In the same way we do crazy shit when we’re hungry, we do crazy shit when we’re horny and have no outlet. We feel conflicted. We feel frustrated. We pick fights, start conflicts, and forget why the hell we’re so angry in the first place. When you’re getting laid often, you’re too content for conflict. Bonobos are proof of that.

Lesson Two: Feminism can be very sexy

I know I just pissed off the Men’s Rights activities, which isn’t hard to begin with, but bear with me here. The feminism Bonobos practice isn’t the same feminism that’s designed to bust men’s balls and create bullshit trigger warnings. In Bonobo society, females are in charge. Males aren’t their bitches, but they don’t get to run the show just because they have nuts to flex. They need to respect the other gender and in doing so, they get laid more. In other words, it’s the kind of feminism that’s a win-win for both genders. What a concept, right?

Lesson Three: Sisterhood is powerful

I don’t think this is a lesson that needs to be belabored too much. Anyone who has seen women at a bachelor party or in quality lesbian porn know that women know how to form close bonds. They’re much better at it then men, who will cut each other’s throats over arguments about which Star Wars prequel sucked most. Creating bonds is an important component for any social species and we humans love to complicate it. Bonobos go out of their way not to. We have no excuses.

Lesson Four: Jealousy ISN’T romantic

I’ve already talked about this before. Jealousy implies you actually own the love and lust of another individual. That doesn’t sit well with me and I don’t think it should sit well with anyone on some levels. Bonobos seem to be several steps ahead in that regard. They don’t seem to care about their partners humping others. This actually creates less conflict. While I’m sure their version of Jerry Springer is much more boring, they’re probably okay with that.

Lesson Five: There’s promise in promiscuity

I’ve written about this as well. Despite what the James Dobsons and Rick Santorums of the world would have you believe, there are clear benefits to sexual promiscuity. The lack of conflict, close bonds, and low stress of Bonobo life is proof that those benefits can be considerable. Granted, they don’t have to worry about revenge porn, Maury Povich, and taboos on adultery, but they make the most of what their sexuality has to offer. They enjoy its pleasures and its utility. Again, that shouldn’t be such a novel concept, but we humans just can’t resist complicating these basic things.

Lesson Six: Good sex doesn’t always include an orgasm and casual doesn’t necessarily mean empty or cheap

I’m starting to think my brain is part Bonobo because I’ve written about this too with my strong opinions on foreplay. Sex isn’t just about taking a trip to O-town or making new soldiers/farmers to keep society going. It’s an important bonding mechanism. It fosters closeness and companionship, two extremely vital things for social species like humans and Bonobos. Humans create societies where huggers like me are terrified of making intimate contact with one another. Bonobos create societies where sex is their version of a handshake. Is it any wonder why there’s so little conflict?

Lesson Seven: Sex and food go together better than love and marriage

No, this isn’t about some kinky food fetish. I’ll save that discussion for a future book. Outside certain types of specialized porn, humans treat food and sex as distinctly separate. Bonobos like to blur the lines. When they come upon a large source of food, they’ll celebrate with a quick orgy to work up an appetite. I’m not sure what the logic is behind this. I don’t know that they think, “Look at all the delicious food! Let’s celebrate by having sex!” However, it’s one of those twisted brands of logic that just makes too much sense.

Despite the many benefits of Bonobo society, humans still like to think of themselves as more advanced. In many ways, they are. We have skyscrapers, nuclear weapons, and spray cheese in a can. Bonobos have none of that and it doesn’t help that they’re an endangered species. However, the unique quirks of their society and the way they’re able to function should give us something to think about.

We humans love to complicate sexuality, creating all of these bizarre and irrational taboos that we refuse to give up, even when they become outdated. We can advance so much as a civilization, but as a species, we’re still painfully slow learners. So why not take a few notes from our evolutionary ancestors? It might help us enjoy our success a little more. If nothing else, it’ll give erotica/romance writers like me plenty of kinky ideas to work with. For that, I thank you, Bonobos.

4 Comments

Filed under Jack Fisher's Insights

Tagged as , , , , , , ,

September 16, 2016 · 6:29 am

Virtual Reality: The Future/End of Intimacy?

There was a time when the idea of having a hand-held device that allowed you to communicate directly with others, translate multiple languages, and access a near-limitless database of free porn seemed absurd. In fact, it seemed so futuristic that these fanciful devices often showed up in sci-fi shows like Star Trek. How many people who watched that show really thought that such a device was even possible?

That time really wasn’t that long ago. I’m still old enough to remember pagers and flip phones. That alone makes me feel way older than I want to, but it illustrates an important point. What seems like crazy science fiction today can become a reality in the future. It can even happen within our lifetime.

There are people who grew up watching Star Trek who now have smartphones. I can only imagine how amazed they must feel whenever they send an email, translate a conversation, or watch free porn. It’s an amazing and beautiful thing, right?

There’s another futuristic, seemingly impossible gadget that, for the moment, is still relegated to the world of Star Trek. It’s a gadget that also relates to my ongoing discussion about hugs and the importance of human contact.

It’s a gadget that has the potential to disrupt society in ways that pales in comparison to smartphones. In fact, it could be so disruptive that some speculate that it could be mankind’s last invention. Which invention could be this disruptive? Ladies, gentlemen, and those of unspecified gender, I give you the holodeck.

Without getting into the sci-fi jargon that will probably get me beat up by angry Trekkies and physicists, I’ll stick to the basics here. A holodeck is basically the ultimate extreme in virtual reality. It creates simulations so life-like that they’re indistinguishable from reality. If our feeble brains, which are still working under the assumption that we’re cavemen living on the African savanna, interprets it as reality, how can we possibly tell the difference?

Our brains are already easily fooled. It’s not just funny brain teasers that make us question our own internal wiring. As I’ve pointed out on this blog many times before, our brains aren’t wired to make sense of reality. They’re wired to help us survive and reproduce. That’s part of why we have such wonderful evolutionary manifestations like orgasms. In that context, it stands no chance against a holodeck.

It may seem like such an advancement is a long ways off, but I imagine early Stark Trek fans thought the same about smartphones. This invention is already in its nascent stage. At the moment, we call it virtual reality and it’s just starting to develop a consumer base.

Thanks to continued advances in computing power and a growing market for more immersive experiences, VR is becoming more mainstream and affordable by the average consumer. Like personal computers and smartphones before it, VR is creating a new market for new experiences. Those experiences, by the way, will probably involve virtual porn.

New markets mean new profits. History shows time and again if there’s a profit to be made, it’s going to happen. It’s the reason the War on Drugs is doomed to fail. It’s the reason the wars on porn, smoking, and everything fun that religion and government despises is doomed to fail. It’s also the reason why VR will become more and more indistinguishable from reality as time goes on. The recent success of Pokémon Go is proof enough of that.

So that begs the question: what happens to us when we reach the point where we have a functioning holodeck? What does that mean for the human race? What will it mean for our basic desires for intimacy?

Well, let’s all channel our inner horny teenager for a moment and state the obvious. Just as we saw with VHS and home video technology, VR and holodecks will likely be used for porn. This isn’t speculation. This is a certainty. Someone is working on this right now as we speak. You can count on it.

Do a quick thought experiment and picture how you’d use a holodeck. If I’m really horny, I could create an entire army of beautiful women that look like a mix of Kate Upton, Halle Berry, Scarlett Johanson, and even Starfire from DC Comics if I want. In case you’ve forgotten, Starfire looks like this.

See where I’m going with this? On top of that, with the right programming, I can make these simulations do whatever perverse shit I can think of. If I want them to cover their bodies in oil, pour chocolate on my dick, and take turns licking it up, I can do that.

I’m sure that’s not the kinkiest thing I could do. I’m sure there are others out there with far kinkier proclivities. A woman using such a device could create a football team of Channing Tatums and Brad Pitts, each programmed to cover her body in honey and lick it off.

I’ll stop speculating right now because I think I’m revealing too much about my own perverse fantasies. Also, they’re making me very hungry. Maybe writing this on an empty stomach was a bad idea, but it’s too late now.

It doesn’t matter how perverse your tastes are. They can even be outright illegal. So what if someone uses a holodeck to have sex with a baby elephant? It’s a simulation. It’s technically not hurting anyone or anything real. Even so, the mere fact that someone will probably use a holodeck to do something like this is kind of a mood-killer.

Again, our brains aren’t wired to be rational and make sense of reality. It’s wired for survival and reproduction. So if a holodeck simulation is that realistic, our brains literally aren’t equipped to tell the difference.

Imagine the kind of confusion this would cause. Hell, this would be 10 steps beyond confusion. This is a dissociation with reality on par with The Matrix. When a simulation becomes that real and malleable, would we even want to escape? It’s either face a cold, harsh reality or spend more time wrestling naked with Starfire and Halle Berry. That’s not a balanced decision, to say the least.

Whether you’re an anti-social sociopath or a hugger like me, a holodeck can literally give you everything you need to fulfill all the physical and emotional needs you want. I can go from having a three-way with a couple of supermodels to hugging every member of my family, even those who have passed away, on a whim. The caveman wiring of my brain will tell me I’m doing exactly what I need to survive and reproduce. Why would it want me to stop?

The cynical side of me says that I’ll join the billions of other humans on this planet who will go extinct with a big, content smile on my face. However, the less jaded side of me, which also happens to be the side that helps me craft sexy romance stories, thinks there are other possibilities.

If history is any guide, and it often is, human beings can and do adapted to these major disruptions. The 20th century gave us a number of examples, but one in particular stands out. It involves the impact of contraception and, to a similar extent, antibiotics.

It’s easy to forget in a era where contraception is so ordinary that only right-wing religious nut-jobs like Rick Santorum speak against it. Women today have all sorts of methods for controlling their fertility, deciding when and in what circumstances they’ll bear children.

This is a huge shift compared to the bulk of human history where contraception was limited to pulling out, make-shift condoms, and the medical treatments on par with smearing chicken entrails on tumors. Then, after centuries of uncertainty and superstition, we created something that worked. It worked so well that it disrupted a great many these assumptions we once had about society.

Think, for a moment, how jarring that must have been. Suddenly, women don’t have to lament whether or not they’ll get pregnant after one night of reckless indulgence. Suddenly, society has some measure of control over a basic human function. It was exciting and scary. Hell, the Catholic Church is still scared to death of contraception, which is saying a lot from the folks that gave us 2,000 years of hellfire and brimstone.

Despite what religious institutions and bad reality TV shows would prefer, contraception is not going away. It impacted society immensely, but you know what? Society adapted. The human race hasn’t gone extinct. Civilization hasn’t collapsed. The fact that people can now hump without as many consequences as before didn’t destroy humanity. It just freed us up to focus on other things.

By and large, this shift has been positive. As society has adapted, violence throughout the industrialized world has declined sharply. Opportunities for women have risen as well and not just because they can have sex with fewer consequences. This disruption that upended centuries of limits did so much good. So how much good can advancements in VR and holodecks achieve?

It’s impossible to say, but it’s a question worth asking. What do people do when they have a means of meeting their physical, emotional, and sexual needs with relative ease? We’ve never lived in a society like that before. Remember, though, until recently, we had never lived in a society where women had control over their fertility. We had no idea what to expect, but we adapted. We improved as a civilization and there’s still room for improvement.

I don’t want to be too much of an optimist. With every advancement comes challenges and pitfalls we can’t possibly foresee. At some point, somebody will use VR or holodecks to do something that’ll make us throw up. However, like those who use ski-masks poorly, we must take the good with the bad.

In the end, I believe the good will outweigh the bad. I think when human society has a means of meeting all their physical, emotional, and sexual needs, the sheer breadth of human potential will be realized.

What form might this potential make? How would such a society function? How would it adapt? These are all important questions to ask, but they’re impossible to answer right now. That said, they could make for an interesting premise of a book. Think about it, a story involving a holodeck told by an erotica/romance writer who writes stories about strippers and sex cults? That could be interesting, among other things.

1 Comment

Filed under Jack Fisher's Insights

Tagged as , , , , , , , ,

September 15, 2016 · 6:02 am

Solitary Confinement: The Ultimate Torture?

To those of you out there who think you’re having a bad day, this may lift your spirits in all the wrong ways. To those of you who consider themselves huggers who are fond of intimate contact, as I most certainly do, this will be an exploration of your worst nightmare.

I’ve argued before that our current culture makes it painfully difficult for human beings to be intimate with one another. We have technology that puts screens between us, cultural taboos that prevent us from seeking each other out, and religious dogma that will make up elaborate myths to keep people from seeking satisfying intimacy. As bad as it is, it could still be much worse.

Enter the practice of solitary confinement. For those who consider themselves huggers, this is right up there with waterboarding and power tools in terms of torture. It’s one thing to inflict pain on someone. As anyone who has experimented with BDSM knows, the right kinds of pain can actually be enjoyable. With solitary confinement, however, that potential isn’t there. If anything, it does everything possible to nullify that potential.

According to the ever-reliable sources on Wikipedia, solitary confinement is defined as:

A form of imprisonment in which an inmate is isolated from any human contact.

On the surface, it doesn’t sound nearly as bad as being shanked to death or having fingernails ripped out. However, as is often the case with the worst forms of torture, it’s not the wound that kills you. It’s the festering scar that gets infected and kills you slowly that makes it really nasty.

Solitary confinement is the absolute antithesis of what it means to be a social creature. This is very important to consider because human beings are very social animals. Our brains are hard-wired to seek contact and coordination with others. From the time we’re infants to the time we’re senile old geezers, we naturally seek to be around one another.

First, it’s our parents and siblings. Then, it’s our friend and fellow neighbors. Then, it’s our lovers, our children, and our extended family. At every stage in our biological and social development, intimate and casual contact with other human beings is vital.

Using my favorite tool, caveman logic, this makes perfect sense. Unless we’re Arnold Schwarzenegger on meth, we have no chance of taking down a sabretooth tiger. If we work with other humans, creating tools and forming strategies, then we can do more than just hunt down animals. We can actually hunt them so well that we drive them to extinction.

Being effective social creatures is pretty damn important from an evolutionary standpoint. That’s why simple gestures like hugs have so many physical and mental benefits. It’s also way, according to Health.com, people who socialize more tend to live longer. It’s pretty much beyond dispute. Social interaction is good for us on some basic level.

The practice of solitary confinement kicks that concept in the balls and lights it on fire. It takes people, including those who may not be mentally healthy to begin with, and sticks them in a situation that drives a knife into the core of their psyche. It’s like trying to put out a fire with gasoline. It’s death by a billion paper-cuts. It’s bad is what I’m saying.

Now in the interest of balance, let me acknowledge that there is an element of cold pragmatism to solitary confinement. There are indeed individuals in this world whose brain function is so damaged, so dangerous, and so deranged that putting them around other people is a problem. As bad as solitary confinement is, there are times when it’s the best of the worst possible options.

The primary use of solitary confinement is to isolate these deranged individuals from others. In the past, it was even seen as a more human alternative to flogging and hanging. That may have been true for a certain period in history, but we’re not in that time period anymore and the non-Taliban crowd of the world doesn’t wish to go back.

As a society, I feel we should treat progress the same way I treat my aspiring writing career. We should always strive for improvement. Let’s not let ourselves stagnate or get complacent. There are just some things that are worth improving and this is one of them. We stopped hanging people. We stopped flogging them. We stopped using duels to settle legal disputes. Why can’t we do the same with solitary confinement?

There are organizations out there who classify solitary confinement as torture. The ACLU is one of them and their position on the practice is pretty clear.

With no evidence-based research of its effectiveness, solitary confinement is a form of imprisonment that has been overused and abused. According to the experts, the massive expansion of solitary confinement in America is a failed experiment of the late 20th century.

In recent years, a concerted effort has emerged to combat this practice and seek alternatives. According to the National Religious Campaign Against Torture, multiple states have passed legislation to curtail or regulate the practice. More legislation may follow and as a self-professed hugger, it can’t come soon enough.

Now there will be opponents who argue that not everyone suffers the same horrific effects of solitary confinement. There is even some research to back this claim. Even if this research is valid, this doesn’t justify the practice. Just because some people can handle being tortured and go onto live normal lives doesn’t mean it should be permitted. Not everyone is James Bond or Jack Bauer.

Whatever future research may or may not conclude, we don’t need to wait for the test results on certain aspects of human nature. We’re social animals. We hug, we interact, and we make love. It’s part of what makes us the most successful species on this planet. Solitary confinement is a kick in the balls to that success and I say our balls need not be subjected to such punishment.

7 Comments

Filed under Jack Fisher's Insights

Tagged as , , , , , , , ,

September 14, 2016 · 6:42 am

Another Manuscript Complete!

Just a quick announcing today and then I promise, I’ll get back to talking about fun, fuzzy topics like hugs and orgasms. I have an announcement to make and one that always puts a smile on my face. I, Jack Fisher, finished another manuscript. That’s right! Another elaborate tale from my creative (and at times perverse) mind is complete and it feels so good.

I love this part of the creative process. I like to think of it as the writing equivalent of afterglow. You did all the foreplay. You worked through each position. You achieved what you wanted. It may or may not have gotten a bit messy and uncomfortable at times. You still did it though. You finished the job and it’s a damn good feeling.

It’s a great feeling. It kind of reminds me of some other great feeling that involves physical exertion, intense focus, a touch of creativity, and intense satisfaction that makes you want to light up a cigarette and smile. I’m not sure which feeling it is right now, but I’m guessing most of you can figure it out for yourselves.

This story, which is still untitled, ended up being longer and more elaborate than I planned. I announced it months ago as a sci-fi thriller mixed with a little romance and erotica. I originally intended it to be short, focused, and concise. As is often the case, those intentions got thrown away faster than a used condom once I got into the dirty details of the story.

Overall, the final word count ended up being over 73,000 words. Without any revisions, that would make it the second longest book I’ve written after “Skin Deep.” Make no mistake though. There will be revisions. That’s a big part of the writing process. Anyone who writes a story with more plot than “Go Dog Go” knows this.

Revisions can be tedious and cumbersome. Like most pranks involving alcohol and fireworks, there are some concepts in a story that seem like good ideas at the time. Then, you read them over with a fresh set of eyes and question how sober you were when you came up with that idea.

I’ve certainly done my share of revising. Every book I’ve written has been subject to extensive revisions. I think “The Escort and the Gigolo” ended up being several thousand words shorter after I got done with it. When you’re trying to add polish to a story, especially one that emphasizes erotic and romantic elements, you want it to shine.

This book will be no different. It’s one of those projects that I’ll probably keep on the back-burner for a while until I can get a publisher or an editor to help me finalize it. That’s something I’m still working on with my other manuscripts. At the moment, it’s the biggest obstacle that stands between me and becoming a marginally successful writer.

I’m still wondering if I should pay for “Writers Market” services to find myself a publisher. I’m also still waiting to hear back from publishers like Crimson Frost on my previous submissions. Waiting sucks, but good things are worth waiting for. I hope this is one of them.

So now I have yet another completed project in my portfolio. In my line of work, you can never have too much. That also means I’m just about ready to start my next project, which I’ve already discussed in a previous post. I hope to start that soon once the afterglow wears off.

As always, I’m interested in what others have to say about my ambitions. I’m not a success yet. I’m an aspiring writer, not a successful one. That means I don’t have the luxury of turning away advice, criticism, and general comments. I know this blog gets about as much traffic as store that sells only used gum, but I’m willing to put in the work to make this endeavor a success. Another completed manuscript is just another part of the process.

1 Comment

Filed under Book Announcement

Tagged as , , , , , , ,

September 13, 2016 · 6:09 am

Being A Hugger In This Day And Age

I’d like to get personal again. I’ve already confessed to sleeping naked. I’ve also made clear that I see foreplay as the highest of virtues. Now, I’d like to highlight another important trait of mine, one I actually mentioned in my post on foreplay. This trait isn’t as lurid or sexy as others, but it’s one of those traits that has the potential to be in the right context. So what is it? Well, here it is:

I, Jack Fisher, am a hugger.

Yes, I understand that it’s one of the least macho things you can do these days. It’s right up there with wearing makeup and crying over soap operas. It’s a taboo and a bad one at that. I don’t know when it happened. I don’t know why it happened. For reasons that defy logic, understanding, and basic human nature, it actually became cool to be a callous, detached, unemotional douche-bag at some point. I usually try to research the complex cultural reasons behind such a movement. This time, however, I found next to nothing.

The only educated guess I can make, which is pushing it because I’m not that educated, is that society’s collective fears and scorn over men sexually assaulting women went a tad overboard. It’s a perfectly legitimate concern, wanting to discourage sexual assault and sexual harassment in general. It’s a terrible crime so I can’t blame society for overdoing it, but there’s a fine line between fighting crime and turning people into callous douche-bags.

From a purely evolutionary standpoint, there’s no reason why hugs and intimate contact should be discouraged. According to Dr. Fahad  Basheer at Collective Evolution, there are at least 11 medical benefits to hugs. These benefits include, but aren’t limited to, relieving pain, elevating mood, alleviating depression, improving immune function, and reducing stress. If hugging were a pharmaceutical drug, it would be hailed as wonder drugs and probably banned by the DEA.

These health benefits, much like the health benefits of orgasms, strongly indicate that we’re hard-wired for hugs. Nature wants us to hug each other. It doesn’t matter if it’s a lover, a family member, or a stranger. Our biology, being so basic and crude, doesn’t care where the hug comes from. It still benefits us.

The benefits aren’t even restricted to humans. Nature is rarely that specific. Animals do it to and they seem to gain similar benefits.

My parents and siblings seemed to understand that. I come from a family that is big on hugging. It’s not necessarily a cultural thing. It’s just how we are. However, I notice when I go out into the modern world, I’m terrified of making too much intimate contact with others. I don’t think that’s healthy.

I don’t exactly know where this fear comes from, but I have a pretty strong feeling it started during my time in the daily prison sentence that was public school. I don’t know if anyone knows this, but public schools have a big problem with students touching each other in any way. How big a problem? Well, in 2013, a student in Georgia got suspended for a year for hugging his teacher.

That’s right. A school punished a kid for hugging someone. Let that sink in for a moment. Hugging is not like sex. It doesn’t cause pregnancy. It doesn’t cause disease. It doesn’t cause emotional distress of any kind. It has so many natural benefits that transcend species, yet we punish kids for doing it. Then, we wonder why they grow up to have emotional problems and personality disorders.

Now the school I went to never did something this extreme, but I do remember from a young age hearing all sorts of lectures about harassment and inappropriate touching, as they called it. I may have been a dumb-ass kid, but even I knew what they were getting at. They wanted to discourage kids from getting too sexual when they were too young and immature.

That’s all well and good, but it’s worth repeating that I was a dumb-ass kid in a whole building full of them. How are we supposed to know what constitutes inappropriate touching? A hug for some people might as well be slap on the ass with a wooden spoon for someone else. We never learned much about context and communication. Most of the time, we just got a thorough run-down of all the terrible punishments we can expect if we ever got caught inappropriately touching someone.

Being kids who still had some respect for authority figures, we naturally focus on the punishments. We don’t want to get in trouble. We don’t want to explain to our parents why we got suspended or sent to detention. Naturally, we’re going to play it safe and just avoid it all together.

As kids, fear of punishment tends to make us overcompensate. It’s just human nature. Again, it’s caveman logic. We’re not going to just stand a few feet away from a shady area where a lion might be hiding. We’re going to make sure we’re a long ways away from that danger.

It doesn’t just affect us as kids in school either. After spending our entire childhood terrified of making too much intimate contact with other human beings, we carry that terror into the adult world, both in college campuses and in the workplace.

We currently live in an era where harassment doesn’t even need to occur. There only needs to be an accusation that a man assaulted a woman and that’s it. No trial. No jury. No indisputable evidence of any kind. Just the accusation is enough to assure guilt in the eyes of the public. This leads to legal clusterfucks like the Duke Lacrosse ordeal and the false UVA rape case.

So as a man, it’s dangerous for me to hug someone. It could cost me my reputation, my freedom, and a boatload of time and legal fees. It only takes one woman to misinterpret a hug, accuse me of assault, and my life is over.

This actually played out very recently. Earlier this year, I went on a date with a girl to see the movie, X-men: Apocalypse, which should come as no surprise to anyone. I really liked this girl. I thought she was cute. I thought we had a good connection. However, I didn’t know how she would react to a hug so I was fucking terrified of getting too intimate too fast. That may have worked against me because we never went on a second date.

As a self-professed hugger, how the hell am I to function in a world like this? How am I supposed to find love, affection, and intimacy with others outside my immediate family? This modern world sends so many conflicting messages. We’re more connected than ever thanks to technology, but a single hug can get us sued for sexual assault if we hug the wrong person.

I don’t like this trend. I don’t think it’s good for huggers like me or people in general. We’ve become too callous and isolated. We’re scared to death from a young age, albeit indirectly, into avoiding contact with one another. It goes against our own nature. It goes against our own humanity. I may never live to see the day where hugging a perfect stranger won’t get you sued, but I’d like to aspire to such a future, both through my love of hugs and through my books.

15 Comments

Filed under Jack Fisher's Insights

Tagged as , , , , , , , , , ,

September 12, 2016 · 6:58 am

Important Life Lesson From An X-men Comic: Don’t Skip Foreplay

Growing up, we all learn valuable life lessons from various sources. For some people, they get many of their lessons from reruns of “Leave It To Beaver.” Others get it from new episodes of “Modern Family.” Others still will cite the works of the Bible, J. R. R. Tolkien, William Shakespeare, or Weird Al Yankovick. Not all convey the same lessons. Not all of those lessons are healthy either. The point is we derive them from our own sources.

For me, I’ve derived most of my lessons from superhero comics. I think I’ve already made that clear on this blog. I’ve used superhero comics to cite sex-positive heroes like Starfire and to demonstrate the worst possible example of a love triangle gone wrong. Today, I’d like to cite superhero comics again to convey another valuable lesson that I think every man and woman can appreciate.

What is that lesson, you ask? How valuable can it possibly be? Well, during times like this when our culture is driving us farther and farther apart, this lesson cannot be more vital. So to all the men and women out there, young and old, gay or straight, please heed this lesson. It comes courtesy of the X-men once more and from Ororo Munro, aka Storm, so you know it’s not something you should ignore.

stormforeplay

This scene comes courtesy of Amazing X-men #1, a comic released back in late 2013. The woman with the red hair is Firestar. She’s a new teacher for the X-men. The short guy with the manliest mutton chops in the universe is Wolverine, a man whose romantic history alone is more epic than any other hero. The woman next to him, who makes pretty damn clear that foreplay is not to be skipped, is Storm.

That’s right. The same woman who controls weather, unleashes hurricanes, and further enhances Halle Berry’s sex appeal has a very important policy with respect to foreplay. It’s a policy we should all adopt. Hell, let’s make it a brand new commandment. Let’s all agree that whatever gods or goddesses we worship have delivered upon us a new revelation that shall henceforth be among mankind’s highest morals.

Thoust Shalt NOT Skip Foreplay

The human race can’t agree on much. I think we can make an exception here. In the X-men comics, Storm was once worshiped as a goddess. It’s not just because she can end droughts, kick-start tornado, and shock your ass with lightning if you get on her bad side. She also looks like this, in case you’ve forgotten.

Would any sane heterosexual man or homosexual woman dare deny this woman foreplay? Unless you’re itching for a lightning bolt to the spine, I think not. She is not one to do anything callously or half-hearted. If she’s going to let anyone into her panties, they damn well better put some effort into it. That means foreplay is right up there with air in terms of importance.

It’s a damn good policy from a damn good character. There’s a damn good reason why Storm is played by the likes of Halle Berry and why she’s widely seen as one of the greatest female superheroes of all time. She commands respect. She exudes charisma. The fact she’s also sexy as hell is a nice bonus too. So when she says foreplay is that important, it’s a lesson we ought to heed.

It doesn’t just apply to one gender as well. Ladies, I’m going to let you in on a little secret about men that really shouldn’t be a secret in the first place. Here it is:

Men really enjoy foreplay.

I know. Shocking, isn’t it? Well, it shouldn’t be. I don’t know why it became popular that men don’t appreciate foreplay. It’s a bad joke, the idea that men just want to bend a woman over a dirty table and get right to the humping. I’m sure there are men who do that. I’m sure there are women who do that too. It’s not the template on which most men build a satisfying intimate encounter.

As a man, I can say without reservation that I love foreplay. Hell, what’s not to love? The kissing, the touching, the sentiment all work in conjunction to build a satisfying experience. I love it even more when the woman puts just as much effort into it. I can’t speak for all men, but I think I speak for plenty when I say we like to share in the work.

As a point of reference for the ladies, allow me to paint a clearer picture. Look back at that snapshot of Amazing X-men #1. Then, remember for a moment that Hugh Jackman played Wolverine in the X-men movies and he looked like this while doing it.

Ask yourself honestly, ladies. Would you skip the foreplay with a man like that? I’m not gay, but even I’d want to get a feel for those manly ass muscles.

Now please don’t make light of the message I’m sending here. Some may read this post and think of it as just some naughty satire from an aspiring erotica writer. It’s not. I really do believe that this is a vital lesson for men and women alike. Foreplay matters. Intimacy matters. Don’t skip it.

We live in an increasingly detached world. We also live in a world where one too many gestures can be classified as harassment. It’s making us reluctant to embrace each other. As someone who is a hugger by nature, this worries me. Even WebMD agrees with me and Storm that foreplay is vital.

Human beings are social creatures by nature. We seek intimate contact with one another and not just for sex. So whether you’re gay, straight, man, woman, trans, or something in between, please heed the lessons of Storm and the X-men. Do not skip the foreplay. Enjoy the intimate company of your partners. It’s good for your body and your soul.

25 Comments

Filed under Jack Fisher's Insights

Tagged as , , , , , , , , ,

September 11, 2016 · 10:05 am

On Football and 9/11

Today is an exciting, but solemn day. It’s inescapable. We all remember where we were 15 years ago during the September 11th attacks on Washington DC and New York. I live near Washington DC. The idea that there was a terrorist attack so close to home hit me pretty hard. I like to think people in my area have gotten used to the heightened awareness of terrorism, but there are just some things you can’t and shouldn’t get used to.

I certainly remember where I was on that day. I was still in school at the time. It wasn’t exactly announced at first because nobody knew what was going on. I only found out when I heard one of my teachers talking about it with another. This was also at a time before cell phones became really common so a lot of people were freaking out. Some kids had family who worked in the Pentagon. I really can’t imagine the kind of dread they must have felt at the time.

For me, personally, I wasn’t sure how to feel about it. Maybe I still don’t on some levels. Back then, I was kind of a cynical little shit. I didn’t enjoy myself at school and I often looked for the worst in everything, be it global news or algebra exams. So in many respects, I think I was kind of numb to the initial impact. As time went on, though, it the 9/11 attacks taught me some valuable lessons.

First and foremost, there is a lot of hate in this world. Human beings are capable of some pretty sadistic shit and not just to those around them. There are people who cannot or will not let go of this hate. They’ll look for any excuse to justify it.

Some use politics from several decades ago as an excuse. Some even use politics from several centuries ago. Some will use their religion, their ethnicity, or their race. At the end of the day though, all those excuses are empty and shallow. That doesn’t matter though. When people feel hate this strong, they don’t just search for reasons to justify it. They search for reasons to cling to it.

As I’ve said before on this blog, the human brain isn’t wired to be rational. It’s wired for survival. Hatred may have some survival value. It really helps to hate that hungry bear that’s attacking your friends and family when you go after it. It’s not so helpful in an era where we have to worry about nuclear weapons more than bear attacks.

It’s a tragic byproduct of our human nature. We cling to hate and seek an outlet. There are many ways to confront it. I’ve even explored a few on this blog and in my books. This is what leads me to football.

Confused? Well bear with me. I promise this isn’t a non-sequiter. Like many Americans, I love football. I’m a huge NFL fan. I build my entire Sundays around watching football. Today is no different, but since today also happens to be the 15th anniversary of the 9/11 attacks, I think it provides a unique opportunity.

Football is a violent contact sport. It channels some of our most basic emotions in a way that requires the utmost skill and dedication. Emotions like hate, love, passion, excitement, dedication, drive, sorrow all come into play. Both teams have to hate each other on some levels to want to hit each other. They also have to love their teammates on some level to work with them and trust them. It’s a chaotic, but potent combination of emotions that all manifest in the form of a game.

In some respects, it’s a good metaphor for how we manage these emotions that drive us. Men who hate so much that they’re willing to kill innocent people by the thousands do a piss poor job of managing those emotions. Football players are far more skilled in that respect. With those skills, they channel the emotions of millions of fans like me into something positive. It’s an a testament to the breadth of human experiences and one we should all celebrate/commemorate on a day such as this.

So are you ready for some football? After seven long months, I sure as hell am!

5 Comments

Filed under Jack Fisher's Insights

Tagged as , , , ,

September 10, 2016 · 10:57 am

An Idea For My Next Book

After spending the week discussing distressing topics like circumcision, including a distressing anecdote about my own circumcision, I’m ready to move onto topics that don’t completely kill the mood. I’m trying to be a successful romance/erotica writer, damn it! I need to keep that mood sexy on this blog. Maybe this will help.

With that in mind, I thought I’d provide a quick update on my current work. For the past couple months, I’ve been writing the first draft to a sci-fi romance story. It’s a story that has turned out to be much longer and much bigger than I initially planned. That tends to happen with my stories. I start writing them, but they go in directions I don’t expect, hopefully for the better.

Despite the size of this story, I can say that it’s almost over. I hope to finish it within the next few days. Even with the end of another book in sight, I like to think ahead to my next book. It’s just how my mind works. It’s not enough to just finish something. I have to have another project waiting in the wings that’ll help me improve. I’ve done this ever since I wrote Child of Orcus. Part of getting good at any craft is always seeking to improve.

As it turns out, the stuff I do on this blog actually helps me explore new ideas. By writing about certain topics, be they insights into sex-positive comic book characters or my love of sleeping naked, it gets my brain in the right state, among other parts of my body. One topic in particular got me thinking.

A while back, I explored the issue of jealousy. I asked whether or not this was a truly natural emotion or a byproduct of our cultural and societal attitudes. It’s not a question I expected to answer. It’s one of those questions that can’t really be answered for everybody, but does make us think differently about concepts of romance.

This leads into this new idea. I don’t have a title for it yet (although I am open to suggestions), but I feel like this is an idea I should pursue. Here’s the scenario:

We have two people, a man and a woman who married young and did all the right things. They love each other. They support each other. They both have fulfilling careers that keep them busy. By all accounts, they followed society’s rules towards relationships, sex, and romance. Despite this, they’re still deeply unsatisfied.

Did I mention that the man works as a body guard at high end clubs that cater to beautiful women and aspiring Hollywood stars? Did I also mention that the woman works as trainer to top male athletes? If not, I guess I should mention it because this line of work surrounds them with all sorts of beautiful people and a lot of temptation. Think about it. If your work involves hard-partying women and sexy male athletes, wouldn’t you be tempted?

Some people can brush off that temptation. These two can’t. Following the unspoken rules that society says they should follow just isn’t enough for them. It leaves them feeling stressed, frustrated, and incomplete.

Finally, they come to one inescapable conclusion. They can’t be monogamous. It just isn’t how they’re wired. They need to step outside these rules. They need to explore the temptation that surrounds them. If for no other reason, they need to see if this fulfills them.

This leads them to join a special private club in the Hollywood Hills. It’s a club run by a mysterious woman who claims she can make their love stronger by immersing them in a world of sex, decadence, and excess. It sounds crazy. Hell, it’s the outright antithesis of the rules they so ardently followed. So why not give it a try?

This is the main base of the story. Larger details, like the names of the characters or the names of the club, haven’t been fleshed out yet. I intend to wait until I finish my current book before I work on issues like that. Until then, I feel like this is the story I want to tell next. This is the concept I want to explore.

There are already so many romance/erotica stories out there about two people falling in love and facing challenges to their relationship. Hell, I’ve written some of those stories myself. Sure, they’re fun and titillating in their own right. I want to try a different route. I want to tell a different kind of love story.

I admit it is counter-intuitive, the idea that two people can love each other and still give into temptation. It’s basically the basis of 95 percent of all bad pornos. I think there’s a more meaningful story to tell. I think there are more relevant issues to explore. I hope to do that with this book. I also hope I can get a publisher to take a chance on it.

I’ll provide additional details and insight later on. Until then, I’m always happy to hear back from others. What do you think of this idea? Is it something you’re interested in reading? Is it something you’re interested in discussing? I’m only an aspiring writer at the moment. That’s code for, “I’m not a success and have a lot of free time.” So I’m more than happy to chat about this or any other sexy/romantic topic.

1 Comment

Filed under Book Announcement

Tagged as , , , , , , ,

September 9, 2016 · 6:31 am

Busting Myths About Circumcision

Brace yourself. I’m going to do one more post about circumcision. I promise this will be the last time I bring up this topic, at least for a while. As I said in my little personal side-note on the subject, I don’t enjoy talking about this. No man does. That’s why it’s taboo. However, like all taboos, it’s something worth confronting.

We already know there are all sorts of crazy myths and taboos about sex. It’s such an uncomfortable, awkward, complex topic that too many people insist on making more complex than it needs to be. I’ve already done a post about busting the most popular myths about sex. Now, I intend to do the same with circumcision.

Unlike some of the other sexual myths, circumcision is one of those taboos that disproportionally affects Americans more than most other western countries. According to the World Health Organization, only about a third of the global male population over the age of 15 is circumcised whereas the prevalence in America is around 79 percent. Even if you suck at math, you know that’s not a trivial difference.

While it’s true that circumcision has cultural roots that go back centuries, the reasons for those traditions aren’t the same here in the USA. In Bronze Age times, circumcision was primarily a religious rite and a cultural practice. Their reasons may have been practical on some levels. This is an era where rubbing goat shit on your face probably counted as makeup so there may have been some hygienic benefits.

It actually goes beyond that. Back in these times, tribes of people did all sorts of things to identify themselves as part of a certain tribe. It’s easy enough for someone to just join a group by drinking a shot glass full of wasabi, but for someone to snip off part of their dick? That takes dedication. That shows that someone isn’t just a member of a tribe. They’re committed.

Fast forward to the 19th and 20th century and we don’t need those kinds of tribal practices anymore. We have Facebook accounts, Twitter feeds, and social security numbers to identify ourselves and our groups. There’s no need to mutilate part of your dick. However, we still do it, thanks in no small part to the efforts of anti-masturbation crusaders like John Harvey Kellogg. Even after Mr. Kellogg’s bullshit fears about masturbation were debunked, we still do it.

People still give reasons for it. They even claim to back these reasons up with science. That doesn’t necessarily mean it’s good science. So as a public service, I’d like to list some of these myths and why they’re bullshit. This is a list compiled by the fine folks of the India Times. Feel free to reject, accept, or verify them as you see fit.

Common Male Circumcision Myths Debunked

Myth #1: Circumcision is an effective way to prevent HIV

Fact: The World Health Organization (WHO) and the Joint United Nations Programme on HIV/AIDS (UNAIDS) states that “Male circumcision should be recognised as an additional, important strategy for prevention of heterosexually acquired HIV in men…(but) should never replace known methods of HIV prevention.” However, this does not provide any kind of protective benefit to the female partner involved and instead puts her at risk of contracting HIV.

Myth #2: Circumcision prevents penile cancer

Fact: No clear evidence has been concluded to state that circumcision completely prevents penile cancer. However, it is worth noting that the penile cancer rate is much lower among circumcised men than uncircumcised men.

Myth #3: Infants do not feel pain during circumcision

Fact: Many doctors do not believe in the use of anesthetic during circumcision. But circumcision is quite painful for the infant just like in any other older child or adult. Even the analgesic used during this procedure only decrease the pain and does not eliminate it completely. The baby will feel discomfort for about seven to ten days.

Myth #4: Circumcision is a perfectly harmless procedure

Fact: Circumcision is painful and can cause infections, hemorrhage, scarring, urinary problems, etc.

Myth #5: Circumcision can completely prevent urinary tract infections (UTIs)

Fact: There was one study conducted back in 1985 that stated that circumcised babies were immune to UTI. However, further studies conducted since then found no such backing that circumcision completely prevented the risk of urinary tract infections.

Still not convinced? Well, as I’ve said before, I know this is a touchy subject. It’s difficult to talk about. As with most things though, it can be made easier through the use of crude humor. So if you’re not interested in reading articles about circumcision, here’s a funny little video from the folks at College Humor that should explain/debunk circumcision just as well. If you have a weak stomach, but a good sense of humor, then you should be okay.

5 Comments

Filed under Jack Fisher's Insights

Tagged as , , , , , , ,